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  • June's Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

    Category: Food & Drink

    Giving Great Import To The Price

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Liars/Scammers

    (The menu on the wall lists two prices for beer: domestic and imported. It doesn’t list the brands, but I see through the glass door of the cooler that they have Anchor Steam beer, from San Francisco, so I order that. When the clerk rings up the sale, I notice he has charged me the ‘imported’ price.)

    Me: “Hey, that’s a domestic beer!”

    Clerk: “Yeah, I know, but we call it imported because it’s expensive.”

    The Sauce Of Your Discontent

    | MI, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Employees, Food & Drink

    (I am easily nauseated by certain sauces, but I like to have sauce when I can. Note that I can be real sarcastic at times.)

    Me: “What kind of sauce is on this chicken wrap?”

    Employee: “Any sauce, ma’am.”

    Me: “What kind of sauces do you have?”

    Employee: “We have all the sauces.”

    Me: “What kind of sauces are those?”

    Employee: “We have all the sauces, ma’am.”

    Me: “But what kind of sauces is all the sauces?”

    Employee: “We have every sauce.”

    Me: “Do you have gravy, then?”

    Employee: “We have all the sauces.”

    Me: “Even gravy? Even salsa? Even strawberry and rhubarb sauce?”

    Employee: “…”

    Me: “Do you have that one sauce, ya know? The one made from the souls of little children?”

    Employee: “…We have all the sauces, ma’am.”

    Me: “Do you have barbecue sauce?”

    Employee: “Yes.”

    Me: “I’ll have the chicken wrap with barbecue sauce, please.”

    Not A Happy Beer-Camper

    | Westchester, NY, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (A special, one-time-only 12-pack has been released by Sierra Nevada. It contains brewing collaborations with 12 different brewers across the country, and is aptly named “Beer Camp Across America”)

    Me: “Hi, I was wondering if you had a specialty item in stock. It’s a new 12-pack called ‘Beer Camp’.”

    Employee: “You said it’s called ‘Beer Camp’?”

    Me: “Yes, that’s right. By Sierra Nevada.”

    Employee: “Do you know what section that would be in?”

    Me: “…Beer?”

    Find Anything To Wine About

    | Nottingham, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink

    (I work in a call centre that sets up appointments and work schedules for IT engineers. My supervisor is horrible and always tries to big herself up to the manager by getting the staff in trouble. She hates me in particular as I’m a pretty cheery person and get on well with the engineers and management. In addition to this I have always bought the nicest food I can afford and frequent some of the more expensive delis in town where I sometimes get treats for the office that are a bit posh, and she gets quite jealous.)

    Manager: *sternly* “Can I speak to you in my office, please?”

    Me: *confused* “Okay.”

    Manager: “I think you know why I have brought you in here today.”

    Me: “…No?”

    Manager: “[Supervisor] has advised me on many occasions she has seen you drinking wine at your desk. We take these matters very seriously and I’ve come to advise you of our intent to discipline you for gross misconduct which, if found to be true, could lead to you instant dismissal. Do you understand and have anything to say at this point?”

    (At this point I am understandably upset as I have never touched alcohol while working.)

    Me: “I don’t understand. I haven’t ever brought wine to work let alone drunk it at my desk in full view of the office. When did [Supervisor] say I did this?”

    Manager: “She observed you many times this week openly pouring wine from a bottle of wine into a glass on your desk and drinking it. Are you saying you deny this despite [Supervisor] saying she has multiple witnesses?”

    Me: *brain engaging* “Wait? Did you say a bottle at my desk… It’s not wine! It’s on my desk now if you want to go and see.”

    (My manager follows me to my desk – sitting in plain sight us a glass bottle of raspberry and vanilla cordial I bought from the posh deli. Note at this point we are now yards away from my Supervisor’s desk.)

    Me: “As you or anyone else can clearly see this is fruit juice, not wine. I’ve been adding it to water for the last week. If anyone had actually bothered to look rather than drag me into an office or accuse me of something so serious we wouldn’t be in this position!”

    Manager: “[Supervisor], a word in my office…”

    Spill Your Heart Out

    | Cape Town, South Africa | Awesome Workers, Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink

    (I run a small IT company from home and hand-deliver small orders such as hard drives and software on Fridays. On this particular Friday I am not all there as the day before I had to have one of my cats put down due to severe kidney problems. I make my first stop at a client’s house to deliver a parcel and decide to stop at a cafe and get some coffee afterwards. I head back to my car and put my coffee in the cup holder and drive to the next address. Unfortunately as I arrive I realize I’d given the previous client the wrong parcel and have to drive back to make the exchange. In order to do this I have to make a U-turn. Due to the fact that it is extremely busy on the roads and me not wanting to cause inconvenience. I turn quite quickly which in turn leads to my coffee being spilled all over my lap. After swapping the parcels I go to get a new coffee when the following occurs.)

    Me: “Good morning, again. Could I please have a large coffee with two sugars and one cream, please?”


    Cashier: “Of course. Is there anything else you’d like?”

    Me: “No, that’s all.”

    (The cashier starts making my drink, then stops and looks at me confused.)

    Cashier: “Wait a minute, weren’t you in here a few minutes ago ordering the exact same thing?”

    Me: “Yes, I was. I unfortunately spilt my previous coffee all over my car by accident.”

    Cashier: “I see.”

    (At this point the cashier has finished making my drink and hands it to me. I hold out the money when he suddenly calls over the manager and says something to him then turns to me.)

    Cashier: *to me* “Please tell him what happened.”

    (Confused, I tell the manager what happened and step back so he can see the wet stains on my pants from where the coffee landed.)

    Manager: *to me* “Ma’am, I can’t charge you for this. You’re the fifth person today to come back after spilling coffee on themselves but the first to not shout at my cashier, screaming that it was his fault it happened and that we owe you free stuff . You accepted your mistake and came back to buy a new one. You come in here every Friday and are by far the kindest person we serve.”

    (At this point tears are rolling down my cheeks as I try to keep it together.)

    Manager: “I noticed today you were a bit different as you’re usually all smiles. I’ve decided to let you have your coffee free of charge and if you’d like you can have a pastry with it.”

    (I wipe away tears and politely decline the pastry and take my coffee.)

    Me: “Thank you so much. You’re right, I usually am all smiles but unfortunately yesterday I had to put down one of my cats as he was quite sick and old.”

    Manager: “I’m sorry to hear that, ma’am. I hope your days get better.”

    Me: “Thank you. Goodbye. I hope you all have a lovely weekend.”

    (To that cashier and manager, I know it seems silly but your small act of kindness made getting through the day easier.)

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