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    Category: Coworkers

    Delta Uniform Mike Bravo

    | Kent, England, UK | Coworkers, Language & Words

    (Two of my coworkers have decided to learn the phonetic alphabet and are looking at a website with a list on it.)

    Coworker #1: “Why is Z ‘zulu’? It doesn’t make sense!”

    Coworker #2: “Yeah, it would be better if it was zebra.”

    Coworker #1: “Or xylophone!”

    Me: “… Xylophone starts with an ‘X.’”

    Coworker #1: “Oh, yeah…”

    The New White-Bread America

    | Cincinnati, OH, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I like to bake and I often make home-made bread. I like to make a loaf or two on the weekends and then I have bread for toast all week. I’ve done it for years. But at one office where I worked, I’d come in early and eat my toast in the employee lunch room and one coworker would force me into this conversation almost daily.)

    Coworker: “Where did you get that bread?”

    Me: “I made it.”

    Coworker: “Oh, do you have a bread machine?”

    Me: “Nope, made it without one.”

    Coworker: “That’s not possible. You HAVE TO have a bread machine to make bread.”

    Me: “How do you think your grandmother made bread before they invented bread machines?”

    Coworker: *deer in headlights look*

    (This went on over and over because she simply refused to believe it was possible for someone to make bread without using a bread machine.)

    Very Fond(le) Of Our Customers

    | WI, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers

    (My store’s dress code prohibits visible tattoos. I have a large tattoo on my back. One day, I come into the store on my day off. I am wearing a shirt with a cut out, making my tattoo visible. My coworker, who has many tattoos, comes up behind me and moves my hair out of the way to look at my tattoo. A customer walks up to the registers and gives her a weird look when she does that.)

    Coworker: *to customer* “She works here. I just never get to see her tattoo because we have to keep them covered.”

    Me: “No, she’s just fondling random customers.”

    Don’t Want To Cause A Latte Trouble

    | MA, USA | Bad Behavior, Coworkers, Food & Drink

    (I am the customer in this situation. My husband orders us each a caramel iced latte. He comes back to the car from the store. He has got his order right and mine is wrong. It was a small, hot coffee that wasn’t marked ‘caramel.’ I thought maybe they had given him someone else’s order by mistake and he was too nice to fix it, so I go back in with the drink and the receipt, that says two iced caramel lattes.)

    Me: “Hi, I’m sorry, but I think my husband got the wrong order? I just wanted to make sure I didn’t get someone else’s coffee.”

    Employee #1: “Uh… [Employee #2], what do I do?”

    Employee #2: “Make her the right drink this time! Jesus, [Employee #1], that’s the third time today. At least this one is nicer than the last guy.”

    Me: “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to cause trouble. Really.”

    (My new drink is made in record time, and I’m not charged extra for it.)

    Employee #1: “It’s okay. I’ve been here a month and I should know what I’m doing, but I’m still new and I still mess up. I just don’t want to get fired. Thank you for the tip. Seriously. Have a nice day, and I’m sorry I messed up your drink.”

    (All the change I brought into the store with me in case I had to purchase my drink again was put in the tip jar that the employees share, and both the employees thanked me profusely. Seriously, coffee shop workers need to be cut some slack!)

    Has Pinot Comment

    | Auckland, New Zealand | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Top

    (I am taking registrations for a members-only conference when I receive the following email at 10 am:)

    Manager: *cc-ing in the company director* “[Customer] emailed you regarding his conference registration and has informed me you have not responded. Please explain why you have not responded and contact him immediately.”

    Me: *also cc-ing in the company director* “[Customer] emailed me at 8:17 pm last night. I did not respond because at that time I was at home, drinking a particularly good Pinot Noir and watching a movie. I did however respond to [Customer] at 7:37 am this morning. For your information my office hours are 8:00 am to 4:00 pm, Monday to Friday.”

    Manager: *no response*

    Company Director: *replying to all* “Pleased to see you at work early. What was the Pinot?”


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