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  • Baptism By Fired
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  • Category: Rude & Risque

    Would Have Mismanaged The Situation

    | USA | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (Last night, I had to call the police on someone who was drunk and streaking around scaring little children. My manager isn’t too happy. I’m a female.)

    Manager: “Did you really have to call the police on this boy?”

    Me: “Yes. He tried to grab me and security wouldn’t do anything.”

    Manager: “It’s still a little dramatic to call the cops and arrest him. His parents are angry now.”

    Me: “Plus, this boy was 18 and shouldn’t have been drinking anyway.”

    Manager: “Boys will be boys. Next time just handle it yourself, okay?”

    Me: “Me against a full grown adult ‘boy.’ I don’t think so.”

    Manager: “Tch. Girls.”

    (The manager started to say something else but the general manager called for him sternly. He told my manager to shut up.)

    Underwear Is Overwhelming

    | Reno, NV, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (I’m shopping at a large chain clothing store for essentials (shirts, pants, etc.). I gather my things and head toward the checkout where a young, attractive female cashier is working. I set my things down on the counter, and start digging through my purse for money.)

    Cashier: *begins folding clothes* “Hi. How are you today?”

    Me: “Fine, thanks. And yourself?”

    Cashier: “Doing great!”

    (The cashier picks up on of the pairs of underwear I’m purchasing and looks them over before she folds them.)

    Cashier: “Oh, these are cute!”

    Me: “Yeah. That’s why I picked them.”

    Cashier: “I don’t suppose there’s any way I’ll see them on you…”

    Me: “Umm…”

    (I have no issue with anyone’s sexual preferences, but it was such an odd come-on that I just laughed, bought my things, and left.)

    Don’t Give Him Some Sugar

    | Virginia Beach, VA, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (My sister and I are at a popular drive thru fast food chain for breakfast.)

    Server: “Do you want any cream or sugar for the coffee?”

    Sister: “No, thank you.”

    Server: “I thought not. You’re pretty sweet and sugary yourself.”

    (My sister is so thrown off she doesn’t know what to say, so I reach across the car for my coffee and speak up.)

    Me: “Thanks, honey!”

    (Being a guy in my 20s, he seems a little put off. As we drive off I tell my sister:)

    Me: “Next time I’ll have my coffee, hold the creep.”

    Out In A Flash

    | MI, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Holidays, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (My husband and I are on our way home from his grandparents’ house on Christmas Day. We don’t get out that way very often, so we decide to stop at a popular adult bookstore along the way. Once we are there, my husband remembered that he had left his ID at home. We went in, hoping we wouldn’t get carded, as we’re both 22 and quite young looking. When we walked in, the only employee, a male around our age, walks up.)

    Employee: “Can I see your IDs?”

    (I pull mine out, and then gave a big smile to my husband.)

    Me: “See you in a little bit!”

    (The employee checks my ID, and then goes about his business. My husband returns to the car. I call the employee over for help, but he is kind of moody, and unwilling to help much. I then go up to pay. While he was trying to find the barcode for the shoes, I decided to break the somewhat awkward silence.)

    Me: “Do you like working here?”

    Employee: “It’s better some days than others… and I have to work on Christmas. The best part is that I see a lot of boobs.”

    Me: “Oh?”

    Employee: *smiles* “Yeah, girls like to flash me. Especially today, since I have to work on Christmas and all.”

    (He looks down at me expectantly.)

    Me: “That’s nice.”

    (It is silent for a minute, before he bagged up my items. I hurriedly grab the bag, and turn to leave.)

    Employee: *calls out* “Don’t you want to—”

    (I wait until I get in the car and we are down the road before I tell my husband. His only response?)

    Husband: “I told you that you were hot!”

    Dropped The Ball On That One

    | Newton, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (I frequented a store and have had a few run-ins with a strange male employee. He speaks in a monotone and wears a plastic glove on only one hand. I’m buying two chocolate eggs and some sleeping medicine.)

    Me: *puts items on counter and one egg rolls quickly toward the cashier* “Oh, no!”

    Cashier: *catches the egg from falling* “Don’t worry. It didn’t fall on the floor.”

    Me: “Awesome!”

    Cashier: “And it didn’t hit my balls either.”

    (I am speechless and cannot make eye contact. After the rest of the transaction is completed, I go to leave.)

    Cashier: “Goodbye… for now.”


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