• An Understanding Disability - 817 votes
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    Category: Language & Words

    Just A Little Nibble Towards Racism

    | Williamsburg, VA, USA | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

    (I am working in a haunted house at a popular amusement park. The room I work has two wooden walls with bars. The people working the room run out from the shadows, striking the walls and screaming. We are supposed to be vampires, and are allowed to say anything with a few exceptions. For example, the only people allowed to make any references to eating the guests are the people in the kitchen area. Tonight I am working with a new girl who does not know that.)


    Guest #1: “DA F**** SHE JUST SAY?”


    (The two girls continue on ranting about the racist vampire, my coworker standing with a shocked expression.)

    Me: “And now you understand why [Stage Manager] said phrases like that are only allowed in the kitchen.”

    New Girl: “Yeah… not saying THAT again.”

    That’s Some Real Broken Spanish

    | Washington, DC, USA | Employees, Language & Words, Rude & Risque, Technology

    (This area has a big Hispanic population. I speak a tiny bit of Spanish but I’m terrible at it and forget words all the time. The following takes place in Spanish.)

    Customer: *in Spanish* “Are you showing ‘Planet of the Apes’ at 1:30 pm? It said it was, online.”

    Me: *crappy Spanish* “Yes, we have that movie. It is first movie at 1:30 pm and second movie at 3:30 pm.”

    Customer: “Oh! Okay. It isn’t on your sign.”

    Me: “I am sorry. It is a problem this week. The computers are… are…” *realizing I can’t remember the word for ‘broken’ in Spanish* “…s***. The computers are s***.”

    Customer: “S***?”

    Me: “…Yes.”


    Me: “I do not remember the Spanish word for…” *in English* “Broken.”

    Customer: “It’s ‘roto’, but ‘s***’ is a good word, too.”

    A Well-Choreographed Kitchen

    | AB, Canada | Employees, Language & Words

    (I work in a restaurant doing food preparation. Our stations are situated behind the line where food is actually cooked, but there is a window in the partition that is open so we can communicate with each other. Note that I am fairly new and haven’t yet grasped all the kitchen terminology.)

    Cook #1: “Can I get pans team to line?”

    Me: *to another coworker* “Did he just say ‘dance team to line’?”

    (Everyone in earshot erupts with laughter. The cooks from the pans team come up behind us, shuffling on their feet to get by.)

    Cook #2: “Hey, we’re dancin’, aren’t we?”

    Won’t Be Carded For Lying

    | Asheville, NC, USA | Coworkers, Language & Words

    (I am not a fan of a coworker getting ready to move away. She has been utterly useless, confrontational, frequently hungover, and sometimes still drunk during her time at the restaurant and I make it no secret I dislike her.  Another coworker is passing around one of those ‘everybody says good luck’ cards to sign for her)

    Coworker With The Card: “Hey, did you want to sign [Useless Coworker]’s card?”

    Me: *looks at card, at the coworker, then out to the coworker about to move, and back again* “I prefer not to lie to people.” *walks away*

    This Way Leads To Trouble

    | MA, USA | Coworkers, Language & Words

    Coworker: “Excuse me; I need to go do the mail.”

    Me: *doesn’t move*

    Coworker: “GTFOMA.”

    Me: “Get…The…F***…Out…of…My…A**?”

    Coworker: “Yes! Wait – No! Get out of my way, not my a**! GTFOMW!”

    Me: “What was I doing in your a**?”

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