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  • July's Theme Of The Month: Thrown Under The Bus!

    Aggravating But Also Aware

    | TX, USA | Employees, Language & Words, Top

    (A number of years ago I was doing some service work for a particularly obnoxious client. I had done work for him before, and he was always obnoxious.)

    Me: “And here’s your invoice.”

    Customer: “I noticed this on previous invoices and wondered what the 10% A & I charge was for.”

    Me: “That’s an ‘aggravation and irritation’ charge for having to deal with your sorry personality.”

    Customer: “I can understand that. You do good work and are reliable, so keep charging that and I’ll keep calling you.”

    Saved By The Bell

    | USA | Employees, Top

    (I am working the front desk at a hotel.)

    Me: “Front desk. How can I help you?”

    Guest: *speaking quickly* “Need a bellman, please.”

    Me: “Certainly, what room?”

    Guest: “…I don’t know.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I need a room number to send him to.”

    Guest: “No, no. I need a bellman, please.”

    Me: “Yes, but where are you? What room are you staying in?”

    Guest: “What? No, I’m not staying in the hotel. I just need you to transfer me. I need a bellman.”

    Me: “Transfer you? I’m sorry, sir, I don’t understand. You want me to put a bellman on the phone?”

    Guest: *enunciating clearly* “Please transfer me to Doctor Anita Bellman’s room.”

    Me: “OH! Oh, my god! I’m sorry! Right away!”

    Quit, Never To Return

    | MA, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners

    (I recently quit my job. The manager was insane, paranoid, rude, and all around mean spirited. As much as I didn’t want to go back to the store, I had to do a return and was already at the mall with my home store in it. I start feeling sick as I walk in the door and this is what happens. I have about two bags worth of clothes.)

    Manager: “You’re not returning all that here!”

    Me: “Um, yes, I am. I never had a chance to give it as a gift and now I have no use for it.”

    Manager: “Well, that’s really rude of you!”

    Me: “How is it rude?”

    Manager: “You should return it at another store. It’s really rude of you to return it here when you know it affects our numbers!”

    Me: “Not that it’s your business, but I was already up here. I’m not going to go out of my way on my way home just because you’re mad about it.”

    (She then proceeded to take forever with the returns, screwed it up, and had to start over. I ended up doing my own return! I emailed corporate to let them know about the morale they were allowing in their stores!)

    When Your Coworkers Are Zombies


    2011-02-23-zombie-co-workers

    Eyebrow Low-Brow

    | Reading, England, UK | Employees, Health & Body

    (I go to a beauty salon to get my eyebrows waxed. I’d only been to this place once before.)

    Beautician: “Are you ready to come downstairs?”

    Me: “Yep.”

    (I follow her down to the waxing room.)

    Beautician: “Have you been with us before?”

    Me: “Yeah, just once.”

    Beautician: “Oh, okay. Who were you with last time? Was it me or [Coworker]?”

    Me: “It was [Coworker].”

    Beautician: “Okay.” *she starts laying out various items on the bed* “There’s your towel to cover your legs when you get under the bed.”

    (This really confuses me, but I don’t say anything. She put baby wipes on the bed as well.)

    Me: “I’m sorry. [Coworker] didn’t give me any of this stuff last time.”

    Beautician: “Oh! Okay, well the wipes are for sanitary reasons. It’s important that you’re clean down there—”

    Me: *mortified* “Um… I’m here for an EYEBROW waxing!”

    (The beautician freezes before we both burst out laughing.)

    Beautician: “You have just made my day!”


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