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    Category: Extra Stupid

    Out Of State, Out Of Mind

    | Los Angeles, CA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Geography

    (My husband and I are from Australia.)

    Cashier: “Where are you guys from?”

    Me: “Oh, we are from Australia!”

    Cashier: “Oh? Where is that?”

    My Husband: *a bit shocked* “It’s over near Asia, in the Pacific Ocean. It’s a country called Australia.”

    Cashier: “Oh, I’m not real familiar with my US states. What state is it next to?”

    Me: *gobsmacked* “Erm, it’s a country, not in the USA.”

    Cashier: “Oh, okay.”

    On The Lower Fish Scales Of Intelligence

    | Bristol, England, UK | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals

    (I am keeping an eye on the new guy on the meat and fish counter when I overhear this conversation:)

    Him: “So all the fish swim the same way, right?”

    Coworker: “What?”

    Him: “Well, they’d have to, right? Or the world’s oceans would spin.”

    (He wasn’t joking.)

    Doesn’t Have The Language For The Shapes

    | England, UK | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Language & Words

    (In our workplace we do various jobs, one of which involves putting metal letters together for stamping initials onto leather. This colleague isn’t known for his intelligence…)

    Colleague: “I hate doing that job.”

    Other Colleague: “Really? Why?”

    Colleague: “I just can’t deal with all the shapes man.”

    Other Colleague: “What shapes?”

    Colleague: “All the ‘A’s and the ‘B’s and ‘M’s and that. It’s just too much for me.”

    On His Own Little Island

    | CA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Geography

    (I’m returning from a dog show and driving a 28′ motor home filled with dogs. I’m on a highway next to the Salton Sea in southern CA when I approach a border patrol checkpoint. It should be noted that I’m white with straight blond hair and have blue eyes and am of northern European stock.)

    Patrol Agent: “Buenos dias, senorita.” *and then continues in Spanish, which I do not understand*

    Me: “Good afternoon, officer.”

    (The officer looks me over, and tries to look into the RV.)

    Patrol Agent: “Where are you coming from and going to?”

    Me: “I was showing dogs in Mexicalli, and now I’m headed home.”

    Patrol Agent: “Where were you born?”

    Me: “I was born in Rhode Island.”

    Patrol Agent: “What country is that?”

    Me: *kind of give him a look* “…It’s one of the 48 contiguous states.”

    Patrol Agent: “There’s 50 states in the United States!”

    Me: “I said ‘contiguous.’”

    (He looked at me confused, so I asked to see his supervising officer. Apparently a BORDER PATROL OFFICER had no idea that Rhode Island is a state!)

    Her Brain Is A Void

    | USA | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Extra Stupid

    (I work at a convenience store that accepts electronic checks. Before going electronic, the registers would endorse the check and they would go in our cash drawers. Now, the checks get processed electronically. The register scans and accepts the check as payment, then we flip it over to the written side and the word ‘void’ is printed on it before being handed back to the customer. The money comes out of the customer’s account, and they get the now-voided check back to prevent reuse or fraud. I ask my manager about some rumors I’d heard about a coworker having a problem with the electronic checks.)

    Me: “Hey, [Manager], what happened with [Coworker] and somebody’s check?”

    Manager: “Oh, my god. This lady’s check wouldn’t process electronically. So she just wrote ‘void’ on it and gave it back to her.”

    Me: “She VOIDED it!?”

    (Instead of putting the check in her drawer like we used to, she voided it and sent the customer on their way with more than $70 worth of stuff. For free. My coworker had to pay that back herself. We still shake our heads at that stroke of genius!)

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