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  • Swearing You Into A Job
    (1,300 thumbs up)
  • Category: Bad Behavior

    Required Training, Make No Mistake About It

    , | England, UK | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (Where I work there has been a number of very stupid mistakes. Because there is no way of telling who did it, everyone has to get re-trained.)

    Me: “So to make absolutely clear, the GREEN end must be able to fit in the hole, the RED end should not be able to fit in the hole.”

    (Sighs come from the room.)

    Me: “And please do not ram it, screw it, or force it in. This is a calibrated instrument.”

    (More sighs come from the group, I see Worker #1 not even looking at me.)

    Worker #1: “This is stupid. I know how to do my job.”

    Me: “Look. I know this is obvious but some of you are just not getting it.”

    Worker #2: “Who?”

    Me: “I don’t know, and I don’t want to know. I know just how stupidly obvious this is. But training means that everyone knows how to do their job.”

    (I find out later that it was Worker #1, the person moaning and complaining the most, that was making the most mistakes. After declaring that he ‘didn’t see the point’ in doing his job correctly, he was demoted and later removed.)

    Some Coworkers Are Just Suffocating

    , | TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Health & Body, Physical

    (I am shift leader. A kitchen worker on evening shift is slightly autistic, and very claustrophobic. He is a really nice kid and a hard worker. I walk into the kitchen and see the line cooks laughing around the freezer. I go to see what’s going on.)

    Me: “Hey, what’s so funny?”

    Coworker: “Oh, we just put [Autistic Kid] in the freezer. He walked in to put the pickles up and we closed the door!”

    (Horrified I shove past them and yank the door open. He is curled up on the ground, hyperventilating.)

    Me: “[Autistic Kid], are you okay?!”

    (He just shakes his head and I take him to the front end and tell another coworker to make him a shake, and that I will pay for it. I then go back to chew out the line cooks. The manager hears me and comes around the corner.)

    Manager: “Oh, lighten up, [My Name]. It was just a harmless joke! He was fine.”

    Me: “Well, I didn’t find it funny and neither did he! He could have had a full panic attack and needed to go to the hospital! I hope you realise that he could sue you and the company for the ‘innocent joke’ you just pulled!”

    (He just scoffed and told me to go back to work. The kid quit after that day, after thanking me for saving him, and I left after another two months.)

    Only Collecting Burnt Bridges

    | OK, USA | Bad Behavior, Rude & Risque

    (My coworker has a bill collection agency that illegally calls her at work every day trying to speak with her after being told repeatedly to stop. They call for her after she has left for the day and I answer the phone.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How may I help you?”

    Collector: “I need to speak with [Coworker], please. Does she work today?”

    Me: “I’m afraid I can’t answer that for you, ma’am. If you call tomorrow between the hours of seven and three, the manager will be able to give you more information.”

    Collector: “Thank you.”

    (She hangs up. Before I can leave the phone, it rings again and the same number comes up.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How may I help you?”

    Collector: “I need to speak to [Coworker] and your manager. The last b*** I spoke to on the phone was very rude to me.”

    Me: “Uhm… Well, lady, since this is the same ‘b****’ you just got off the phone with, no. No, I don’t believe I’ll be getting anyone important to talk to you.”

    (I hang up. The phone rings again seconds later, again from the same number.)

    Me: “[Store].”

    Collector: “I need to speak to your manager.”

    (I hang up again. The phone rings a FOURTH TIME. I yell at another coworker.)

    Me: “[Coworker]! Answer it with the whorehouse!”

    Coworker: *excited* “Really?!” *he answers the phone* “[City] whorehouse. You got the dough, we got the ho!”

    (They haven’t called back since.)

    The Hostess With The Mostest

    | Grand Rapids, MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I am working as a hostess. Suddenly, a rush comes in and I have to seat many tables at once. Eventually, my hostess stand dies down and a customer I seated twenty minutes ago approaches me.)

    Customer: “Hi, I know you’re not a server, but no one has been by to see us. Can you help us?”

    Me: “I’m so sorry. I’ll try to find your server.”

    (I rush around trying to find her, but she is nowhere to be found.)

    Me: “I’m sorry. I can’t find her, but if you’re ready, I’ll take your order and have someone put it in the system for me.”

    (I take their order and go to the manager.)

    Manager: “You’re a host, you don’t take tables. Know your place.”

