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    Category: Employees

    Instructions Aren’t So Clear

    | Chattanooga, TN, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (While we’re being checked out, an item buzzes. The register clearly displays the error, ‘BUFFER FULL – PRESS CLEAR.’)

    Cashier: “Huh. This isn’t working.”

    (She slowly reads the message, then ignores it and tries again without pressing clear. Same buzz, same error. So she tries again. And again. And again.)

    Wife: “It’s saying, ‘Buffer full – press clear.'”

    Cashier: “Yeah, that happens sometimes. Don’t worry, it’ll take.”

    (She tries it again. And again. And again.)

    Me: “You know, maybe just in case it helps, try pressing clear?”

    (She does. The error message goes away. The item rings up just fine.)

    Cashier: “Huh. He’s pretty bright, for a gentleman.”

    Wife: *under her breath* “Yeah, he’s been reading for years now…”

    Death Defying Colors

    | Victoria, BC, Canada | Employees, Language & Words

    (Two women approach my till.)

    Woman: “Do you have books on dying and grieving?”

    Me: “Yes, of course. Right this way.”

    (I take her and her friend to our psychology section where at the top there are books on death and dying. The women look at each other awkwardly.)

    Woman: “Umm… we said dyeing and weaving.”

    (I promptly took them to our crafts section, apologizing the whole way!)

    Not Quite The Cream (Soda) Of The Crop

    , | Adelaide, SA, Australia | Bad Behavior, Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (My mother and I go to the drive-thru to get a particular brand of drink that isn’t sold at many of the fast food chains. I wouldn’t call it an unusual drink but it’s not the brand’s most popular flavour.)

    Mum: “Can I have two brown cream sodas?”

    Cashier: “That’s not a thing. We don’t sell that here.”

    Mum: “But we buy it here all the time.”

    Cashier: “We don’t sell that. Ee only have sarsaparilla. I don’t know why you’re asking for that. It just sounds weird.”

    Mum: “Go talk to the other cashier, currently making coffees. He’s sold it to me before.”

    (The cashier looks at him and back at us, she does not move.)

    Me: “Look at the fridge. I can see it from here. It’s next to the sarsaparilla.”

    Cashier: “I don’t know why you want this weird drink.”

    Mum: “Look, why don’t you just go over and have a look.”

    (Lo and behold, the drinks are there. She picks them up and takes them to the register.)

    Cashier: “I don’t know why it’s called brown; this drink is weird.”

    (We paid and left, still bewildered at what she had said. For the record, it’s called brown because it is brown.)

    Not An Apples To Apples World Anymore

    | Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I’m buying some fruit, and I’ve brought my own re-usable cloth bags.)

    Cashier: *stares blankly into my bag, which contains Macintosh apples*

    Bagger: “What’s the matter?”

    Cashier: “I’ve never seen anything like this before.”

    Bagger: “The cloth bags? Yeah, they’re not that common.”

    Cashier: “No, man. These APPLES, man! What the heck are they? I’ve never seen apples like these in my life.”

    Bagger: “Uh, they’re Macintoshes. We sell a lot of those.”

    Cashier: *shaking his head* “There are so many different types of apples, man, and I can’t keep up.”

    Hobson’s Sandwiches

    | Cape Coral, FL, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I am a Canadian tourist on vacation.)

    Subshop Worker: “Hi, welcome to [Sandwich Shop]. What can I get you?”

    Me: “Hi, I’ll get a foot-long meatball sub.”

    Subshop Worker: “Sorry, we don’t have meatballs right now.”

    Me: “Umm… Okay, I’ll get a foot-long cold cut.”

    Subshop Worker: “What bread?”

    Me: “Italian herbs and cheese.”

    Subshop Worker: “We only have Italian right now.”

    Me: “Then Italian it is I guess.”

    Subshop Worker: “What cheese?”

    Me: *annoyed from my first two issues where he asked instead of informing me they were out* “Swiss.”

    Subshop Worker: “We only have provolone right now.”

    Me: “Do I really have a choice?!”

    (I finished my order with no more problems until a casual conversation started as to where I was from. He then had the nerve to insult the Canadian Health Care system!)


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