• A Very Therapeutic Solution - 760 votes
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    Category: Extra Stupid

    Use Your Head(ache)

    | Australia | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Health & Body

    (I have a massive headache. My manager tells me to go to the office to get some of the painkillers from the first aid box. I am in my late 30s; the office girl is in her late teens.)

    Me: “Hi, [Coworker], could you please give me a [Brand Painkiller], please?”

    Coworker: “Uh, no, I can’t.”

    Me: “Oh, [Manager] said there were some in the first aid box.”

    Coworker:  “Yes, I know. There are.”

    Me: “So can I have two, please?”

    Coworker:  “No, I’m not allowed to give you any.”

    Me:  “Why not?”

    Coworker: “You might be allergic to them.”

    Me: “I’m not allergic to them.”

    Coworker: “How do you know you aren’t allergic to them?”

    Me:  “Because I’ve used that brand for 30 years and I asked for them by name.”

    Coworker: “Well, I can’t give them out legally; I could be sued if you are.”

    Me: “So if you can’t give them out, why have them in the first aid box?”

    Coworker: “Just in case someone has a headache.”

    (At that stage I thought that smashing my head against the brick wall might make my head feel better.)

    A Bit Light On Common Sense

    | ON, Canada | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    Order Taker: “Hi, can I take your order?”

    Me: “Yes, I’d like a chicken sandwich meal with root beer, light mayo, please.”

    Order Taker: “I’m sorry; I think we only have one kind of mayo.”

    (At this point, I decide it’s easiest to agree with her.)

    Me: “Okay. In that case, can I get the sandwich with just a little bit of mayo.”

    Order Taker: “Oh! Okay. Yeah, we can do that.”

    Only Seasoned Staff Know The Seasoning

    | Fargo, ND, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I am picking up a pizza for carryout.)

    Manager: “Your total will be $[total]”

    Employee: “Hey, boss! Which one of these goes on the bread sticks?”

    (The employee is holding two different containers. One is labeled “Bread stick seasoning”)

    Manager: “That one. The one that says… bread sticks on it.”

    Employee: “Thanks, boss!” *goes back to food prep*

    Manager: “I… can’t believe I was just asked that question.”

    Rounding Up Versus Dumbing Down

    | Portland, OR, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Money

    (My store is raising money for a charity and competing with other stores in the same franchise. Every cashier is supposed to ask each customer if they want to donate a dollar, but the customers aren’t really biting. Eventually I get an idea.)

    Me: “Would you like to round your purchase up to the next dollar to donate to [Charity]?”

    Customer: “Oh, sure!”

    (It goes like this for a while. Sometimes customers even donate more than a dollar out of generosity. According to the posters in the break rooms, using this strategy our store winds up in the lead. One day my manager pulls me aside.)

    Manager: “Are you the one having customers round their purchases up?”

    Me: “Yeah.” *expecting him to comment on how clever it was*

    Manager: “You need to stop. The numbers aren’t round.”

    Me: “…but we’re in the lead. And we’re doing this for charity.”

    Manager: “A round dollar amount looks better.”

    (Predictably, going back to asking customers if they want to donate a dollar didn’t work. But at least the numbers looked nice!)

    A Bit More Than A Mix-Up

    | Alexandria, VA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I ordered a couple pizzas and told them I had a coupon. When the delivery guy arrived I looked at the receipt.)

    Me: “$95.30…? No way am I signing this! It should be $25!”

    Delivery Guy: “What?”

    (He looks and then calls his boss. He talks outside for a while, then comes back in and hands me his cell.)

    Manager: “Hi, sorry about that. Can you write a tip on the back, and then I’ll fix everything when the delivery guy gets back.”

    Me: “Um, okay. Please get this taken care of.”

    (I bring up my credit card statement 20 minutes later and see that the $95 is pending, along with another $35 charge. I decide to call the store.)

    Me: “Hey, I am the guy who you guys charged $95. I noticed it is still high. It should be $25.”

    Manager: “Oh, yes, sorry about that. The guy who rang you up is new and gets 9’s and 2’s mixed up. Please hold for a sec.”

    (She then hands the phone to whatever poor soul rang me up.)

    Employee: “Sorry. I get 2’s and 9’s mixed up.”

    (I and friends all face-palm.)

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