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  • There Is Such Thing As A Free Meal
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    Category: School

    A Cup Is Half Empty Service

    | Washington, DC, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful, School, Top

    (While on an eighth grade class trip around the capital we stop at a very popular coffee shop. Most of my classmates order hot chocolate or other very sugary drinks. I order black coffee, however, but find a problem with it.)

    Me: “Um… Excuse me, there seems to be a problem with my drink.”

    Barista: “I knew you wouldn’t like actual coffee. Would you like for me to switch that out for a hot chocolate for you?”

    Me: “No, I was actually wondering why I paid for a large and you barely filled the cup up half-way.”

    Barista: “Well, I left some room for cream and sugar in it. I just figured you would need a lot, trying to act grown up and all.”

    Me: “Look I ordered a large coffee, and I paid for a large coffee. Could you please just fill it up like I asked.”

    Barista: “No. I don’t want to waste coffee when you are just gonna pour it out.”

    Me: “Fine, then give me my money back and I’ll take my business elsewhere.”

    Barista: “No. You ordered a drink and got it. You have to pay for things.”

    Me: “No. I ordered a large and got less than a small. Now, please get me either my money or your manager.”

    Barista: “Ugh, fine.”

    (After getting the manager I explained the situation and was given both my money back and the full cup of coffee.)

    Little Yellow Lies

    | Telford, England, UK | Employees, Food & Drink, Health & Body, History, School, Tourists & Travel

    (I work as a magical clown at a theme park aimed at children aged eight and under. Between shows I wander around the park chatting to everyone, drumming up interest for my next performance. The weather this day has quite a bit of rain. I happen to pass by the medieval castle where a small party of school children are standing under the parapet. Their escort, a cast member dressed as Captain Hook, is trying to stop them from doing something.)

    Captain Hook: “Stop that. It’s not clean!”

    (The children are stood under some guttering that is leaking. The rain run-off from the parapet is flowing out of the gap in the guttering, and into the mouths of the children stood below.)

    Captain Hook: “Please, stop it!”

    Kid #1: “It’s just rain water.”

    Me: “Hey kids!” *they turn and look at me* “You see Robin Hood and his friends up there?”

    (I point up to the top of the castle, where cast members dressed as Robin Hood and his merry men are placed.)

    Kids: “Yeah?”

    Me: “Well, they live up there on the tower. They don’t have a toilet up there, unfortunately, so when they need to go for a wee, where do you think they go?”

    Kid #2: “Over the wall?”

    Me: “No, they go on the floor. Now, all that wee then runs off through the gaps in the wall into the guttering…”

    Kids: “Oh…” *realizes* “EWWWWW!” *cue much spitting*

    Me: *to Captain Hook* “Lying to kids is the best part of my job!”

    Don’t Count On A Student Discount

    , | France | At The Checkout, Employees, School, Theme Of The Month

    (In my university, student cards are magnetic and quite expensive to make. In order not to make us pay for a new one every year, they simply put a sticker stating the current school year above the former one. I’m currently in my second year. I’m at the checkout of a sub shop, different from the location I usually go to.)

    Cashier: “What will it be with your sandwich?”

    Me: “I’ll have a student price meal please, with soda and a cookie.”

    Cashier: “Sure thing. Can I just see your student card, please?”

    (I show my card, thinking she’ll just look at it like they do in the location I usually go to. Instead, she takes it from my hand and frowns.)

    Cashier: “Do you think you can fool me?”

    (She angrily peels off the “2013-2014″ sticker from my card, while I open big eyes.)

    Me: “Wait, please don—”

    Cashier: “Do you think you can just put on a sticker on your old card and still get student prices?”

    Me: “Wait, that sticker is from the university… You can see that the font and color match. Do you think I’d go through such trouble for €1 off a meal? Please, put it back in place…”

    (Instead, she just wipes the sticker off on her apron, then hands me back my card and presses a few keys on her register.)

    Cashier: “That will be full price for you.”

    Me: “Thank you for making my card invalid. Here’s your money. Thanks for nothing.”

    (I leave with my full price meal and go to my university in the afternoon. Thankfully, they didn’t mind putting a new sticker on my card. Since then, I always went to my usual location.)

    Just Lost Their Chemistry

    | MI, USA | Bigotry, Employees, Math & Science, School

    (I am 20 years old and opening a new bank account. The account manager is trying to make small talk with me while the information processes. I should note I appear to fit the ‘skinny blonde girl’ stereotype.)

    Manager: “So, are you in school?”

    Me: “Yes. I just started my third year.”

    Manager: “And what are you studying?”

    Me: “I’m doing a double major in chemistry and physics.”

    Manager: *stops typing and scrunches her face up a little* “Oh… wow. Really? Science? Are you sure that’s not too hard for you?”

    Me: “Um, yes. I really enjoy it, and I seem to have a knack for it. I just aced a course on relativistic physics.”

    Manager: “I didn’t expect you to say that. I expected something fluffy like interior decorating or fashion design. If you could excuse me for a second, I, uh, need to go get something from the back.”

    (She walks away. Someone else came to finish up the paperwork as the original woman ‘was suddenly called away.’)

    Studiously Avoiding Responsibility

    | Long Beach, CA, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful, School

    (I am in high school. During lunch, seniors are allowed to go out to eat. Due to not having a class scheduled afterwards, my girlfriend and I can actually take our time to get a proper meal. We go to a fast-food place that is fairly close to the school.)

    Me: “Hello, I’d like three chicken sandwiches, a large fries and two small sodas.”

    Cashier: “Alright, sir, that will be [price].”

    (We pay and move to the back of the restaurant to wait for our order. Since the restaurant is fairly crowded, we decide to simply pull out a pair of books and read for a bit. After a while I decide to see how our orders are going.)

    Me: “Sorry to bother you, but we’ve been waiting fifteen minutes for our order; are you guys backed up or is there something wrong?”

    Cashier: “Don’t you rush us kid. Can’t you see we have a lot of orders to handle?! You’ll get your food when it’s ready and don’t you bother me again.”

    (Not wanting a fight, I simply go back to reading. After another 10 minutes have passed, the restaurant has cleared out of the other students, and my girlfriend and I look up to see the Assistant Manager.)

    Assistant Manager: “Look kids, we can’t have you loitering around. Now the [high school] lunch period is almost over, so why don’t you get back to class before you’re truant.”

    Girlfriend: “Whoa, were not leaving without our food. How long does it take to make three sandwiches and a side of fries?!”"

    (My girlfriend hands the Assistant Manager our receipt.)

    Assistant Manager: “Excuse me, miss.”

    (The assistant manager goes into the back room and we hear some mumbling, followed by a yell.)

    Assistant Manager: “30 minutes ago! Why hasn’t this order been filled out yet?!”

    (After several minutes scrambling, we finally get our order from a rather embarrassed assistant manager.)

    Assistant Manager: “I am so sorry for the delay. Apparently one of our cashiers didn’t see you in the restaurant anymore, and figured you had already left and simply cancelled your order in the queue. If you don’t have time to eat, I can easily refund your money and offer you a gift card for $10.00 on any future orders.”

    Me: “We actually do have time to eat due to our schedules.”

    Assistant Manager: “Well that’s a relief. But I’ll still give you the card. Sadly, one of my employees resents the heavy student lunch rush, and frequently ‘forgets’ orders so he doesn’t have to deal with them.”

    (I find out a few week later that the employee in question is transferred to the graveyard shift so he wouldn’t have to deal with ‘annoying students’ anymore. Now he’s stuck dealing with stoners and hangovers.)


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