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    Category: Employees

    The Answer Is Black Or White House

    | NY, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Employees, Politics

    (In the 1950s my grandmother took a boat from the UK to New York. Of course she had to answer questions to get through security.)

    Security: “Do you have plans to blow up the White House, madam?”

    Grandmother: “Oh, why? Is it an option?”

    Security: “Try again, madam.”

    Deaf-Defying Behavior

    | Port Aransas, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Employees, Family & Kids

    (I was born deaf. The hotel we are staying for our annual family reunion at the beach has a ‘no running’ rule, and the front desk woman comes out and yells at me, even though I wasn’t running. My dad is also at the pool, resting.)

    Me: *jumps into pool*

    Woman: *walks out to pool* “YOU! How DARE you do that! We have rules. We could kick you out! In fact, I see the manager coming over right now!”

    Dad: “Hey, knock it off! She wasn’t running, and she’s deaf. So quit being so rude and get the stick outta your a**.”

    Woman: *shocked and outraged face* “You liar! You should pay attention to your kid, and be an actual PARENT.” *walks off angrily*

    Me: *in sign* “What just happened?”

    Dad: “Not really sure. I’ll tell you later.”

    (Later that night.)

    Me: *walks past front desk with sister and cousins, talking with them*

    Woman: “I knew it! You’re not deaf. I can hear you talking. I know for a fact deaf people can’t talk!”

    Me: *rolls eyes* “Just because I can talk doesn’t mean I’m not deaf. And just because you can talk doesn’t mean you can say stupid things.” *takes off my cochlear implant, shows her*

    Woman: *gives me a glare full of hatred*

    Me: *smiles sweetly, put implant back on, calls her bitch in sign language, and turns to relatives*

    Woman: “WHAT DID YOU SAY?”

    Me: “Have a good night! Or is that what you’re supposed to say to your guests?” *walks away*

    Should Have Been Childs-Play

    | Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Employees, Family & Kids, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (This story takes place a few years ago, when my eldest child was only a few months old. I have just returned to work, and my husband is out of the state at a conference. I am picking my daughter up from her childcare centre, and am still nervous about leaving her for the day. I arrive to find a carer locking the main gate.)

    Me: “Oh, my god! What are you doing? My baby’s in there!”

    Carer: “Excuse me, ma’am, but all children have been picked up all ready. I’m locking up.”

    (I’m obviously extremely distressed by this.)

    Me: “Please, my daughter! You have to let me in!”

    Carer: “Please step back, ma’am. All children have been picked up. You need to calm down.”

    Me: “But I haven’t picked her up yet! She’s still here. Let me in!”

    Carer: “Your husband probably picked her up and forgot to tell you. It’s not my fault. Take it up with him.”

    (By this point I am in tears and screaming.)

    Me: “My husband’s out of the state. Either let me in or I’m calling the police.”

    (The carer eventually let me in, and, surprise, surprise, we found my daughter sitting in the playroom, perfectly happy on her own. Needless to say, I never left her there again.)

    Not Getting Carried Away With Customer Service

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (It is just before Christmas and I’m heavily pregnant. I’ve also injured myself to the point where I need a cane to walk. I’ve ordered all my shopping online to avoid unnecessary travel. This occurs when the delivery guy shows up. The man rings my doorbell and drops a heavy box on my porch. I waddle over to get it. We make eye contact as I struggle to lift the box inside. The guy quickly turns around back to his van.)

    Me: “Hi. Could—”

    (He’s back at the van at this point, looking very much like he’s trying to ignore me. Suddenly he heads back again.)

    Me: “Could you please hel—”

    (He thrusts the invoice at me, barely looking.)

    Delivery Guy: “I forgot; you need to sign this.”

    Me: “Okay, but could you help me carry—”

    (He grabbed the signed order and rushed off, leaving me to handle the package alone. The best part? A few days later, another package arrived. The woman who delivered it went out of her way to help me move the box inside to a convenient spot. Same company and everything!)

    Service Request Is Stalled

    | Redmond, WA, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Employees

    (I am the receptionist at a local office park. Today an employee came down with a very embarrassed grin on her face.)

    Employee: “Hello. Uh, could I please ask you to submit a service request?”

    Me: “Sure, what’s it concerning?”

    Employee: “Uh, could I write it down on a post-it note for you?”

    (I’m confused by this but oblige her. She manages to write down a few words

    before breaking down into hysterical laughter.)

    Me: “Ma’am, are you okay?”

    Employee: “Yes, fine! Just… Oh, you are not going to believe this.”

    (She starts writing again, and then breaks down in laughter again. Seeing my increasingly perplexed expression only makes her giggle harder as she finishes her note and hands it back to me.)

    Employee: “You can use my exact wording there if it’ll help. I need to go home and change clothes.”

    (She bolted out of the lobby, and on the way out I noticed several dark stains on her pants. I looked at the note which read, “1st floor ladies’ toilets. 3rd stall lock is broken and toilet overflowed. (I literally had to crawl through s*** to get out!) Miss [Coworker] can bear witness.” I later asked said coworker who told with much amusement how she indeed happened to be using the sink when the poor employee scrambled out from under the locked stall door Indiana Jones style, with a tide of dirty water chasing after her.)

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