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    Category: Food & Drink

    Not Quite Nuts About Your Allergies

    | Dubai, UAE | Employees, Food & Drink, Health & Body, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I am 14, and my family and I go out for dinner.)

    Waiter: “Here is your food: two 1/2 pound burgers with chips, one serving of sticky pork belly with salad, and one seafood curry.”

    Dad: “The buns on the burgers have sesame seeds.”

    Waiter: “So?”

    Dad: “We said that my son here is allergic to sesame seeds.”

    Waiter: “No, you didn’t.”

    Dad: “Yes, we did. I can assure you of that.”

    Mum: “He did; trust me.”

    Waiter: *sarcastically* “Oh, okay, I’m very sorry. I’ll have his food re-made.”

    (He gives my dad an annoyed look as he walks off. We wait another 20 minutes, at which point my brother’s food arrives again, this time without a sesame seed bun.)

    Waiter: “Terribly sorry, sir. Won’t happen again.”

    (We enjoy our drinks and meals while listening to the music in the background. A little later on we order desserts, and my brother orders a sorbet with a strawberry liquorice strip. At this point we also say that he’s allergic to nuts and eggs as a reminder. Dessert arrives, and there are little beige pieces all around the sorbet, much to my worry.)

    Dad: “Are these nuts?”

    Me: “I don’t know. Let me try one.” *I can’t tell; it’s tasteless*

    Mum: “Maybe you should check with the waiter?”

    Dad: *sigh* “All right.”

    (We call him over and ask him to check. My brother has already eaten a few of the pieces. Waiter comes back.)

    Waiter: “The sorbet does not have egg, but, um… those little pieces are nuts.”

    Dad: “Wait… What did you say?”

    Mum: “What?”

    Waiter: “I said those pieces are nuts.”


    Mum: “Did you eat any of those pieces?”

    Brother: *crying* “Yes!”

    Dad: “Get a doctor or something! Get his epipen too! This is outrageous!”

    Waiter: “Sir, I’m sorry…”

    Dad: “I don’t want to hear it. You should have listened to us!”

    (My brother doesn’t have an allergic reaction, and the restaurant manager and doctor are called in. Thankfully they weren’t nuts, but actually little biscuit pieces, to which we were all relieved.)

    Manager: “I’m really sorry about all this.”

    Dad: “It’s all right now, but he hasn’t paid attention to how my son here has allergies!”

    Manager: “Seriously? We take that very seriously here. I shall speak with him.”

    Me: “Thank you very much.”

    Mum: “Yes, thank you.”

    Manager: “It’s all good now. How about I give you all free drinks to say sorry? On the house!”

    Brother: *sniffling* “I’d like that. Yes, please…”

    (So, we got free drinks and had half the price of our meal slashed off. Meanwhile, we have no idea what happened to the waiter. Maybe he got fired.)

    How To Cheese Off The Cashier

    , | Los Angeles, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Food & Drink

    (The restaurant normally sells hamburgers for $.89, but they are having a special where two cheeseburgers for $1.00. I don’t eat cheese.)

    Me: “I’d like two cheeseburgers, no cheese, please.”

    Employee: “So, two hamburgers?”

    Me: “Yes, but since cheeseburgers are cheaper now, I want the cheeseburger special. So, cheeseburgers, but no cheese.”

    Employee: “We can’t do that.”

    Me: “Why not?”

    Employee: “It’s not a cheeseburger.”

    Me: “Can I get it without pickle?”

    Employee: “Sure, how ever you want it.”

    Me: “Without ketchup?”

    Employee: “Yes.”

    Me: “No mustard?”

    Employee: “Yes.”

    Me: “But not without cheese?”

    Employee: “No, then it’s not a cheeseburger.”

    Me: “But you realize, you have to pay for cheese, so you make more money this way.”

    Employee: “But we can’t do that.”

    Me: “Can I get the cheese on the side?”

    Employee: “Sure.”

    (The employee then took my order, and gave me two hamburgers with a French fry package with two slices of cheese in it. I took the cheese and tossed it in the trash can and walked out.)

    Failing To Reach New Levels Of Intoxication

    | TX, USA | Employees, Food & Drink

    (Our small town is located in a “Dry County” which means any business in the county cannot have alcohol for sale. The locals know this but people from out of town and tourists don’t. As such, we get several people (usually already inebriated) asking us where our beer section is. Tired of trying to argue with drunk people that we don’t have one, I made up this excuse.)

    Customer: “Where’s your beer section?”

    Me: “Oh, it’s up on the second floor.” *our store is only one floor*

    Customer: “Okay!”

    (This works about 90% of the time and the customer will spend up until 30 minutes trying to find the stairs to the second floor before finally becoming sober enough to realize I tricked them.)

    It’s Toughy To Work Out The Taffy

    | MN, USA | Awesome Workers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (My three-year-old daughter wants candy while out shopping, so I give her a dollar and tell her to pick out just one. She takes one piece of taffy to the counter to ask how much it is.)

    Daughter: “How much is just one candy, please?”

    Busy Cashier: *thinks a moment* “You know what, if you can wait until you get back out in the hallway, you can have it for free. As a present.”

    Daughter: “Wow! Thank you!”

    (We leave and continue shopping elsewhere, and it’s not till later I realize it was probably easier for the busy cashier to write one taffy off as shrinkage rather than work it out by pound!)

    This Coffee Is Flat-line

    | Inland Empire, CA, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Food & Drink

    (I am at a well-known coffee chain getting my personal tumbler filled with my favorite new summer drink.)

    Me: “I’ll have a Cold Brew.”

    Cashier: *to barista making drinks* “She wants a Code Blue!… Wait, did I just say that?”


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