• Very Genderal Humor
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  • October's Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

    Category: Employees

    A Sandwich Infraction

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    Me: “Oh, instead of halves, could you cut that sandwich into quarters, please?”

    Cashier: “Sure. Did you want three quarters, or four quarters?”

    Me: “…”

    Not Fired Yet

    | OH, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Employees

    (We’re starting to close, and we always start with the lower level first. I’m up at the front counter, in case people come in. Three coworkers are downstairs cleaning, while the manager is upstairs in the office, checking the drawers. I hear someone call up on the radio.)

    Coworker: “Hey, [Manager], do you want to double check the downstairs?”

    Manager: “Did you set anything on fire?”

    Coworker: “No…”

    Me: “Not yet.”

    (There’s a second of silence.)

    Manager: “[My Name], you’re not allowed closing anymore.”

    Receiving A Rum-Punch

    | Scotland, UK | At The Checkout, Employees, Food & Drink

    (I’m at the supermarket about three minutes from my flat, doing a weekly shop, and grab a bottle of rum for a party I’m going to that night.)

    Cashier: “ID, please?”

    (I go to get it out my wallet, but it’s not there. After a brief moment of panic, I remember I took it out earlier while applying for a new job, and I’d left it with some paperwork in my bag at home.)

    Me: “Crap, sorry, I left it in my bag—”

    Cashier: *interrupting* “Then I can’t sell this to you.”

    Me: “That’s all right. I’ll come back later.” *smiles*

    (She gives me a funny look and I finish up, pay, and go home. About 15 minutes, later my flat-mate and I stop in at the same shop to get booze on our way to our friends’ party. I grab a bottle of the same rum and we go up to the checkout, with the same cashier from earlier.)

    Cashier: “You were here earlier!”

    Me: “Aye—”

    Cashier: “Hope you’d get a different person on the til!?”

    Me: “What? I—”

    Cashier: “—and HE can’t buy it for you!” *gestures at my flat-mate, who’s looking quite amused*

    Me: “He doesn’t need to—”

    Cashier: “You can’t buy alcohol without an ID proving you’re over 18!”

    (I’m normally a very patient person, but she’s interrupted me so much at this point, I lose my patience.)

    Me: “Which is in my hand! I told you earlier I’d come back with my ID, which I have! As you can see I’m 21, so will you please just sell me my rum?!”

    (She looks at the ID I’d been trying to give her for the entire interaction.)

    Cashier: “Wait, you’re- you’re not under-aged! Most people who’ve ‘forgotten’ their ID are kids chancing it!”

    Me: “Some, yes; not all. Now can I please buy the rum?”

    (She finished the transaction looking a bit embarrassed, with my flat-mate giggling through his own purchase – ID and all.)

    Will Be Sent Home Phone

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’m at a small store buying a few things and as I’m walking to the register I notice the cashier has her phone out. I walk up and set my items on the counter waiting to be rung up.)

    Cashier: “Hi, hold on one secondddddd…” *continues to text on her phone while I stand there with my wallet in my hand staring at her*

    (After about 30 more seconds she sends her text message and finally sets her phone down.)

    Cashier: “Okay. Did you find everything okay?”

    Me: “Wait, did you just make me, a paying customer, wait while you finished texting?”

    Cashier: *blank stare* “Uh…”

    A Piercing Observation

    | Sweden | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I’m helping my friend pick out some new earrings and everything has been pretty normal up until this point.)

    Cashier: “Hey, do any of you want to pierce your nose?”

    Me: *laughing* “No, I don’t think my parents would like that.”

    Cashier: “But you’ve already got a few!”

    Me: “Huh? No…”

    Cashier: “You’ve got one right there!” *points at a fairly large mole on my upper lip*

    Me: “That’s a mole.”

    Cashier: “Oh, okay.” *goes back to tidying a case like nothing happened*

    (It’s kind of scary to think that a guy like him does piercings for a living.)

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