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  • September's Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    Category: Coworkers

    Lack Of Con-Text And Lack Of Management

    | Columbus, OH, USA | Coworkers, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’ve just transferred to a new location, but I’ve been with this company for two and a half years, meaning I have far more experience than most of my coworkers. I am having some trouble adjusting to the laziness of this new crew, as I have come from a store where the crew is tight-knit and always on task. This happens during a rush with a line in the store and a line in the drive-thru. My bar support has just hurt himself and had to leave the floor, leaving me, one barista on the window, and one barista at the front. I have been answering the drive-thru when my coworker doesn’t, which is nearly every time.)

    Me: “Thanks for choosing [Company]. What can I get for you?”

    Customer: *rattles off large order* “…and do you have any chocolate chip cookies left?”

    Me: “I’m not sure; let me check on that for you.” *turns off headset and yells to coworker* “Do we have any chocolate chip cookies left?”

    Coworker: *silent*

    Me: *while working my way frantically through a line of 20+ drinks* “[Coworker]! Do we have any chocolate chip cookies?” *I look up to see she is texting and ignoring me*

    Coworker #2: *calls to me while working with a line of customers at the front* “No, we’re out of chocolate chip.”

    Me: *back on the headset* “I’m so sorry, we’re out of chocolate chip. Could I get you oatmeal?”

    Customer: “No, my kids hate oatmeal. Do you have brownies?”

    Me: “Let me check for you.” *turns off headset* “[Coworker], please check if we have brownies.”

    (My coworker is still ignoring me and texting with a line of drinks sitting and waiting to be passed out to the customers at the window.)

    Me: “[COWORKER]! Seriously?! I can’t take the orders, check the pastries, make the drinks, AND pass the drinks out! YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING TOO!”

    (My coworker bursts into tears and runs to the back, leaving me and Coworker #2 to deal with this mess. Later, after the whole ordeal is finished and we’ve finally gotten all the customers taken care of (and half the drinks given away for free because of wait times), Coworker emerges back out onto the floor and shoot a smug look at me. Moments later, I am called to the back by the manager.)

    Me: “Hey, [Manager], what’s up? You needed to see me?”

    Manager: “[Coworker] said you screamed at her on the floor when she was working as hard as she could. She also said you called her lazy and worthless.”

    Me: “Honestly? I did yell at her, but I never called her lazy or worthless. We were in the middle of a massive rush and she was texting and ignoring everything I was asking her. She wasn’t even taking orders! I yelled that she needed to help me, because I was already way behind.”

    Manager: “Well, you need to apologize to her. I won’t write you up this time. But you need to remember you’re a team.”

    Me: “…Seriously?”

    (I started looking for a new job that day.)

    A Silent Cry For Attention

    | USA | Coworkers, Food & Drink

    Coworker #1: “Yawning at your desk again?”

    Me: “I call it a silent scream that indicates I need more coffee to function.”

    Coworker #2: “I am going to call yawns “silent screams for coffee” from now on.”

    Couldn’t Miss The Opportunity

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Coworkers

    (A coworker I was never very fond of is leaving the company. When she comes around to say goodbyes, my snark gets the best of me…)

    Coworker: “You’ll miss me when I’m gone.”

    Me: “Only one way to find out.”

    A Raw Complaint

    | SC, USA | Coworkers, Food & Drink

    (I’m in the soda aisle, reaching back into the shelf to find a can of a particular brand, when I notice something terribly out of place. Nestled between the cans is a small packet of raw hamburger meat from the meat section. Even worse, it’s open, and starting to change colors. Naturally, I react with surprise and disgust.)

    Me: “Oh, ew! Ewwww, ew, ew, there’s raw meat in there!”

    (As I say this, an employee happens by.)

    Employee: “What?! Raw meat?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, and it’s open.”

    Employee: “Oh, gross! [Coworker]!”

    Coworker: ” What?”

    Employee: “She just found raw meat in the drink shelf!”

    Coworker: “I didn’t put it there. ”

    Employee: “Raw. Meat.”

    Coworker: “So get maintenance to look at it.” *pause* “Wait a second, did you say raw meat?!”

    (She walks over and tiptoes to look into the shelf where the open meat is. As I’m leaving, I hear her shout:)

    Coworker: “Oh, ew! Ewwwww! There’s a bite taken out of this!”

    Not Determined On Terminology

    | The Netherlands | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Language & Words, Technology

    (I’m presenting a user interface design to my team.)

    Developer: *pointing at imagery* “So, this is an overlayer?”

    Me: “That’s an overlay, or a modal screen, indeed.”

    Developer: “Ah, so, an overlayer.”

    Me: “It’s overlay, not overlayer.”

    Developer: “No, it’s overlayer.”

    Me: “Overlayer sounds like a combination of overlay and layer to me. ‘Overlay’ is a word, and a ‘layer’ is a Photoshop term. Overlayer is not commonly used in this field. Just call it an overlay, or modal.”

    Developer: “Whatever, it’s just an overlayer to me.”

    Me: “Can we just stick to one word to avoid confusion? Overlay is the right word for it. Just use it.”

    Developer: “It’s overlayer.”

    Me: *facepalm*

    (This provided for a lot of confusion in the following meetings with team members, managers, and even stakeholders. The same happened for ‘throbber’, which is a little-known, but short and simple word for ‘thingy that spins when you are waiting for something to load’ – the term they insisted on using…)


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