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    Category: Pets & Animals

    Not A Morning Era Person

    | Canberra, ACT, Australia | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Family & Kids, Pets & Animals

    (I’m working an early morning shift at the checkout. It is not my regular shift and I am not a morning person so I’m not very clear headed. My register is next to the door that leads into the mall. I’m ringing up a customer when there is a really loud high-pitched shriek from outside.)

    Me: “Pterodactyl!”

    (I then realise its just one of the small children outside.)

    Customer: “I’m sure that’s what their parents think sometimes.”

    Me: “No, no. I actually thought it was a pterodactyl. That was the first thing that came into my head.”

    (The customer looked at me funny for the rest of the transaction.)

    Milking The Conversation

    | CT, USA | Pets & Animals

    (I work at a dairy farm milking cows. Every milking, without fail, a conversation like this happens between us and one of the cows:)

    Bertha: “Moo.”

    Worker #1: “Hi, Bertha!”

    Bertha: “Mooooo.”

    Worker #2: “What’s the matter, girl?”

    Bertha: “Mooo.”

    Worker #1: “Are you hungry, Bertha?”

    Bertha: “Mooooooooooo.”

    Worker #2: “Be patient. We’re almost done.”

    Bertha: “Mooo.”

    (At this point, just as we are about to let her loose, Bertha always poops in the milking parlor.)

    Both Workers: “Thanks, Bertha.”

    Enough To Make You Have Kittens

    | Bay Area, CA, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive, Pets & Animals

    (I am preparing to bring two new kittens into my home. There is a particular brand of cat food I have come to trust with my previous cat, but it is not widely stocked. A friend recommends a local pet supply store to me. I look around the store and find the adult formula of the brand, but not the kitten formula.)

    Employee: “Can I help you?”

    Me: “Do you have a particular section where you keep the kitten food?”

    Employee: “No, it’s over with the rest of the cat food. See, this one is for both adult cats and kittens.”

    Me: “Okay. I was looking for [Brand] kitten food, but all I could find was the adult formula.”

    Employee: “Our buyer isn’t in today, but I could have him special order it for you.”

    Me: “Well, I already have a bag at home. I’m getting ready to get some new kittens, and I wanted to find a closer source for this brand. The only other stores I’ve found that carry it are several miles away. I was hoping to find a place that stocks it regularly.”

    Employee: “It looks like we don’t have any, but I can talk to our buyer about it.”

    Me: “Okay. Does that mean you’ll start stocking it regularly?”

    Employee: “Well, we can special order it for you and let you know when it comes in.”

    Me: “I have a bag at home already. I just wanted to find a regular source for it.”

    Employee: “Okay. Tell you what, give me your name and number, and I’ll talk to our buyer about it.”

    Me: “Thanks.” *gives information* “Remember, I already have some, so I don’t need more right now. I just want a source that stocks it when I need more.”

    (One week later, I get a message on my answering machine.)

    Employee: “This is [Employee] calling from [Pet Store]. The bag of [Brand] kitten food you ordered has arrived.”

    Ferreting Out The Correct Information

    | Oshawa, ON, Canada | Bosses & Owners, Employees, Pets & Animals

    (I have to make an emergency vet appointment for my ferret, and as I don’t drive I am waiting for my mother to pick me up to take me there. As I’m waiting, I get a call from work.)

    Manager #1: “Hi, [My Name]. I just had someone call in sick. Would you be able to cover for them today?”

    Me: “Sorry, no; I have to take my ferret to the vet.”

    Manager #1: “All right. Thanks anyway.”

    (She hangs up. The rest is related to me when I come in a couple days later.)

    Manager #1: “[My Name] can’t come in. She said she had to take her parents to the vet.”

    Manager #2: “… You mean her ferret?”

    Manager #1: “You know, that would make a lot more sense.”

    Their Job Is For The Birds

    | Reading, England, UK | Bosses & Owners, Family & Kids, Pets & Animals

    (I work as a falconer. My sister is an auditor but loves working with the birds when she can so for Christmas I bought her an owl shaped case for her iPhone. This conversation happened at her office.)

    Manager: “That’s an odd case.”

    Sister: “Yeah. It’s an owl. My sister bought it for me.”

    Manager: “Why?”

    Sister: “She’s a falconer.”

    Manager: “She’s a falconer…”

    Sister: “Yup.”

    Manager: “So, I guess she’s got the interesting job, then.”

    Sister: “Yeah, and my younger sister is a ballerina.” *laughs*

    Manager: “And you’re an accountant…” *pauses and walks away shaking his head*


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