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    Category: Lazy/Unhelpful

    Would Be Quicker If Used Carrier Pigeon

    | USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful, Technology

    (I have ordered a new phone from this company, but when I receive the phone, it is programmed for the wrong carrier, even though I had specified my carrier when purchasing. So, I call their customer service. I have been on hold for 15 minutes.)

    Customer Service: “Hello, how can I assist you today?”

    Me: “Hello, I ordered a phone from you for [Carrier] and received a phone for [Other Carrier] instead. I would like to return this phone and have the correct one sent to me.”

    Customer Service: “Okay, let me pull up your order.” *clicking* “All right, I see here that you ordered [Phone] on the special $99 offer if you signed a two-year contract, and you need to return it? What is wrong with it?”

    Me: “I just need to exchange it; you sent me a phone for [Other Carrier] when I specified that I needed [Carrier].”

    Customer Service: “We cannot accept exchanges unless the phone is damaged and you have a care plan for it. How is the phone damaged?”

    Me: “It’s not damaged; you sent me the wrong product, and I would like the phone that is programmed for [Carrier].”

    Customer Service: “Oh, okay, well there is a way to connect your phone to [Carrier]. Let me walk you through it.”

    (Proceeds to have me try to reprogram the phone myself; this takes about 45 minutes.)

    Me: “It’s telling me that I can only connect to [Other Carrier] network and not the one I need. Can you please just send me another phone and I can return this one?”

    Customer Service: “Let me talk to my supervisor.”

    (I am on hold for 30 minutes, and then the supervisor gets on.)

    Supervisor: “Okay, so you need to return your phone and exchange for another phone. How is the phone damaged?”

    Me: “Like I told the rep before, it isn’t damaged; you sent me a phone for [Other Carrier] when I specified [Carrier] on my order. You sent me the wrong phone and I want what I paid for.”

    Supervisor: “Well, our policy is not to return or exchange any items unless there is a factory default.”

    Me: “Fine, your factory defaulted me a phone with the wrong carrier. Why is this so hard to switch out? I don’t understand? It’s fine; the phone is in working order, but my plan is through [Carrier] which was specified on my order, but you sent me a phone for [Other Carrier]. You guys made the mistake; I want it fixed, now.”

    Supervisor: “Let me put you on hold for a few minutes to talk to my supervisor.”

    (I am very frustrated at this point, and am again on hold for almost 45 minutes, so I am seething when the new supervisor picks up the phone.)

    New Supervisor: “Okay, so you need to exchange [Phone] because it is the wrong phone. I am seeing here that you ordered [Phone model]. What did we send you?”

    Me: “Look, this is the last time I am explaining this so you had better listen: I ordered a [Phone] that needed to be compatible with [Carrier]. I received the correct model of phone, but because your company hates competition, you have locked this particular phone only to work with [Other Carrier] which is USELESS to me seeing as how I am with [Carrier]. Look at my order; pull it up in front of you. I will wait.”

    New Supervisor: “I am looking at your invoice.”

    Me: “GOOD, now what carrier does it say on my order? What carrier should my freaking phone been programmed too?”

    New Supervisor: “It is for [Carrier].”

    Me: “Precisely. You sent me a phone for [Other Carrier] that I don’t need. How is this NOT your company’s fault, and WHY won’t you let me exchange it for the phone I actually ordered?”

    New Supervisor: “We will gladly exchange your phone. It will cost—”

    Me: *cutting him off* “—it will cost me absolutely NOTHING because I was not the one in error; it was you. You will pay to ship it back, you will pay to get me my new phone over-nighted, and you will send me a phone for [Carrier] I need.”

    New Supervisor: “I will have to check with my—”

    Me: *cutting him off again* “—you check with them! I will wait. I have already waited d*** near two hours. What’s another 30 minutes of my life I will NEVER get back talking to you idiots?!”

    (After another 20 minute wait, they finally agreed to exchange the phone for the one I wanted, over-nighted it, and I didn’t have to pay an extra dime.)

    The Company Ran Out Of Gas

    | AL, USA | Health & Body, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (My husband and I live in a farmhouse in the country. We frequently smell natural gas in the area and have called the company several times over a period of months. You can smell it around a certain intersection in a car. If the wind is right, the smell can be so strong it can almost knock you out.)

    Me: “Hi, there is a strong smell of gas in [area].”

    Operator: “Please do not plug or un-plug electronic devices and we will have someone over to investigate.”

    (Several weeks later…)

    Me: “Hi, we still smell gas.”

    Operator: “Please do not plug or un-plug electronic devices and we will have someone over to investigate.”

    (Several weeks later…)

    Me: “Hi, we still smell gas.”

    Operator: “Yeah, there’s a gas leak somewhere around there. We haven’t been able to find it, though.”

