• An Understanding Disability - 839 votes
  • November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

    Category: Food & Drink

    Raft Beer

    | Charlotte, NC, USA | Employees, Food & Drink

    (Three friends and I are at an outdoor adventure park on vacation. The park features the largest man-made white-water rafting attraction in the country, so large that the national team uses it for training at some times during the year. While the park does serve alcohol, there is a strict policy not to over-serve, and there are signs all over the park saying that if it appears that you have consumed alcohol, you WILL NOT be able to white-water raft for the remainder of the day. Prior to each white-water rafting excursion, everyone must sit through a safety and procedures lecture, regardless if you have done so at any other point in the day.)

    Worker: “How many of you will be riding?”

    Me: “There are four of us”

    Worker: “Four? I only count two!”

    Me: “Our friends are coming as we speak. They are over in the concession area.”

    Worker: “Well, they are not here RIGHT NOW, so they are about to miss the lecture and cannot take this ride. They’ll have to wait for the next one.”

    Me: “No, please, they’re running over right now!”

    (At this point, I wave and frantically motion to my friends to run to where we are standing. They arrive, but my friend had literally just purchased a beer from the concession stand and was just beginning to drink it.)

    Me: “See? Here they are; can we proceed to the lecture now?”

    Worker: “Oh, no, no, no!” *motions at the beer* “You’ve been drinking! You cannot white-water raft today!”

    (My friend quickly chugs the beer in one swift, almost heroic motion and throws the cup into the wastebasket.)


    Addicted To Crack(ers)

    , | Chicago, IL, USA | Bad Behavior, Coworkers, Food & Drink

    (Our restaurant makes a snack for the bar that is similar to Cracker Jack. We tend to sneak tastes of it when it is being made. I had forgotten myself and was eating a giant handful of it when the chef who made it came around the corner and caught me.)

    Chef: “Hey, uh, what are you snacking on there?”

    Me: “Oh, I had some Cracker Jack in my pocket.”

    Chef: “Funny, it looks just like the bar snack I just made.”

    Me: “I know! That’s weird, right?”

    Can’t Daylight Save This Order

    | Storrs, CT, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Time

    (It is the night Daylight Savings time ends. Around 1:40 am, Daylight Time, I order some food for delivery and they tell me it will arrive in 30-45 minutes. An hour and a half later, it still hasn’t arrived so I call the restaurant to complain. Note that because of the clocks turning back at 2:00 am, it is now only 2:10 am.)

    Me: “Hello, I placed an order for delivery an hour and a half ago. You told me it would be here in 30-45 minutes and it’s still not here.”

    Employee: “I see here that you ordered at 1:40 am. It’s now 2:10 am. It’s only been half an hour. It should be there in about 15-20 minutes.”

    Me: “No, I ordered it 90 minutes ago, before the clocks were set back.”

    Employee: “So you’re telling me the timestamp our computer automatically prints out is wrong and you didn’t order at 1:40 am?”

    Me: “No, I did, and then 20 minutes later Daylight Savings Time ended and it went back to 1:00 am. It’s now 70 minutes after that.”

    Employee: *sarcastically* “Right…. So our employees time-traveled back an hour to avoid making your food?”

    Me: “Do you understand how Daylight Savings Time works?”

    Employee: “I really don’t care. You ordered half an hour ago. We’re very busy right now. Unless you’re going to stop lying, just wait for your food.” *hangs up*

    (The food finally arrived after another half hour, and was cold. How do people not know how Daylight Savings Time works?)

    Not Quite The Cream Of The Crop

    | Waterville, ME, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Food & Drink

    (My father and I go into a coffee shop to get some donuts and coffee.)

    Cashier: “Can I take your order?”

    Dad: “Yes, I’d like to order a medium coffee with sugar and cream, please.”

    (The cashier paused, looking incredibly confused.)

    Cashier: “I’m sorry, sir, we can’t do sugar and cream. We can do cream and sugar, though.”

    Dad: “…”

    (Without another word we left the building and went to a different shop. My father sputtered angrily the whole way home, while I laughed myself to tears.)

    The Danger Cal-Zone

    | NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Employees, Food & Drink

    (There’s a local pizza place we’ve been loyal to for several years now, due to both price and quality. However, they keep their ovens VERY hot, and many things end up quite dark or outright burnt. We always ask for ours to be light, but check to make sure anyway before going home.)

    Husband: “Oh, d*** it, they burned my calzone!”

    Me: “Crap. Want me to bring it back?”

    Husband: “Please, you keep a level head better than me.”

    (I come back inside and step to the counter.)

    Me: “Excuse me, I don’t mean to complain but the calzone was—”

    (The guy at the counter grabs a ten dollar bill from the register and slaps it down.)

    Worker: “Just take it and go.”

    Me: “I don’t want my money back; I just want food that isn’t burnt.”

    Worker: “You’re always in here doing this. I don’t have time. I’ve got other customers to take care of.”

    Me: *turning to look at the three people sitting down* “Well, I didn’t want to make a scene; you got loud first. And, I haven’t had to complain in three or four months. I love your food, just not when it’s charcoal on the bottom.”

    Worker: “Oh, quit exaggerating and get out of here.”

    Me: *smacks the calzone on the counter, sounding like a wood block* “Still think I’m exaggerating?”

    Worker: “Just go! Just go!”

    (I go out to the car, take a long breath, and explain to my husband.)

    Husband: “WOW I’m glad that wasn’t me!”

    Me: “I’M not! I almost had to murder someone with a calzone!”

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