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    Category: Employees

    No Sign That They Read The Sign

    | TX, USA | Employees, Food & Drink

    (There is a blanket-term for my local eateries’ signature dishes, named after the founder’s daughter. More than once, if we order exactly as it’s phrased on the menu, we’re given blank looks and told the item doesn’t exist.)

    Me: “I’d like a [Signature Dessert] Shake.”

    Employee: “We don’t have a [Signature Dessert] shake. We have [Signature Dessert], but no shake of it.”

    (The employee was standing under the sign that said “[Signature Dessert] shake,” and if you looked over at the end of the counter, there was a five-foot-tall advertising banner that used the exact same phrasing. This sadly happened with other menu items with regularity at this location.)

    Locked Up In The Tower Of London

    | London, England, UK | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Tourists & Travel

    (I am on a study abroad trip in England and am at the Tower of London on a Saturday. My friend and I are heading towards the exit since the Tower is closing.)

    Guard: *sticks her head inside the bathroom* “Is anyone in here?”

    (She then slams the gate in the bathroom doorway shut.)

    Me: *smiling* “I hope the answer was no!”

    (The guard looks at me for a moment then…)

    Guard: “Tough!”

    Can’t Think Outside The Box

    | CA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I go into our local serve-yourself bakery to buy muffins for some staff meetings. I needed two dozen, but because the meetings are spaced throughout the day, I pack eight muffins into three different boxes.  I get up to the register to pay and the clerk tries to charge me for three dozen.)

    Me: “I only have two dozen.”

    Clerk: “But you have three boxes so it’s three dozen.”

    Me: “Yes, I have three boxes, but there are only eight in each box which equals two dozen.

    Clerk: “Nope. Three boxes equals three dozen.”

    (After going round and round with her several times, I ask for the manager. She goes into the back to get him and as soon as he comes out, he says without even looking:)

    Manager: “Three boxes is three-dozen.”

    (I put the boxes on the counter and walked out. I ended up at my local supermarket where I bought two dozen donuts in three boxes without any problems.)

    Sales Fails

    | Yorkshire, England, UK | Bizarre/Silly, Employees

    (My boyfriend and I briefly visit a popular electronics chain to pass some time whilst we wait for a bus. We don’t want to buy anything, and are just looking at laptops.)

    Salesperson: “Hey, guys, need any help?”

    Boyfriend: “No, we’re fine thanks. Just looking.”

    (We turn to the other side of the aisle and look at tablets. The same salesman sidles up to my boyfriend.)

    Salesperson: “You wanna buy a [Brand], mate?”

    Boyfriend: “Er… no, I don’t, thanks. I’m just looking. I’d be more likely to get something like this [gestures at tablet].”

    Salesperson: “Oh, well, the [Brand]’s the best thing, so that’s what you want to get.”

    (My boyfriend gives him a polite smile.)

    Salesperson: “Yeah, I’m a salesman, but I’m not a very good one.”

    Cardi-gonna Get You In Trouble

    | Kent, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Employees

    (I’m browsing, with my mum and little sister, in a local charity shop that supports a well-known research company. It’s the height of summer, and said sister is wearing a cardigan because she is self-conscious whilst outside in public.)

    Mum: *to sister* “Hey, [Sister], there are some nice dresses over here that you might like.”

    (I’m over the other side of the shop browsing their book collection. There is currently one member of staff in the shop, manning the till, but currently doing nothing.)

    Sister: *moans* “Mum, it’s hot in here.”

    Mum: “Okay, hun. Put it in my bag for the meanwhile.”

    (Then, the middle-aged staff member appears right behind them both.)

    Employee: *narrows eyes* “Excuse me, ma’am, but we do not tolerate your kind in here.”

    Mum: *baffled* “…I’m sorry?”

    Employee: “Don’t pretend you don’t know!”

    Mum: *exasperated* “No, I don’t know! What are you talking about?!”

    (The employee looks at my sister, bends down slightly and tuts at her.)

    Employee: “It’s a shame your generation are this way.” *to herself* She should know better.”

    (By now I can see my mum is kind of losing it and my sister is tearful. I intervene.)

    Me: “Pardon me, ma’am, but don’t you think it’s unfair to make an accusation of someone without actually telling them what is it they’re being accused of?”

    Employee: *sighs dramatically* “Oh, all right then.” *points menacingly at sister* “I saw her put one of our cardigans in that bag! Stealing!”

    Mum: “That was hers! She came in wearing it!”

    Employee: *scoffs* “Yeah, pull the other one.”

    (I pull the cardigan from Mum’s bag and show the label to the rude employee.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I’ve worked in charity shops before, and they tag clothes just like any other store you’ll find. There is no tag on this cardigan!”

    Employee: “She could have taken it off!”

    Me: “But this cardigan is [well-known Brand name] and you don’t even sell that kind of label here!”

    Employee: “Hmph. Well, rest assured, I’ll be speaking to my manager about this.”

    (As we swiftly removed ourselves from the shop, the woman was wagging her finger at us from the large window display. Later, we called the manager before the employee did, and got a profuse apology. The employee was also fired for her appalling treatment of customers.)


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