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  • Will Never Claim Ignorance
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  • Category: Themed Giveaway

    The Daddy Of All Trust Issues

    | Reno, NV, USA | Coworkers, Technology, Themed Giveaway

    (Our computer system has been having trouble lately, causing messages to pop up on some computers regarding the computer’s lack of ‘trusted network connection.’ While at work one day I see an out-of-order computer with a sign on it.)

    Sign: “Out of Order: Trust Issues.”

    (There is a note scribbled below the sign.)

    Note: “Better than daddy issues…”

    Dropped The Ball On That One

    | Newton, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (I frequented a store and have had a few run-ins with a strange male employee. He speaks in a monotone and wears a plastic glove on only one hand. I’m buying two chocolate eggs and some sleeping medicine.)

    Me: *puts items on counter and one egg rolls quickly toward the cashier* “Oh, no!”

    Cashier: *catches the egg from falling* “Don’t worry. It didn’t fall on the floor.”

    Me: “Awesome!”

    Cashier: “And it didn’t hit my balls either.”

    (I am speechless and cannot make eye contact. After the rest of the transaction is completed, I go to leave.)

    Cashier: “Goodbye… for now.”

    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 5

    | London, England, UK | Employees, Family & Kids, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (I am at my dentist of 10 years having a crown put in. Since the dentist is quite far from home my sister drives me and sits in the waiting room whilst I’m having my crown put in. This conversation happens with the dentist’s assistant.)

    Assistant: “So, is that your girlfriend outside waiting for you?”

    Me: “No, that’s my sister…”

    Assistant: “Oh… you look good together. You should date!”

    (Neither of us could make eye contact with the assistant after that.)

    Related:
    From NotAlwaysRomantic:
    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 4
    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 3
    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 2

    The Poster Child For Creepiness

    | Erie, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Employees, Family & Kids, Themed Giveaway

    (My husband and I are shopping at a large store where you can buy things in bulk. The guy cashing us out notices the lady in line behind me starting to unload her cart. She only has a few items, all which are heavier, and a small child.)

    Cashier: “Ma’am, you can just leave everything in the cart.”

    Me: “Even the child?”

    Cashier: *in a low growl* “ESPECIALLY the child.”

    (I looked at him stunned, as I was just getting ready to say that, in a similar manner. I was laughing all of the way to the car. He totally made my day!)

    A Misunderstanding Of Under-aging

    | SK, Canada | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Rude & Risque, Themed Giveaway

    (I am training a new guy in the kitchen who is in his mid-30s, almost twice my age. The boss’ daughter is employed as a waitress up front, and occasionally comes into the kitchen to bring in dirty dishes. Every time she does, the new guy stops paying attention to what I’m telling him and stares at her.)

    New Guy: “Wow, I would love to get me some of that.”

    (This goes on for a while. He looks, stares, and often has some kind of comment about her physical attributes.)

    Me: “You know that’s the boss’ daughter, right?”

    New Guy: “That doesn’t bother me.”

    Me: “How old do you think she is?”

    New Guy: *pauses and thinks for a moment* “The way I see it, as long as a girl is old enough to get into the bar it doesn’t matter.”

    Me: “Come on, guess.”

    New Guy: “22?”

    Me: “She just turned 14 last week.”

    (He never said anything about her ever again.)


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