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    Category: Extra Stupid

    Can’t Quite Pin Down That Line Of Thinking

    | Pasadena, MD, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I’m a manger in my store and every manager has their own alarm code so the company knows who turns on/off the alarm. After working nine days in a row, my brain is fried and I have forgotten my code number. After having the store manager close the store I call the alarm company to get my code.)

    Alarm Tech: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How may I help you?”

    Me: “I am calling about my alarm system.”

    Alarm Tech: “Is there a problem with the alarm?”

    Me: “Actually there’s a problem with me, I can’t seem to remember my alarm code.”

    Alarm Tech: *chuckle* “Okay, we can help with that. Now can I have your four-digit pin?”

    Me: “Um, you mean the pin for the alarm?”

    Alarm Tech: “Yes, that’s the one.”

    Me: “The alarm code I am calling to get because I don’t remember it?”

    Alarm Tech: “Yes, if you can just confirm your pin, we can continue from here.”

    Me: “You want me to give you my pin that I don’t remember, so you can then just repeat my pin number back to me?”

    Alarm Tech: *silence*

    Me: “Could you give it to another manager, who can then give it to me?”

    Alarm Tech: “I think that may be best.”

    (I hand the phone to my store manager, who gives his pin and then gives me mine. Not sure how the tech thought asking me for the pin I forgot was going to work.)

    The Drugs Don’t Work And Neither Do You

    , | Nashville, TN, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Job Seekers, Theme Of The Month

    (A woman sits down across from me at Starbucks, at an interview for a teaching position. Before I can even get a word in, she bursts out with this…)

    Woman: “Do y’all drug test? Because I can’t pass one and I don’t plan on being able to anytime soon.”

    Me: “I think we’re done here…”

    (Shortest. Interview. Ever.)

    Unsure How To Insure, Part 5

    | TX, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid

    (We left our insurance company for one month and are now going back to them with a slightly different policy. The insurance company needs proof of prior coverage from our previous insurer, which is them. But they can’t just get this from their records.)

    Me: “Let me see if I have this straight. You want me to call my previous insurer – which is you – and request that you fax me proof of my prior coverage… with you. I will then send that proof of prior coverage back to you to prove to you that we did in fact have coverage with you, 30 days ago.”

    Insurance Agent: “Yes, if you wouldn’t mind.”

    Me: “Mind? It’s awesome. I’ll be telling this story for years!”

    Related:
    Unsure How To Insure, Part 4
    Unsure How To Insure, Part 3
    Unsure How To Insure, Part 2

    Weather And Heights Don’t Mix On The Heath Cliff

    | Somerset, NJ, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Language & Words

    (I’m in line for the customer service desk when this takes place.)

    Customer: “Hi, I’m looking for a copy of Wuthering Heights.”

    Worker: “Okay.” *types on computer* “I do not see that book here.”

    Customer: “Really? That’s weird…”

    Me: “Excuse me? I think I know the book you’re looking for.”

    (The worker had typed ‘weather and heights’ instead of ‘Wuthering Heights.’ I had to spell the title out for her.)

    Geography Skills Suffering From A Tokyo Drift

    , | USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Ignoring/Inattentive, Money, Tourists & Travel

    (I’ve somehow ended up on ‘high security’ from my credit card company. As such, even though the card I carry is meant specifically for people who travel abroad frequently, I have to call in and let them know when I’m going abroad so my card will work outside of the US. I call to tell them about an upcoming trip.)

    Me: “Hi. I’m calling because I will be traveling abroad soon, and I need my card to work while traveling.”

    Representative: “We can certainly put a travel notation on your account, and your card will work in your destination. Where will you be traveling?”

    Me: “My final destination is China, but I will be transiting through Tokyo and Hong Kong on my way there. Can you set it up so that my card will work in Tokyo, Hong Kong, and mainland China during [dates]?”

    Representative: “Certainly. Please hold momentarily.” *comes back after a minute* “You’re all set for your trip.”

    (A week later in Narita airport…)

    Cashier At Restaurant: “I’m sorry, ma’am, your card was declined.”

    (Fortunately she was nice enough to let me go to an ATM and withdraw funds from my work card to pay the bill. Upon returning home, I call my bank again…)

    Me: “Yes, I called before my latest trip and specifically asked that my card be available for use in Tokyo, Hong Kong, and China. However, my card was declined in Tokyo, and the only reason I can figure is that you failed to allow use of my card in Japan. I’m not extremely upset, but I’d like to know what I can do to make sure my card works when I travel in the future.”

    Representative: “Let me check the notes… Oh. Oh, Oh… I’m so, so sorry. It appears that the previous rep didn’t understand your travel information, and left a… uh… rather unsavory note about it.”

    Me: “Are you joking? This card is for people who TRAVEL! What did she say in the note? I need a good laugh.”

    Representative: “Before I say this, I want your permission and acknowledgement that you will not hold me responsible for coarse language.”

    Me: *now chuckling* “Go ahead. I won’t be offended, and I promise you are in the clear, no matter what you say.”

    Representative: “She wrote, ‘This dumb b**** made up countries called ‘Tokyo’ and ‘Hong Kong.’ Card has been activated for use in China. Fraud alert level has been increased for any other foreign use.’ It also appears from this that your card wouldn’t have worked in Hong Kong, since our system recognizes that separately from mainland China, but if she so much as started to type Hong Kong, it would have come up… Did you also have problems in Hong Kong?”

    Me: “No, I didn’t try to use my card there since I was only in that airport for a few minutes before traveling on. Thanks for the laugh. Buy that ‘b****’ a map, would you?”

    Representative: “We have noted your comment, and I’m sure the issue will be dealt with promptly.”

    (And I now make sure to name the *country* every time I call in. Silly me for thinking that most people would know Tokyo is in Japan and that Hong Kong is a real place…or ask if they didn’t.)


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