    Me: “…So, are you guys working on it?”

    Operator: “We can’t do anything more than look for it. We haven’t found it, so we can’t fix it.”

    Me: “…So there is definitely a gas leak in our area, but you can’t find it, so it’s just going to keep leaking?”

    Operator: “Yes.”

    (We moved shortly after that. We’ve been back to the area several times since then and it still smells of gas.)

    Overtime Crime, Part 5

    | Belgium | Bosses & Owners, Lazy/Unhelpful, Overtime

    (The shop I worked at was part of a major chain. The manager and rest of the team were awesome and always friendly. The regional manager though, was a hard-a**. One day, we’re short two people, who called in sick. As a result, there’s only me, another girl, and the butcher. With two hours left on the clock till closing time, the regional manager suddenly turns up.)

    Regional Manager: “So, I heard you had two people call in sick? Okay, I’ll help out a bit.”

    (He went straight for the office in the back to do paperwork. The butcher loved it, since it was originally his responsibility, and he hated it. About an hour before closing, we start some light cleaning, like taking away empty trays and taking out the trash, and cleaning some lesser-used knives. We do this an hour early because we had to clean the entire shop top to bottom, and had two people less to help.)

    Regional Manager: “HEY! Why are you cleaning? It’s not closing time yet!”

    Butcher: “Yeah, but we have less people. We have to clean the entire shop, and remember how you reprimanded us last month because we had too much overtime?”

    Regional Manager: “That’s no excuse! Put everything back! There might be customers coming in!”

    Butcher: *to me* “Nonsense, nobody comes in after this hour, ever. We won’t sell another thing, mark my words.”

    (We put everything back as it was, and wait for closing time. Of course, like predicted, nobody came in. As soon as the clock strikes the hour, we close the door and start cleaning. We have limited time, but are a bit optimistic, since the regional manager is still in the office doing paperwork. We expected him to stay there and count the till and order everything for the next week. However…)

    Regional Manager: “Well, see ya!”

    Me: “Wait what? Where are you going?”

    Regional Manager: “Home. My wife is making dinner.”

    Butcher: “You’re not going to help? Not even the paperwork?”

    Regional Manager: “Nope. That’s your responsibility. It’s bad enough I had to take over from you as it is. Don’t let that happen again!”

    (Of course, we worked late because we had to clean the entire shop with only two people, while the butcher had to do paperwork. We ended up staying only an hour late, but still we got another reprimand for “too much overtime” from the regional manager.)

    Related:
    Overtime Crime, Part 4
    Overtime Crime, Part 3
    Overtime Crime, Part 2

    Pig-Headed About The Sign

    | USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful, Religion

    (Our Navy ship is hosting several Arabic guests as part of a goodwill evolution. While they are on board, to prevent any unfortunate incidents, the cooks have started labeling each meat item with signs in English and Arabic (as well as clip art) to indicate if it is Beef, Chicken, Pork, or Fish.)

    Me: “Why isn’t there a sign for the Calico corn?”

    Cook: “What? Who cares? Why does corn need a sign?”

    Me: “Calico corn has bacon in it.”

    Cook: “So? Are you allergic to bacon?”

    Me: “…we have Arab guests on board.”

    Cook: “So?”

    (Yes, despite all the effort the other cooks had taken with the signage, that one cook just couldn’t understand why a dish that contained BACON should have a label indicating that it was pork-based.)

    Shipping This The Long Way Round

    | NJ, USA | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (My boss has a tendency to assume things are more difficult than they are; related, he also tends to do things in the most difficult way possible, almost on instinct. At the moment he’s prepping a return for some in-office-use products.)

    Boss: “Well, these headsets have to go back to [vendor] because they don’t work.”

    Me: “Okay, leave them there we’ll get to it as soon as we get this batch of orders boxed.”

    Boss: *starts taking everything out of the vendor’s shipping carton to put them into one of our boxes*

    Me: “Whoa, just, leave them there. That box is fine to ship them.”

    Boss: “Oh, okay.” *starts rooting around for the dozens of pieces of packing paper needed to fill the space up*

    Me: “Um…” *realizes what we’re in for* “Hey [coworker] can you pass me that box of packing peanuts?”

    Coworker: “Yep.”

    (He hands it over, I help the boss stack it up, and watch him struggle to do a cross-fold of the flaps before taping it instead of just taping it, stick the paper shipping label down with two layers of clear tape instead of a single one of the waybill envelopes which were right next to him, and then spend three minutes trying to figure out “which pile” it goes into despite us repeatedly pointing out specifically which one to put it on.)

    Me: *once he’s finally done and back over into the office area* “So how long would that have taken us?”

    Coworker: “Dude, we’d already be at our desks by now.”


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