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  • November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

    December Theme Of The Month: The Holidays & The New Year!

    Not Always Working | Announcements, Theme Of The Month
    Introducing December’s Theme Of The Month: The Holidays & The New Year!

    Entering is easy:

    1. Submit a funny or interesting story about this month’s theme: The Holidays & The New Year. Share a story about the holidays and the New Year!
    2. At the end of the month, we’ll feature our favorite Theme Of The Month stories in a roundup!

    The (Square) Root Of The Problem

    | KY, USA | Coworkers, Lazy/Unhelpful, Math & Science

    (I’ve been looking in a stack for a recipe that I’ve printed off multiple times in the past month, but keeps getting lost.)

    Me: “Ugh, how do we lose so many of these recipes?”

    Coworker: “I don’t know.”

    Me: “Well, why not? You’re supposed to know. Why else would we keep you?”

    Coworker: “Well then, the answer is the square root of laziness times the cosine of disorganization.”

    (It was the nerdiest way to say our coworkers were lazy slobs, but it made my day!)

    Orange Is The New Black

    | ON, Canada | Coworkers, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (I have some coworkers that are unbelievably messy and dirty. They wear the same clothes day after day and never clean up their personal spaces. Everything is covered in crumbs, spills, junk, and the worst part, FOOD. They just leave food sitting around for weeks, and we’re not talking hard candy here, either. It has been complained about to managers but nothing changes. One day I can’t take it any more and confront one of them about it.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker], how long has that orange been sitting around?”

    Coworker: “I don’t know. It’s still good, though.”

    Me: “It looks a little soft.”

    Coworker: *picking it up and squishing it* “It’s still good.”

    Me: “I don’t think fruit is supposed to squish like that.”

    Coworker: “It’s fine.”

    Me: “The skin has black marks all over it and it’s no longer orange.”

    Coworker: “No, it’s still good. I’ll eat it.”

    Me: *giving up* “Okay, then.”

    (Several days later…)

    Coworker: “I threw out that orange today, just for you, so you’d feel better. It was still good though!”

    Me: *facepalm*

    Working Hard Is A Bug’s Life

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Employees, Top

    (I’m a 14-year-old girl and go with my father to a business convention a week before school starts. Here people set up booths to try and promote their business to other important people from America, Canada, Africa, parts of Asia, Europe, Australia, and Indonesia. The booths tend to give out free stuff, like pens, sticky notes, and some other stuff. It’s the last day and the booths want to get rid of as much stuff as possible so they don’t have to ship it back. I go to a booth promoting a company that deals with pest control.)

    Me: *looks at toy cockroaches*

    Exhibitor: “Take as many as you want.”

    Me: *takes two*

    Exhibitor: “You know what? I think there’s an open box under this table.” *looks under table and pulls out an unopened box*

    (The cockroaches are about two inches long. The box says 24 DOZEN.)

    Me: *speechless*

    Exhibitor: “Go ahead. Take it.”

    Me: *takes it*

    Exhibitor: “Now you have at least 24 dozen cockroaches to give to your friends.”

    Me: “Thank you!”

    Exhibitor: “Thank me when you’ve pranked a few of your teachers first.”

    The Job Is Not So Secure

    | USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (Our hotel is near a stadium, so a lot of the guests become unruly especially after an event there. Because of this, the manager just hired a security guard to control them when they’re being too loud and noisy.)

    Guests: *causing a ruckus*

    Me: “[Security], go and make those guests calm down. Other guests will complain.”

    Security: “Why?”

    Me: “Because… it’s your job?”

    Security: “Fine.”

    (He goes but instead of telling the guests to settle down, he brings them to me.)

    Security: “Here.”

    Me: *sighs* “Dear guests, we ask that you please keep it down since other are trying to sleep.”

    Guests: “Okay.”

    (All night long, I’m trying to calm the guests down and instead of helping, the security guard just stares and doesn’t do anything. One guest that the guard brings even tries to grab me, and he still does and says nothing. Finally…)

    Me: *to security guard* “Okay, you DO know that your job is to help me with these out of control guests, right?”

    Security: “Yeah… I am.”

    Me: “No, you’re not. You’re just bringing them to me and not telling them yourself at all.”

    Security: “That’s what I’m supposed to do.”

    Me: “No, you’re supposed to help control them.”

    Security: “I AM!”

    (Suffice to say, he didn’t last a week.)

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