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    Category: Movies & TV

    Miss A Deadline And Its Literally The End Of The World

    | AB, Canada | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Movies & TV

    (This happened a few years ago when the movie ’2012′ was about to come out. The district manager was paying our office a visit, and decided to treat us out to lunch. While enjoying our lunch, an ad for the film “2012″ came on TV.)

    District Manager: “What’s the deal with this movie? Why does everyone think the world’s going to end in 2012?”

    Me: “Oh, that has to do with the ancient Mayan calendar. The calendar actually ends in the year 2012, so a lot of conspiracy nuts believe the world will end that year.”

    District Manager: “Huh. Do we have an exact date in 2012 for when they think the world’s going to end?”

    Me: “I think it’s December 21.”

    (The district manager pulls out his BlackBerry and begins frantically typing. A few seconds later, the smart phones of all the sales staff beep, and they check the e-mail they just got from the district manager.)

    Sales Manager: “Did you just move up the billing deadlines for December 2012 because you think the world’s going to end?”

    District Manager: “It doesn’t hurt to play it safe.”

    This Job Is Just Impossible

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Movies & TV, Musical Mayhem

    (At this store we wear headsets to communicate with each other since it is a big store. This conversation takes place over the headsets as Coworker #1 is following around a suspected shoplifter to make sure they don’t take anything.)

    Coworker #1: “I feel like I’m in Mission Impossible, being all sneaky like this.”

    Coworker #2: *starts humming ‘Mission Impossible’ theme song*

    Coworker #3: “Now you just need to do a duck and roll behind a rack.”

    Manager: “I will give someone $20 if they do a duck and roll on the sales floor right now.”

    (I was back in the fitting rooms getting some very strange looks from customers as I burst out laughing for no apparent reason.)

    Don’t Have The Scope For Cinemascope

    | Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Bad Behavior, Ignoring/Inattentive, Movies & TV, Technology

    (Our local art gallery was showing a special viewing of the classic movie musical “Gigi”. My mother, who loves musicals and adores that movie, decided to take 14-year-old me. The art gallery’s theatre wasn’t a typical movie theatre, and the copy of the movie was in Cinemascope, for which the theatre did not have the right screen. As soon as it started, we knew there was a problem: Maurice Chevalier looked like he was about two feet tall. My mother and I left when we realized that the gallery wasn’t going to fix the mistake.)

    Mum: “We’d like a refund, please.”

    Ticket Taker: “Why?”

    Mum: “There’s a problem with the movie. All the actors look two feet tall!”

    Ticket Taker: “Um … I’ll have to call my manager.”

    Manager: “What’s the problem?”

    (Mum explains.)

    Manager: “We can’t give you a refund for that. Are you sure that’s even what you saw?”

    Mum: “Just wait. There will be more people out here in a minute looking for refunds. Better get ready.”

    Manager: *scoffs*

    (Less than five minutes later, the foyer was full of angry, disappointed movie buffs all demanding refunds.)

    A Discount Is On The Cards

    | Norway | Employees, Health & Body, Movies & TV

    (My friend has spent over a year battling cancer, and due to the effects of almost a year in bed and a severe reaction to chemotherapy, she has to learn to walk again. On one of her trips home, we decide to go see a movie. She’s in a wheelchair, and I’m pushing.)

    Friend: “Hello! We’d like two tickets to [Movie], please.”

    Cashier: “Of course! With the discount, that’ll be [price].”

    Me: “We get a discount? Awesome!” *I grin at my friend*

    Cashier: *to me* “Yes, but I need your card first.”

    Me: “Card? What card?”

    Friend: “We don’t have whatever card you’re talking about.”

    Cashier: “But you should bring your card for trips like this. It gets the companion a discount on their ticket.”

    (Suddenly, I understand what’s going on. She’s referring to a carer’s card.)

    Me: “Ah… I’m afraid you’re mistaken. I’m just here as a friend. We don’t have a card.”

    (I quickly explain what the cashier is talking about to my friend.)

    Cashier: “You can’t get the discount without the card.”

    Friend: “I don’t have one. Can we just buy the tickets, please?”

    Cashier: “Unless you can show me the card, I can’t give you the discount.”

    Me: “No, I’m not here to accompany her. I’m really her friend. We’re going together.”

    Friend: “Exactly what she says! I don’t have a card because I’m not disabled!”

    Cashier: “You really do need to show me the card for this.”

    (At this point, my friend is getting genuinely upset, and I’m not happy, either.)

    Me: “Listen to me. I am her friend. She’s been ill, but this is not permanent. She’s getting out of the chair again, and she does not have a card.”

    (You can see the cashier suddenly understand.)

    Cashier: “I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to upset you!”

    Friend: “It’s okay. I’d just like our tickets.”

    Cashier: “Of course! I’ll get you a different discount as an apology. Feel free to sit anywhere in the theatre. There’s hardly any people.”

    Me: “Thank you. That’s very kind.”

    (We get our tickets, and because there’s still 30 minutes until the movie starts, we decide to head to a store down the street for snacks. Once we’re outside…)

    Friend: “Hey, did you see what kind of discount we got?” *shows me her ticket* “Look, apparently we’re retired!”

    (We had a good laugh about it, and enjoyed the movie as two ‘retirees’ in our early 20s!)

    The Number One Student

    | Tucson, AZ, USA | Coworkers, Movies & TV

    (I work for one of the local police departments. I’m also in training at the time. The trainers mark us on a scale of one to four, four being the highest. The graveyard shift has been slow all night. ‘Law and Order: SVU’ is playing on one of the televisions. Several coworkers are watching the episode, which I have already seen.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker], wanna know how it ends?”

    Coworker: “What? No! Don’t do that.”

    Me: “All right. All right.”

    (A few minutes pass.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker].”

    Coworker: “What?”

    Me: “Somebody gets caught.”

    Coworker: *to my trainer* “Give her all ones tonight!”


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