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  • For A Few Dollars More
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  • Category: Geography

    Call Fahrenheit 911

    | FL, USA | Coworkers, Geography, Health & Body

    (I’m posting up the weather forecast on the communication board for my delivery drivers. An employee sees this and comes over.)

    Employee: “What is this paper for?”

    Me: “We have a cold front coming through so I want to make sure you guys are ready.”

    Employee: “How cold?”

    Me: “About 30 degrees.”

    Employee: *with little concern* “Okay.”

    Me: “Seriously, it will fall below freezing and you are closing that night. Make sure you wear layers.”

    (He gives me blank look until I remember he had moved from Cuba about eight months previous.)

    Me: “About -1 degree Celsius.”

    Employee: *with a panicked look* “That is way too cold! I cannot work! I will die!”

    Best Customer, No Question

    | MA, USA | Awesome Workers, Employees, Geography

    Associate: “Hi, any questions?”

    Me: “No, just browsing.”

    Associate: “Really? No questions? What’s my favorite color? What’s the capital of Iceland?”

    Me: “Reykjavik.”

    Associate: *high-fives me* “You are the first person to get that! You’re my favorite customer!”

    (Gotta say, I left the store feeling pretty good after that.)

    Flights Of Fancy

    | South Africa | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Geography, Tourists & Travel, Transportation

    (I am a pilot. On this particular overseas flight, a very common route, about 90% of the flight is over the ocean. An air hostess comes in with my breakfast.)

    Hostess: “Good morning. Ooh, it’s quite bright in here, isn’t it?”

    Me: “Yeah. Good weather today.”

    Hostess: *leaning over to look out of the cockpit window* “Oh, wow, we’re over the ocean!”

    (She puts down my breakfast and leaves the cockpit. My co-pilot and I look at each other.)

    Co-Pilot: “Did she just say what I think she said?”

    Me: “Yeah. For a moment I wasn’t sure I heard that right, either. If we weren’t over the ocean, I would be seriously concerned about where we were going to end up!”

    Incontinent Telephone Service

    | USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Geography, Technology, Tourists & Travel

    (I am planning a trip to France. I call my cellular provider to find out what I need to do to make calls while I’m there.)

    Me: “I’m planning a trip to Europe, and I need to know what I need to do to make calls while I’m there.”

    Rep: “I’ve looked over the list of countries where you can make calls, and Europe isn’t on the list.”

    Me: “I’m going to France.”

    Rep: “Yes, that’s on the list.”

    Hasn’t Cracked His Da Vinci Code

    | Howell, NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Geography, History, Theme Of The Month

    (I am in line with my dad as the cashier is ringing up our items.)

    Cashier: *to my dad* “You look foreign. Are you from here?”

    Dad: “Nope, I came here from Italy in the ‘60s.”

    Cashier: “Oh, wow, that’s amazing. Did they even have planes then?”

    Dad: “Well, I came here on a boat named ‘Leonardo da Vinci.’”

    Cashier: “WOW, you knew Leonardo da Vinci?!”

    Dad: “Yeah, he was a great guy!”


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