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    Category: School

    Getting Out Of Work With Surgical Precision

    , | KS, USA | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Family & Kids, Health & Body, Overtime, School

    (I work in a deli inside of a chain grocery store. I’m always on closing duty which has me at work until well after midnight. I’m also a full-time college student. I’m usually fine going into class on very little sleep, but I don’t want to take tests like that, so I put in for time off on the nights before my final exams, which are all early in the morning. The week before my exams, we’re given our schedules for the following week.)

    Me: “Uh, [Manager], you’ve got me down to work close next Wednesday night. I asked for it off and you approved it, but then you scheduled me.”

    Manager: “Oh. Well, can you still come in?”

    Me: I’d rather not. I have to be up early Thursday morning for exams. It’s just next week; I’m off for the summer so I can work whatever hours you need after that. But, I really don’t want to take important exams on three or four hours of sleep.

    Manager: “Hmm.” *says nothing more and goes back to work*

    (I assume I am still going to have to go in, so decide to just suck it up and hope for the best. Fast forward to the following Wednesday. I arrive for my shift, to find that a coworker who hadn’t been on the schedule is there. She is as surprised to see me as I am to see her.)

    Coworker: “Why are you here? [Manager] asked me to cover for you because you said you couldn’t come in.”

    Me: “Seriously?! She didn’t say anything to me about that. I had asked for tonight off because of my exams tomorrow morning, but she put me down anyway. But, okay, if you’re here I guess I’ll go home—”

    Coworker: “No, we should really talk to a manager to make sure.”

    Me: “All of the managers are gone, I think. One of the store managers might still be here… but we’d better hurry because they won’t be here long.”

    (We manage to find the store assistant manager, who is the only one still in, and explain the situation.)

    Me: “[Manager] hadn’t told me she was having someone cover, but since we’ve got coverage, I’d really like to head home so I can be well-rested for my exams tomorrow.”

    Coworker: “I GUESS I could stay but… my little boy is only five months old and he just had surgery on his poor little feet this morning. I hated to leave him but [Manager] asked…”

    (I’m confused because this coworker had never mentioned her son having surgery scheduled — and she talks incessantly about EVERYTHING related to her son, even an inconsequential sneeze. And why would she have agreed to cover for me if her baby was scheduled for surgery that day?)

    Assistant Manager: “Oh!” *gives me a dirty look then turns back to my coworker* “You go right on home to be with your baby. He needs you.” *turns back to me, and says rather rudely* “Go get clocked in and get to work.”

    (The other closer ended up calling in sick, leaving me to close by myself. I went in to my exams the next morning on under two hours of sleep, and failed them both. The kicker? The bakery manager saw me the next day, heard what happened, and informed me that she saw my coworker and her husband only minutes before I walked in — showing off her not-been-operated-on baby to the bakery employees.)

    Someone Should Have Studied More

    | CA, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, School

    (I’m on a well-known PC company’s website trying to decide if I want to replace my laptop with their tablet or a third party one with the same operating system. I see an online chat button and click it.)

    Rep: “Hi. Thank you for visiting [Company] Website! My name is [Rep]. How may I help you?”

    Me: “Hi! I just had a few questions. I need a tablet for university and I’ve been thinking about the [Company-Specific tablet], but I’m not sure if that’s the best one for me. I’m wondering if one of the other [same OS] tablets would be a better choice, since I’m kinda on a student’s budget.”

    Rep: “I see. I’ll be happy to answer that question for you. Before we proceed, may I please have your first and last name, and your email address?”

    Me: “[My Name] and my email is [email]@university.edu.”

    (We have a very brief chat where the rep is thrown off by my need to run a somewhat obscure software program, so they tell me to call tech support directly.)

    Me: “Thank you very much. I just have one more question. When I was browsing the [Company] site a few days back, I saw student discounts were offered. I can’t find it again. Is there a direct link, or did I just miss out on a limited time thing?”

    Rep: “Are you a student?”

    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 33

    | USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Money, School

    (I work in a warehouse with my boss and a few other employees. My boss has been wealthy her entire life. I am working when she starts to chat me up about college.)

    Boss: “I don’t understand why you’re going to [Local College] instead of one two hours away. It’s a life experience.”

    Me: “Oh, yes, I know. I’s just much cheaper for me to live at home and go to [Local College] until I graduate. I don’t want to be in debt like most college students.”

    (My boss gives me a dumbfounded look.)

    Boss: “Why?”

    Me: “…why?”

    Boss: “Why don’t you want to be in debt?”

    Me: “…”

    Boss: “Debt is the American way. I was $38,000 in debt when I graduated, and I paid it off just fine. It was stupid of you to go to [Local College].”

    Related:
    From NotAlwaysRight:
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 32
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 31
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 30

    A Cup Is Half Empty Service

    | Washington, DC, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful, School, Top

    (While on an eighth grade class trip around the capital we stop at a very popular coffee shop. Most of my classmates order hot chocolate or other very sugary drinks. I order black coffee, however, but find a problem with it.)

    Me: “Um… Excuse me, there seems to be a problem with my drink.”

    Barista: “I knew you wouldn’t like actual coffee. Would you like for me to switch that out for a hot chocolate for you?”

    Me: “No, I was actually wondering why I paid for a large and you barely filled the cup up half-way.”

    Barista: “Well, I left some room for cream and sugar in it. I just figured you would need a lot, trying to act grown up and all.”

    Me: “Look I ordered a large coffee, and I paid for a large coffee. Could you please just fill it up like I asked.”

    Barista: “No. I don’t want to waste coffee when you are just gonna pour it out.”

    Me: “Fine, then give me my money back and I’ll take my business elsewhere.”

    Barista: “No. You ordered a drink and got it. You have to pay for things.”

    Me: “No. I ordered a large and got less than a small. Now, please get me either my money or your manager.”

    Barista: “Ugh, fine.”

    (After getting the manager I explained the situation and was given both my money back and the full cup of coffee.)

    Little Yellow Lies

    | Telford, England, UK | Employees, Food & Drink, Health & Body, History, School, Tourists & Travel

    (I work as a magical clown at a theme park aimed at children aged eight and under. Between shows I wander around the park chatting to everyone, drumming up interest for my next performance. The weather this day has quite a bit of rain. I happen to pass by the medieval castle where a small party of school children are standing under the parapet. Their escort, a cast member dressed as Captain Hook, is trying to stop them from doing something.)

    Captain Hook: “Stop that. It’s not clean!”

    (The children are stood under some guttering that is leaking. The rain run-off from the parapet is flowing out of the gap in the guttering, and into the mouths of the children stood below.)

    Captain Hook: “Please, stop it!”

    Kid #1: “It’s just rain water.”

    Me: “Hey kids!” *they turn and look at me* “You see Robin Hood and his friends up there?”

    (I point up to the top of the castle, where cast members dressed as Robin Hood and his merry men are placed.)

    Kids: “Yeah?”

    Me: “Well, they live up there on the tower. They don’t have a toilet up there, unfortunately, so when they need to go for a wee, where do you think they go?”

    Kid #2: “Over the wall?”

    Me: “No, they go on the floor. Now, all that wee then runs off through the gaps in the wall into the guttering…”

    Kids: “Oh…” *realizes* “EWWWWW!” *cue much spitting*

    Me: *to Captain Hook* “Lying to kids is the best part of my job!”


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