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    Category: Food & Drink

    Affogato Be Kidding

    | England, UK | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I go to the bar to order food, and find that the thing I was going to get has just sold out.)

    Bar Staff: “Can I get you a drink while you decide what else you want?”

    Me: “Could I get an ice water, please?”

    Bar Staff: “One affogato. Sure.”

    Me: “Uh, no. An ice water, please.”

    Bar Staff: “One affogato coming up.”

    Me: “I said ICE. WATER. Please.”

    Bar Staff: “Oh! Oh, right. Yeah. Sure, okay.”

    (I’m handed a glass of water.)

    Me: “Could I have the mozzarella and basil panini, but without tomatoes please? I can’t eat tomatoes.”

    Bar Staff: “Mozzarella panini, sure. You want chips with that?”

    Me: “Okay. Yes, please. But no tomatoes. I’m allergic.”

    (I return to my table with everybody else. After a while, everybody’s food comes out.)

    Friend: “Wow, that is a lot of tomatoes you’re having.”

    (There were tomatoes in the panini, tomatoes on the chips, and a side of tomato-based salad I didn’t order or pay for. I suppose if they misheard ‘ice water’ as ‘affogato,’ mishearing “I’m allergic” as “I’d like extra” isn’t too far of a stretch, but still…)

    Putting A Finger On The Problem

    | Ireland | Bad Behavior, Employees, Food & Drink

    Me: *flagging down a waitress* “Excuse me, but this lasagna is frozen in the centre.”

    Waitress: *sticking her finger into my food* “It feels fine to me!”

    In A Pickle Over Freshness

    | Sauerland, Germany | Employees, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (My wife and I are at a restaurant. My wife has ordered a dish that comes with a salad.)

    Wife: “Excuse me, this salad isn’t fresh anymore!”

    Waitress: “Can’t be. Our salad is always fresh.”

    Wife: “Just look at these cucumber slices. They’re all baggy and limp!”

    Waitress: “The cucumber?! But we pickle them to keep them fresh! They’re

    definitely fresh! Under no circumstances older than three days!”

    Might As Well Just Be Giving Them A Raspberry

    | WI, USA | At The Checkout, Bosses & Owners, Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I am extremely sensitive to pesticides, and as a result, I always buy my berries organic. The store has a huge sale on non-organic raspberries which completely sell out. Since organic raspberries are $1.50 more, there still are plenty.)

    Cashier: “How did you find these? I was told we are all sold out!”

    Me: “Well, your regular ones are sold out, but these ones are organic, so—”

    Cashier: “Hold on, these aren’t ringing up on sale.”

    Me: “Yes, that’s fine. They’re organic, so they cost more.”

    Cashier: “But raspberries are supposed to be on sale. Let me see if I can get a manager for you.”

    Me: “The REGULAR raspberries are on sale; the organic are regular priced. It’s fine, really.”

    Cashier: “No! Raspberries are on sale!” *begins paging the manager*

    Me: “No, really it’s fine. I’ll just pay this price. I need to get home.”

    Manager: “What’s the problem?”

    Cashier: “This woman is trying to buy these raspberries, but they’re not ringing up on sale.”

    Manager: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, the sale only extends to non-organic raspberries.”

    Me: “I KNOW. I’ve been trying to explain this to the cashier here, and I’m okay with paying more, but she’s not hearing me.”

    Manager: “It’s just that organic berries cost more to maintain, and—”

    Me: “I KNOW! Look! I. WILL. PAY. THIS. PRICE. I’m not looking for a discount, I just wanted organic raspberries!”

    Manager: *looking confused* “But… they’re organic. We can’t give you the sale price.”

    Me: “I know, and I already said REPEATEDLY that it’s fine.”

    Manager: “You know what? I’ll make an exception for you this time. But next time, we’re not giving you a discount for buying an organic product!”

    (He then gave me the discount for the regular raspberries. I’m not entirely certain it was worth the headache.)

    Should Have Been Left To Stew In Your Own Juice

    | Devon, England, UK | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’m in the supermarket looking for tomato juice but they have run out of long-life cartons and I don’t know where the fresh juice is kept, so I find an employee.)

    Me: “Where is your fresh tomato juice, please?”

    Employee: “Uh, I have no idea.”

    Me: “…”

    Employee: *seeing this is not making me go away* “Uh… it might be with the bottled soy sauce and stuff?”

    Me: “No,it’ll be refrigerated. FRESH tomato juice?”

    (The employee then wanders over to a nearby chilled cabinet, looks around for a bit and then triumphantly holds up a tub of tomato and basil spaghetti sauce.)

    Employee: “Here you go!”

    Me: “Umm… no…”

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