    Me: “They asked me to help them. No one greeted them. Can you just enter their order?”

    (For the rest of their time there, they have to come to the host stand, which is right next to their table, to ask me for refills, napkins, etc. A server never shows up. Finally, the girl who should have been serving them drops off their check and wishes them a nice day. The customer approaches me with the bill.)

    Customer: “So, that server’s name is on our check. But she didn’t do anything to help us. She won’t get our tips, will she? We want to tip you.”

    Me: “I’m really not sure, but you don’t have to do that. I was just trying to help.”

    (They insist on tipping me. Two of them tip me in cash, one leaves a hefty credit card tip, which the absent server pockets. The table asks to see a manager about the neglect and unfairness.)

    Manager: “If it’s to tell me what a good job you did, I don’t want to hear it.” *walks off*

    (Later in the day, the same server neglects another table. They flag me down just to ask what beers we have on tap. I go to the manager to ask.)

    Manager: “STOP TAKING TABLES! YOU’RE JUST A NOBODY HOSTESS!”

    (A customer from yet another table overhears and comes over.)

    Customer #2: “Yes. She is a hostess, and I wish I’d been seated closer to her stand because I’d have gotten a lot better service from her than my actual server. You should be rewarding her, not berating her for going above and beyond her position!”

    (That customer and the rest of her party get up and walk out promising to complain to corporate. The manager was demoted and I finally got promoted to a server. I did such a good job that the general manager begged me not to go when I quit a year later!)

    Unfinished Business And Out Of Business

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, New Hires

    (I am just fresh out of college, and have no work experience at all. After applying everywhere and getting nowhere, I finally get immediately hired for the human resources department in a large, well-known company. Even though it’s not my field, I’m thrilled and eager to work. However, the work itself turns out to be very dull, doing absolutely nothing for most of the time, waiting for the phone to ring, which it hardly does.)

    Me: “Hi, boss. Um… is there anything for me to do? Anything at all?”

    Boss: “Nope!”

    Me: *sadly* “I see…”

    Boss: “Hey, cheer up! Tomorrow we will have lots of work to do.”

    Me: “Really?”

    Boss: “Yeah, tomorrow we will have a job fair and I need to you interview a LOT of people.”

    Me: “Great!”

    (Over 300 applicants came to interview that day. In each interview, I had to ask a number of questions, so it took a LONG time. I was still doing the paperwork by the end of my shift.)

    Boss: “Hey, [My Name]! Time to go home.”

    Me: “But I still have to do these” *gestures to pile of paperwork*

    Boss: “No buts. Come on. I have to close the office.”

    (Reluctantly, I leave, leaving the pile of paperwork on the desk. The next morning, I arrive and sit down at my desk as usual. I look for my pile, figuring to finish it, but is nowhere. Confused, I ask my coworkers, but they haven’t taken it. My boss, and his boss, the manager, both come over to me.)

    Boss: “[My Name].”

    Me: “Yes?”

    Boss: *looking stern* “Come into my office.” *leaves*

    (I feel uneasy but I brush it off and go, knowing I haven’t done anything wrong. There, my boss is waiting for me with a familiar looking stack of papers. His boss is there, too.)

    Me: *happily* “Hey, my papers! You found them!”

    Boss: “[My Name]… you’re fired.”

    Me: “W-what? Why?”

    Boss: *waves stack* “You didn’t finish your work for the day. I found this on your desk.”

    Me: “B-but! I couldn’t finish it! I was interviewing hundreds of people. I had to go over each one!”

    Manager: “[My name], your boss and I have already discussed it. Leaving unfinished work is unacceptable here. So stop trying to change our minds, okay?! Just pack up and go. We don’t want trouble.”

    (Stunned, in shock, I turn to leave.)

    Boss: “Oh, before you leave…”

    (I turn.)

    Boss: “Sign this paper.” *hands over paper*

    (I look at it. It says basically that I am leaving at my own accord and that the company holds no responsibility over firing me. It also says that the company will never hire me again. I get angry at that.)

    Me: “Fine!”

    (I angrily sign it and grab my things and go. My coworkers are outraged and confused as I am, but say nothing. Later, I learned that since I signed that paper, I was ineligible to collect unemployment benefits. Luckily, I found another job soon after and never went back! Karma very soon came around as shortly after that company went out of business!)


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