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    Just Brought Death To Her Career

    | NV, USA | Bosses & Owners, New Hires

    (I’m showing a new secretary around the office. We go to get on the elevator, and when it arrives I see our chief operating officer (COO) in it. Our COO is very tall, thin, and has heavy scarring on his face.)

    Me: “Good morning, Mr.—”

    Secretary: “Ew, I don’t want to ride with him. Let’s take the next one.”

    Me: “What?!”

    Secretary: “He looks like the Grim Reaper. We’ll just take the next one.”

    (The COO looks at her for a moment, then very calmly presses the ‘doors close’ button. I gape at the new secretary.)

    Me: “What the h***, [Secretary's Name]?”

    Secretary: “What? He was weird-looking.”

    Me: “You realize that that was the chief operating officer of the company?!”

    Secretary: “Really? Ew.”

    (She was fired before the end of the day.)

    Liars & Scammers Themed Giveaway Roundup

    | Not Always Working | Liars/Scammers, Roundups, Theme Of The Month

    Liars & Scammers Themed Giveaway Roundup! Here’s a final roundup of stories from last month’s themed giveaway!

    1. Their Device Passed The Acid Test (1,759 thumbs up)
    2. Secret Shop, Public Flop (1,245 thumbs up)
    3. An Honest Scam (1,430 thumbs up)
    4. Their Jobs Are As Stuffed As Their Crusts (1,023 thumbs up)
    5. Something Doesn’t Compute (1,448 thumbs up)

    PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    Women Of The Night-Shift

    | USA | Bosses & Owners, Criminal/Illegal

    Manager: “[My Name], a customer complained about your service yesterday. He said that he wasn’t fully satisfied.”

    Me: “Oh, that guy. Well, he wanted me to get him a prostitute.”

    Manager: “So?”

    Me: *jaw drops* “So, prostitution is illegal in this state!”

    Manager: *shrugs* “So? What the police don’t know won’t hurt. Your job is to make sure the customer is fully satisfied in every way, and you chose not to!”

    (He wrote me up for not pleasing the customer, and I began looking for another job!)

    Deaf To Reason, Part 2

    | New Castle, IN, USA | Bigotry, Employees, Food & Drink

    (I am 26 years old, and going in a restaurant with my sister. I am also deaf, so she translates for me.)

    Me: *signing* “Can I have a [Brand] pizza?”

    Sister: “Sure.”

    (The waitress comes up, and my sister orders.)

    Sister: “Can I have a chocolate milkshake and [Other Brand] pizza? And she’ll have [Brand) pizza."

    Waitress: "Okay."

    (The waitress comes back with our food. My sister soon has to go to the restroom. I am on my own when the waitress comes up. She says something and I try to sign I'm deaf, but she moves her lips again very quickly. I can't understand what she's saying.)

    Me: *signing* "Stop!"

    (What they say next is what the manager and my sister told me. The manager begins coming up from behind the counter.)

    Waitress: "Oh, so you're f****** better than everyone are you? You think you can't say thank you, can you? You ungrateful little b****! I ought to slap you, you b****!"

    Manager: "[Waitress!]”

    (She proceeds to raise her fist, and I put my hands up defensively. I am completely surprised.)

    Manager: “[Waitress]! Stop that! What’s she done wrong?”

    (The waitress turns to the manager.)

    Waitress: “I asked her if she was enjoying her meal, and she stared straight ahead! She’s ungrateful! And I bet she won’t pay a tip!”

    (My sister comes out the bathroom.)

    Sister: “What’s going on?”

    Manager: “The waitress was about to attack this woman.”

    Sister: “She’s DEAF!”

    (My sister signs to me.)

    Sister: “It’s okay, [My Name]; everything will be all right.”

    Waitress: “Well she should get a hearing aid; not my problem.”

    (We never go back there until she moves.)

    Related:
    Deaf To Reason

    Sample Not So Simple

    | Colchester, VT, USA | Crazy Requests, Employees, Food & Drink

    (An employee with samples approaches me.)

    Employee: “Miss, would you like to try some [juice brand]?”

    Me: *smiling* “No, thank you.”

    Employee: “Why not?”

    Me: “Well, I brushed my teeth five minutes ago; I don’t think juice would taste very good.”

    Employee: *angrily* “Well, you do plan on drinking again at some point today don’t you?”

    Me: “Yeah…”

    (I start walking away, but the employee starts shouting up the aisle at me.)

    Employee: “That’s fine; I respect the customer’s choice!”


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