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    Category: Extra Stupid

    Dying To Get The Job

    | Kirkland, WA, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, New Hires

    (I’ve recently interviewed at a local wholesaler for a position on their order and delivery team. Despite being told they would be in touch with me the following day to let me know when I could begin training, I haven’t heard anything from them for over a week so I give them a call.)

    Me: “Yes, hello. I wanted to check in again about the position I applied for. You were supposed to call me back, like, six days ago.”

    Employee: “Really? Let me check with the hiring manager.”

    (I get put on hold for several minutes. When the employee gets back he sounds noticeably uneasy.)

    Employee: “Okay. So, I don’t quite know how to say this, but apparently the hiring manager threw out your application.”

    Me: “What!? Why? You made it pretty clear I had the job when I last spoke with you!”

    Employee: “Well, here’s the thing: after that, he read in the obituary column of the local paper that someone with the same name as you passed away recently. He thought it was you and therefore decided to toss out your papers.”

    Me: *stunned* “Umm… Well, is there a way I could correct that? I mean, seeing as we’re conversing, I’m obviously not dead!”

    Employee: “I’d advise you to come in again and meet him face to face. He’s still not entirely convinced this isn’t some sort of prank.”

    (I did go back in and managed to give the hiring manager quite a shock when he stepped out of his office to see me looking alive and well. Even better? I checked the obituaries afterwards and found the guy who’d passed away was clearly stated to be in his 90s – I just barely turned 30. The manager had no explanation for why he thought a geriatric was applying for such a physically demanding position.)

    A Dangerous Mis-Steak

    | IN, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (My family and I are ordering at a steakhouse. I have a potato allergy and I was inquiring about non-potato sides.)

    Me: “What sides do you offer that are not potatoes? I don’t see them listed on the menu.”

    Server: “Well we have steamed veggies, applesauce, steak fries, cheese sticks—”

    Me: “Steak fries are potatoes.”

    Server: “Um, no they are not. I work here. I know.”

    Me: “Uh huh… What are regular fries made of?”

    Server: “Potatoes.”

    Me: “And curly?”

    Server: “Potatoes.”

    Me: “And steak fries are not?”

    Server: *there is a long pause as you can hear the gears turning in her head* “No.”

    Me: “Okay. Well, I will have the applesauce.”

    (She left and we all cracked up. When she came back out she apologized and said she asked the cook. She had assumed they were strips of steak.)

    Managed To Come To A Conclusion

    | Dayton, OH, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid

    (My mom and dad are currently shopping at a store where my uncle is a manager. My dad and my uncle have heard all their lives that they look very much alike)

    Saleswoman: *does a double take at my dad* “Wow! Sorry, you look just like my manager!”

    My Mom: *laughing* “Yeah, there’s a reason for that!”

    Saleswoman: *completely serious* “Why, are you a manager, too?”

    Flights Of Fancy

    | South Africa | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Geography, Tourists & Travel, Transportation

    (I am a pilot. On this particular overseas flight, a very common route, about 90% of the flight is over the ocean. An air hostess comes in with my breakfast.)

    Hostess: “Good morning. Ooh, it’s quite bright in here, isn’t it?”

    Me: “Yeah. Good weather today.”

    Hostess: *leaning over to look out of the cockpit window* “Oh, wow, we’re over the ocean!”

    (She puts down my breakfast and leaves the cockpit. My co-pilot and I look at each other.)

    Co-Pilot: “Did she just say what I think she said?”

    Me: “Yeah. For a moment I wasn’t sure I heard that right, either. If we weren’t over the ocean, I would be seriously concerned about where we were going to end up!”

    It’s Sickening The Lengths Some Will Go To

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Liars/Scammers, Top

    (My coworker and I are on a break.)

    Me: “I am missing my cousin’s engagement party tonight.”

    Coworker: “Why didn’t you put in for the night off?”

    Me: “Mum forgot to give me the invite until it was too late.”

    Coworker:  ”You should have just called in sick. I do it all the time when I have a party to go to.”

    (Two days later, I am working with a different coworker.)

    Me:  ”I thought I was working with [Coworker] tonight?”

    Coworker #2: “Didn’t you hear?”

    Me:  ”About what?”

    Coworker #2: “She called in sick last night so she could go to [Boyfriend]’s work party.”

    Me: “Um, doesn’t [Boyfriend] work for our security department?”

    Coworker #2: “Yes, the party was here as well and with all the bosses in attendance, the idiot was fired on the spot and escorted off the premises.”


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