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    Category: Food & Drink

    Not An Apples To Apples World Anymore

    | Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I’m buying some fruit, and I’ve brought my own re-usable cloth bags.)

    Cashier: *stares blankly into my bag, which contains Macintosh apples*

    Bagger: “What’s the matter?”

    Cashier: “I’ve never seen anything like this before.”

    Bagger: “The cloth bags? Yeah, they’re not that common.”

    Cashier: “No, man. These APPLES, man! What the heck are they? I’ve never seen apples like these in my life.”

    Bagger: “Uh, they’re Macintoshes. We sell a lot of those.”

    Cashier: *shaking his head* “There are so many different types of apples, man, and I can’t keep up.”

    Hobson’s Sandwiches

    | Cape Coral, FL, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I am a Canadian tourist on vacation.)

    Subshop Worker: “Hi, welcome to [Sandwich Shop]. What can I get you?”

    Me: “Hi, I’ll get a foot-long meatball sub.”

    Subshop Worker: “Sorry, we don’t have meatballs right now.”

    Me: “Umm… Okay, I’ll get a foot-long cold cut.”

    Subshop Worker: “What bread?”

    Me: “Italian herbs and cheese.”

    Subshop Worker: “We only have Italian right now.”

    Me: “Then Italian it is I guess.”

    Subshop Worker: “What cheese?”

    Me: *annoyed from my first two issues where he asked instead of informing me they were out* “Swiss.”

    Subshop Worker: “We only have provolone right now.”

    Me: “Do I really have a choice?!”

    (I finished my order with no more problems until a casual conversation started as to where I was from. He then had the nerve to insult the Canadian Health Care system!)

    Don’t Take Out Thanksgiving Without Getting Takeout

    | NJ, USA | Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink, Holidays, Overtime

    (I’m currently doing inventory at my second job and end up in an aisle where our sales manager and our general manager are chatting about Thanksgiving and what they’ll do with the free time since nobody comes in. This is only the second year that our store is open on Thanksgiving and we get maybe three customers in the store.)

    Me: “Oh, I’ll be working. Who is closing on Thanksgiving?”

    Sales Manager: “[General Manager] and [Other Sales Manager] is. [General Manager]‘s going to order you guys Chinese food.”

    General Manager: *rolling his eyes but grinning nonetheless* “We’re not ordering Chinese food.”

    (They go back to chatting about Thanksgiving, commenting how it sucks that we have to be open when nobody even comes into the store. I’ve been half paying attention and adding to the conversation when prompted as they know I also work in a grocery store.)

    Me: “Yeah, I’m working my other job, too. It’ll be nice to have some calm here after the chaos, at least. I’ve got bets on how many people are going to yell at us for running out of shallots again this year.”

    General Manager: *looking at me confused* “But… you said you could work on Thanksgiving.”

    Me: *blinking* “I can. I’m only at my other job 7 am until 3 pm. I’m scheduled here at 5:30 pm.”

    General Manager: “Oh, okay!” *looks confused again* “But… when are you getting to eat Thanksgiving dinner?”

    Me: “Um… I’m not.”

    Sales Manager: *turns and looks pointedly at General Manager* “Order Chinese food.”

    General Manager: *nods*

    Establishing A New Sub-Standard

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink

    (I’m having a conversation with my husband about his coworkers. There are two supervisors on the weekend. He is one, and the other is known for being petty and a tattle-tale. He’s working Saturday but not Sunday.)

    Husband: “I’ll bring the rest of these doughnuts into work for everyone today. I said I would bring doughnuts or bagels in one day.”

    Me: “All right. Oh, tell me what [Other Supervisor]‘s reaction is! If she’s a crazy person, she’ll think you’re trying to act like you’re her boss by providing her with food. Someone did that at my old job once as a thank-you for everyone helping her out. One of the supervisors got all mad that by the act of buying her food, she was saying she was above the supervisor or something.”

    Husband: “I wouldn’t put it past her.”

    (Later:)

    Husband: “You were right. She claimed she ate a big lunch and wouldn’t eat one.”

    (Monday:)

    Husband: “She bought subs and drinks for everyone when I was off yesterday!”

    Orange Is The New Black

    | ON, Canada | Coworkers, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (I have some coworkers that are unbelievably messy and dirty. They wear the same clothes day after day and never clean up their personal spaces. Everything is covered in crumbs, spills, junk, and the worst part, FOOD. They just leave food sitting around for weeks, and we’re not talking hard candy here, either. It has been complained about to managers but nothing changes. One day I can’t take it any more and confront one of them about it.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker], how long has that orange been sitting around?”

    Coworker: “I don’t know. It’s still good, though.”

    Me: “It looks a little soft.”

    Coworker: *picking it up and squishing it* “It’s still good.”

    Me: “I don’t think fruit is supposed to squish like that.”

    Coworker: “It’s fine.”

    Me: “The skin has black marks all over it and it’s no longer orange.”

    Coworker: “No, it’s still good. I’ll eat it.”

    Me: *giving up* “Okay, then.”

    (Several days later…)

    Coworker: “I threw out that orange today, just for you, so you’d feel better. It was still good though!”

    Me: *facepalm*


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