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  • Category: Extra Stupid

    There’s Many A Slip Twixt Cup And Lip

    | Canada | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Musical Mayhem

    (I work in a theatre group. While most of my coworkers are great, there is one that seems to be a bit of an airhead. On this day, I’m waiting with her in a dressing room. There’s a supply of clear plastic cups in the room for drinking water, and sound from the stage is being piped in.)

    Coworker: “I’m going to practice my routine, okay?”

    Me: “Sure. I’m on soon. I’ll be back after my scene is done.”

    (After I do my scene, I come back to find the girl doing the ‘cups’ rhythm to ‘When I’m Gone’ by Anna Kendrick. The cup breaks part way through the pattern. She throws it out and goes to get another cup. To my chagrin, there are several other broken cups in the trash.)

    Me: “Wait a minute. How many times have you done that?”

    Coworker: “Five… six… I don’t know.”

    Me: “And how many times has the cup broken?”

    Coworker: “All of them. Why?”

    Me: “Two things. First, those cups are meant to be for drinking, not playing with. If the cup breaks every time, it’s probably not strong enough to be hit so many times.”

    Coworker: *clearly not getting it* “I see…”

    Me: “And second, if you’d been paying attention to the speaker instead of your cup-flipping skills, you would know your scene is coming up in just a couple minutes.)

    (The girl ran to the backstage area, shocked. Something told me she’s not cut out to be an actress.)

    Might Have To Repeat What They Just Said

    | Kamloops, BC, Canada | Coworkers, Extra Stupid

    (They have sent one of the dumber servers into the dish pit to help us catch up with the dishes. At one point, I hear the following:)

    Server: “If they come out dirty, do we have to send them through again?”

    World Wide Watery Web

    , | New York, NY, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I’m on the phone, trying to resolve an issue where the cable company has mistakenly logged my account as disconnected.)

    Me: “I’m a little confused. The e-mail I received from you says that my account was disconnected, but I still have cable service.”

    Employee: “Well, that can’t be possible. You are disconnected. A technician went out to your residence and physically disconnected the lines yesterday.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I don’t think you’re understanding me. That didn’t happen. My cable and internet are still working. The lines have NOT been disconnected. If you have my account categorized as disconnected, why am I still receiving cable service?”

    Employee: “Well, there may just be some leftover service in the lines. That will get less and less strong as it finishes out and gets used up. That happens sometimes.”

    Me: “Leftover service in the lines? Like water in a pipe?”

    Employee: “Exactly like that. There is just leftover cable and internet in the lines. It’ll run out soon.”

    Me: “You do realize that cable and internet are not physical things that flow through a line, right?”

    Employee: “No, I don’t think that’s correct. The service goes through the wires and into your home, just like water through a pipe. You just have some leftover service in your wires.”

    Me: “… Can I speak to your supervisor?”

    Two Of A Kind

    , | IA, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science

    (We are at the drive thru.)

    Employee: “Can I take your order, sir?”

    Me: “Do you have sliders?”

    Employee: “Yes, we do. How many would you like?”

    Me: “I really don’t feel like six and two isn’t enough. Can I buy four?”

    Employee: “No, sir. We only sell siders in six packs or two packs.”

    Me: “Okay. Please get me four burgers.”

    Employee: “Sir, would you like the two-pack or six-pack?”

    Me: “I’d like four sliders please.”

    Employee: “We only sell sliders in two packs or six packs.”

    Me: “Okay. No problem. Just give me four sliders.”

    Employee: “You don’t understand, sir. You get two burgers with the two pack and six burgers with the six pack. You can’t order four.”

    Me: “Okay, well can you order me two two-packs?”

    (There is a long pause.)

    Employee: “Oh!”

    Me: “Thank you.”

    Employee: “That will be two, two-pack sliders. Correct?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    (After picking up the order and pulling away from the ‘pick-up’ window, I quickly realize the bag is light. Looking inside, I see only two burgers. I go back to the window)

    Employee: “Sir, can I help you?”

    Me: “Yes. There’s only two sliders in my bag. I ordered four.”

    Employee: “Let me check the screen. Your order only says ‘two.’”

    Me: “That means two, two-packs of sliders.”

    (There is a long pause.)

    Employee: “Oh!”

    Can’t Be Any Clearer Than Black And White

    , | Warrington, England, UK | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    Me: “White coffee, please.”

    Server: “We haven’t got any white coffee. I do have some black coffee and some milk if that is okay?”

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