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    Category: Food & Drink

    Sending Her Anxiety The Way Of The Dinosaurs

    | England, UK | Awesome Workers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (I’m a young adult with severe anxiety issues, so I always get a bit nervous going out in public. Once a week I meet my sister at a local cafe, but because I have to wait for her to arrive I’m always worried I’ll get called out for not having ordered anything when I sit down. I also always carry a stuffed toy dinosaur with me for comfort. When a server comes over to me, I think I’m about to be kicked out, so I probably look terrified.)

    Server: *speaking gently* “You know, I see you come in here a lot, and I just wanted to say I love your dinosaur! Seeing him always makes me want to work extra hard. He makes me so happy.”

    Me: “Well… he is a carnivore, so… if you slack off he’ll probably eat you.”

    Server: “Oh, consider myself warned! And I just wanted you to know you don’t have to be nervous, dear. We know your friend is coming. Is she buying you cake today?”

    Me: *nods*

    Server: “Good for you. I’d better get back to work before I get eaten!”

    (She smiles at me every time I come in now, and I’m no longer nervous about sitting and waiting for my sister!)

    Totally Out Of Order

    , | Toronto, ON, Canada | Bizarre/Silly, Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive

    Me: “Hi, could I please have a [breakfast sandwich] on a sesame seed bagel, with a cinnamon roll and a [Cola], please?”

    Cashier: *rings everything in properly* “That will be [total], please.”

    (I pay, and she starts getting my order ready. She comes back after a moment.)

    Cashier: “Sorry, we’re all out of [donut I didn’t order]. Would you like something else instead?”

    Me: *slightly confused* “Um… no problem. Can I have a cinnamon bun?”

    (She gets the cinnamon bun for me and goes to get my drink. Again, she comes back empty handed.)

    Cashier: “I’m so sorry to do this again, but we’re out of [drink I didn’t order] as well.”

    Me: “Can I get a [Cola], please?”

    (She brings my drink back, just as the person making my sandwich steps up.)

    Sandwich Person: “Sorry, but we’re out of [bagel I didn’t order]…”

    The Sweet Taste Of Death

    | SC, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Health & Body, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (My friend and I decide to stop at a popular local coffee shop known for their smoothies. My friend is waiting outside with our dogs.)

    Me: “I’d like a large mango smoothie and a medium banana smoothie. Could you also please make sure the banana doesn’t touch any peanut products? My friend is allergic.”

    Barista #1: “Certainly. It will be ready shortly.”

    (Evidently the entire neighborhood had the same idea we did, so there’s a small wait for frozen drinks. While the baristas are busy making and taking orders, I quick pop outside to ask my friend something and check on my dog. By the time I come back in, our drinks are already made, but I notice something off about the color of my friend’s smoothie and decide to taste it before I bring it to him.)

    Me: “Um, ma’am, this is a peanut butter banana smoothie. I asked for just banana because my friend is allergic. If he drank this, it would kill him.”

    (The barista immediately goes pale and some of the chatter in the shop dies down. She immediately turns to one of her two coworkers, who evidently was the one who made the smoothies.)

    Barista #1: “Did you put peanut butter in the banana smoothie?!”

    Barista #2: “Yeah. They taste better that way. The regular banana ones are kind of bland.”

    Barista #3: “You don’t do something like that! He’s allergic! He could have died!”

    Barista #2: “Oh. Well, how was I supposed to know that?”

    Barista #1: “She told us! I wrote it down on the slip so you knew! Didn’t you bother reading it before you made the drinks?!”

    Barista #2: “How do you know she isn’t lying, though?”

    Me: “Do you really want to chance that I might be lying about my friend having a life-threatening peanut allergy by giving him peanut butter because you think it tastes better?”

    (The woman who took my order apologizes and remakes the smoothie personally, this time being careful to avoid any cross-contamination, and not only refunds the cost of it but also gives us a voucher for a free drink and cookie, and some water for our dogs. I explain to my friend what happened while we’re walking home.)

    Friend: “Huh…she’s right though. It does taste a little bland. Maybe I should have taken the one with death in it instead.”

    A Problem With The Order Before It’s Ordered

    | Tulsa, OK, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Employees, Food & Drink

    (I have just moved into a small apartment that used to be maid`s quarters in a posh part of town. I call the nearest pizza joint and ask if they deliver to my address. When the worker hears my address, he immediately gives the phone to the manager.)

    Manager: *sarcastic* “So you want a pizza for delivery?”

    Me: *confused at the sarcasm* “Yes…”

    Manager: “You’re not going to give us any problems?”

    Me: “No? Look, if I’m outside of your delivery area…”

    Manager: “No, no, we will deliver it. I just don’t want any problems.”

    (I hung up, still quite confused. It was only my second or third day in town. Finally there was a knock at the door. When I opened it, you could have knocked the delivery boy over with a feather, he looked so stunned. I paid and tipped him, and he left, still flustered. A while later, the manager called to apologize profusely.  It turned out my new address was flagged in the system because the previous tenant would order pizza then send them back or refuse to pay for them! The delivery boy had expected her to open the door and was flummoxed to see me instead!)

    Not Getting To The Meat Of The Problem, Part 5

    , | ON, Canada | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (My friend and I are babysitting our friend’s five-year-old son so that she can attend a Christmas party for her work. We decide, since he is behaving well, to order pizza for dinner while we watch his ‘Thomas the Tank Engine’ movies. I call and am placing the order:)

    Friend’s Son: “Can I tell the lady what I would like on my pizza?”

    Me: “Sure. Speak clearly and use your manners.”

    Friend’s Son: “Okay!” *into the phone* “Pepperoni on my pizza, please!”

    (I take the phone back and he runs to play with his trains.)

    Me: “Okay, on the second pizza I would like…” *I prattle off a list of vegetables, as I am a vegetarian and my friend loves veggie pizza anyway*

    Worker: “Anything else?”

    Me: “Yeah, are there any veggies I forgot?”

    Worker: *silent for almost a minute* “Umm… ham? I don’t know my vegetables.”

    Me: *speechless*

    Worker: “So, ham?”

    Me: “No, thanks. Uh, that’s all.”

    (I hang up the phone and tell my friend what happened, to which he laughs and is simultaneously shocked and amused.)

    Me: “Let me test something.” *calls five-year-old over* “Honey, is ham a meat or a vegetable?”

    Friend’s Son: *confused* “It is a meat! Why?”

    Me: “The pizza lady thought it was a vegetable.”

    Friend’s Son: *digging in his toy drawer for more train tracks* “Maybe she should go back to kindergarten.”

    Related:
    Not Getting To The Meat Of The Problem, Part 4
    Not Getting To The Meat Of The Problem, Part 3
    Not Getting To The Meat Of The Problem, Part 2


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