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    Category: Lazy/Unhelpful

    Undeliverable Management

    | NC, USA | Bosses & Owners, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’m working at a security firm and we hold our annual security symposium for the professionals in the security arena. Several hundred guests gather there ranging from law enforcement, consultants, and vendors. While printing out labels and cross-referencing our database, I’m noticing that our worthless office manager has not been updating the addresses as part of her job. Customers inform us of their new address and I don’t know if she is just throwing them away or what, but it’s clear she is not updating the information. We are sending out about 500 invitations and I’m noticing about 60% of the addresses are wrong.)

    Me: “Hey, [Office Manager], where is the database kept for the symposium attendees?”

    Office Manager: “Why?”

    Me: “Well, I’ve been looking up the contacts while creating the labels and I’m noticing some very old data. The contact and/or addresses are not current.

    Office Manager: “Now is NOT the time to be updating the database.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, what?”

    Office Manager: “Now is NOT the time to be updating the database. We got 500 of these invites to get in the mail ASAP.”

    Me: “Maybe I’m not speaking clearly. I’m noticing most of these addresses are not correct. For example [Contact] died, like, two years ago, and the address of his company moved several months ago.”

    Office Manager: *blank stare*

    Me: “I’ll speak slower. These addresses, roughly 60% of them are wrong. So we are mailing out invites to people who are dead, not at the address, or do not exist anymore. We KNOW the addresses are wrong, and the mailman is only going to return all of this mail to us as undeliverable. So, if we KNOW the addresses are incorrect, and we have the correct information, then now is the PERFECT time to be updating the address. So can you tell me where the database is so I can update the info so people will actually get the invites?”

    Office Manager: “No.”

    Me: “Okay, so you want me to send out roughly 500 invites, knowing full well roughly 60% of them are the wrong contact information and will surely get returned to us?”

    Office Manager: *annoyed* “Yes, we have a lot of these to send out and NOW is NOT the time to be updating information. We’ve got to get these out now!”

    (I stare in disbelief, and then return to my office. I print off the mostly incorrect labels and give them to her. The entire office pitches in and stuffs the envelopes and I drop all 500 of them in the mail. About two weeks go by and, to no one’s surprise except hers, well over 250 letters are given back to us with “UNDELIVERABLE: Return to sender.” She looks completely shocked and heartbroken that all her work was for naught. The CEO, who personally created the symposium which has been HUGELY popular over the years, especially after 9/11, is embarrassed and cannot figure out why hardly any folks attended this year.)

    Me: *to Office Manager* “Do you think we should upda— You know what? Never mind.”

    Has No Website Foresight

    | FL, USA | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful, Technology

    (I am looking for a particular gift for my nephew, and when I Google it on my phone, I’m happy to see it on the website of a department store only a few miles from my house – and the website says my local store has it in stock! I drive to the store and, at the customer-service counter, show my phone to the clerk and ask her where I can find it.)

    Clerk: “We don’t have those.”

    Me: “Are you sure?”

    Clerk: *condescending tone* “Yes. Have you tried looking on our website? On the Internet?”

    (She handed me back my phone, which was still displaying the item. On their website. On the Internet. I found the item in their little toy section. They had four. I resisted the urge to take it back and wave it under her nose.)

    It’s A Slippery Oily Slope

    | WA, USA | Coworkers, Food & Drink, Health & Body, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’m an events specialist, and for this demo I have to go the back area of the deli in a very busy store I don’t usually work in. I notice both how oily the area smells and how quickly the employees forget I’m there and overhear the following:)

    Employee #1: “So, about the oil in this fryer – how often should we filter it?”

    Employee #2: “Oh, I guess we’re supposed to do it every night, but I just use the basket to kind of it stir it so it doesn’t look too bad. Manager makes us do too many things to worry about it. I maybe do it, like, once a week.”

    Employee #1: “Does that work?”

    Employee #2: “Yeah, the oil’s so hot it should kill anything bad.”

    The Battery Isn’t The Only Thing Dying

    | Malaysia | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful, Technology

    (The battery in my phone has been draining rather quickly, and I suspect the battery needs to be changed. As my phone uses an internal battery, I cannot simply go out and get a new one; rather, I have to send it to a service centre and allow them to open up the phone. There is only one service centre which supposedly provides this service, and the location is very inconvenient for me. Therefore, I call up their centre to ask for certain details before having to make the long trip there.)

    Me: “Hi, I am calling to ask if your centre is able to change the battery for my [Phone model]?”

    Receptionist: “What is your service number?”

    Me: “Huh?”

    Receptionist: “Service number. What is your number?”

    Me: “I don’t have a number; I am calling to inquire about your service.”

    Receptionist: “Oh, what do you want?”

    Me: “Do you provide service for changing the battery of [Phone model]?”

    Receptionist: “Go out and buy one.”

    Me: “I can’t. It’s an internal battery. That’s why I’m calling.”

    Receptionist: “Send your phone in. We don’t know what’s your problem.”

    Me: “I’m trying to tell you. I just want to change my battery.”

    Receptionist: “No. You have to send it in. We don’t know what’s your problem.”

    Me: “Look. There is no problem. I just want to know if you provide the service. If you don’t, then I will be making a wasted trip there. And I might be without a phone for a few days so I need to prepare a backup.”

    Receptionist: “Then I cannot help you.”

    Me: “You can’t even give me a quotation for the services you provide?”

    Receptionist: “No, because we don’t know what’s the problem.”

    Me: *speaking slowly and clearly in my last attempt to make her understand* “Okay, the problem is the battery. I need to change it. So, how much would that be?”

    Receptionist: “We need to check your phone first. No quotations. Send your phone in.”

    Needs To Get A Stronger Backbone

    | Pasadena, MD, USA | Coworkers, Health & Body, Lazy/Unhelpful, Liars/Scammers

    (I work at a car parts store. One of my coworkers is not that bright, but also very lazy. He tries to get out of work whenever he can.)

    Coworker: “Aw, man, my back is killing me. Can I go home early?”

    Me: “No, you went home early yesterday.”

    Coworker: “But my back is killing me today and it just gets worse.”

    Me: “How can your back get worse? You haven’t done anything over then deliver parts all day.”

    Coworker: “Yeah, but sitting makes it worse.”

    (The next day.)

    Coworker: *calls in* “I’m going to be late. I hurt my back this morning.”

    (The next day.)

    Coworker: “I need to leave early. I hurt my back.”

    Me: “No. My back hurts, too. You have to stay as long as I do.”

    Coworker: “But no one in this store has worse back issues than me!”

    Me: “Incorrect. I have had issue with my back since puberty, having constant muscle spasms. [Coworker #2] has a terrible knee, but can still stand and deliver parts without issue. [Coworker #3] has had lordosis, causing her back to form the wrong way. If they can drive and stand then so can you.”

    (45 minutes later.)

    Coworker: “I can’t wait to ride my motorcycle later.”

    Me: “I thought you said your back hurt?”

    Coworker: “It does, but I don’t need that to ride a motorcycle.”

    Me: “Then how do you balance on it without using your back?”

    (He stopped talking to me after that.)

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