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    Category: Technology

    A Minor Business Flaw

    | NJ, USA | Job Seekers, Technology, Theme Of The Month

    (I am fresh out of tech school and looking for a job. I apply to everything I can find that has ‘computer’ in the job title. While some of the interviews are doomed from the start, looking for ’5-10 years’ experience’ with software that was barely two years old or something, this one really takes the cake. I am in the lobby while I and the other gentleman for an interview are waiting to get called in.)

    Me: “Man, I’m kinda nervous about this.”

    Him: “Yeah, it’s sorta exciting though, isn’t it? Breaking into the business!”

    Me: “Well yeah, it’s just a little intimidating, every place I’ve been to so far has sprung up some new, crazy ‘requirement’ that was never mentioned before come the interview.”

    Him: “I know, right? I mean I just got my BA in Computer Sciences, and so many places disrespect that!”

    Me: “Wait, Computer “Sciences? Programming, networking or hardware?”

    Him: “No, just general theory.”

    Me: “Oh. You know this job is for a junior software engineer, right?”

    Him: “Oh yeah, yeah! I messed around with some V-Basic too, I should be good.”

    (I specifically knew this job required knowledge of C++, Visual Basic, database management and several other complicated systems, all of which were part of my tech-school training. Then I go into the interview, only to be told that it wasn’t a “requirement” but it would have been “helpful” if I also had “at least a minor in business”. Guess what mister I-can’t-even-program-a-login-screen had?)

    It Will Click For Him One Day

    | The Netherlands | Bosses & Owners, Ignoring/Inattentive, Technology

    (I’m a UI designer. I sketch wireframes of screens before they get implemented in our software. I’m just on my way out, when I run into my boss.)

    Boss: “Hey, still here? You know what’s funny?”

    Me: “I was just about to leave, but… tell me?”

    Boss: “You know that [Sales Rep] and I tend to work late, and sit here after office hours? We have discussions sometimes, you know, and we come up with the most funky things! Good things happen. You won’t believe it!”

    (This announcement is going nowhere, but I know my boss and just nod understandingly. He goes on to make his point:)

    Boss: “You know, just last evening, we were sitting here, and [Coworker] just showed us this software you designed, and it looked really good! It was really nice!”

    (I can’t believe Coworker has implemented the screens yet, as we have discussed the revisions only this morning and he is very strict in his work. Still, my boss keeps saying how ‘funky’ and ‘nice’ it was.)

    Me: “I cannot really believe [Coworker] has implemented them yet. But eh, maybe he started already… so… thanks for liking it.”

    Boss: “I can show it to you right away. He’s still in the office!” *runs off and taps [Coworker] on the shoulder*

    Boss: “Hey, [Coworker]! Show her the screens!”

    Coworker: “Those weren’t screens. Those were the sketched wireframes.”

    Boss: “But it was there and all… and you clicked it… you made it click! It clicked!”

    Coworker: “Really can’t be. Those were really only the wireframes.”

    Boss: “But it clicked…”

    Not His eBay Day

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Technology

    (My husband has been bidding on an item on eBay. He is in a bidding war with another user. He wins the auction and gets a confirmation email from the seller.)

    Husband: “I won that auction but have sent an email back refusing to pay for it and reported the seller to eBay.”

    Me: “Why? What happened? I thought you really wanted the item.”

    Husband: “He sent me the confirmation email but not from the right account. It was sent from the account of the guy that was bidding against me. The idiot not only scammed me but scammed himself out of a sale. I put it on his feedback, too…”

    Needs A New Motherboard

    | PA, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Technology

    (Part of our job as a help desk agent is, unfortunately, having to set up new users in a few programs. One program in particular only allows one session, so oftentimes, we end up getting kicked out by each other. I happen to witness this exchange.)

    Coworker: “Anyone in [Program]?”

    Team Leader: “I think your mom was.”

    Started Suspecting After The Ferrari FU9000

    | Brampton, ON, Canada | Employees, Liars/Scammers, Technology

    (I answer the telephone at my work and get scam calls all the time. Instead of trying to call them out on their scam I decide I would scam them back instead.)

    Scammer: “Hello. I am calling from [Well Known Photocopy Manufacturer] to confirm that we have updated information on file. Can you tell me the make and model of your photocopier?”

    Me: “Certainly I can help you with that! It’s a Bugatti FU7510.”

    Scammer: “Bu- Errrr, I’m sorry. Could you repeat that, please?”

    Me: “Bugatti FU7510.”

    Scammer: “Hmmmm, I don’t seem to have that on my list. Are you sure that’s correct?”

    Me: “Oh, yes. The machine is right in front of me and it clearly says Bugatti FU7510.”

    Scammer: “That is strange. I have never heard of a model called Bugatti before.”

    Me: “Really? Well we’ve had this machine for a few years now and it’s the best one we’ve ever had. Very, very fast and quite stylish, too!”

    Scammer: “Really? Okay, well I’ve made note of it. Thank you.”

    Me: “Oh you are MOST welcome! Have a great day!!”

    (Every time they call I come up with some name for the make and model off the top of my head but I always start the model number with ‘FU’ for obvious reasons.)


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