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    Me Two

    | England, UK | New Hires

    (I am starting a part-time secondment at a museum, to work in their legal team. I have met one member of the team, a woman, before and know that there is also a man on the team. As I don’t have a pass, I have to wait for someone to get me so I can start. I am sitting in the main hall, in smart clothes, when a man comes up to me.)

    Man: “Hey, uh, are you [My Name]?”

    Me: “Oh, yeah, I am.”

    Man: “Great. And you’re starting work today, right?”

    Me: “Yes, that’s me.”

    Man: “Great. I’m Ed. It’s good to meet you.”

    (I’m a little confused as I’d thought the other lawyer in the team had a different name but decide I must be mistaken.)

    Me: “Good to meet you, too. I’m looking forward to starting.”

    Man: “Wonderful. Now, I’m so sorry we’re late, but I’ll take you up to Ancient Egyptology now.”

    (I know the legal team share a floor with an ancient history department so I assume he means he’ll take me up to that floor.)

    Me: “Oh, that’s no problem. I’ve not been here long.”

    Man: “Good. Um, I’m afraid Tam isn’t available until 11, but I’ll show you the ropes till then… maybe let you see some of the mummies.”

    Me: “Huh?”

    Man: “You look confused.”

    Me: “I don’t know a Tam.”

    Man: “You are [My Name], right? Starting today?”

    Me: “Ye-es but, uh, I’m not waiting for Tam.”

    Man: “Oh. Maybe I’m mixed up. I was told there’d be a young lady called [My Name] waiting for Tam who’s starting with us in Ancient Egyptology.”

    (Finally, the penny drops.)

    Me: “Oh, no, there’s been a mix-up. I’m waiting for [Lawyer] so that I can start a secondment with the legal team. Definitely not working in Egyptology!”

    Man: “Oh! Man, what are the chances of there being two [My Names] starting a job here on a Thursday? You even match the description Tam gave me of you! Oh dear, I hope the legal team rescue you soon then. In the meantime, I’m going to see if I can locate my [My Name].”

    (He wanders away. I get picked up by the lawyer about 15 minutes later. As she takes me to get my security pass, we happen to pass the man.)

    Man: “Oh good, you’ve been found. You’re doing better than me. I still can’t find my [My Name]…”

    (I heard later that the other ‘me’ was found eventually.)

    Poor Person Work Ethic


    0e3493be51b77ae47a4b2d9ef409ad1d4170364c135bfcc50c44286d98b55f4d

    Will Soon Be Jobless

    | Paris, France | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I need help finding the right office in a large public administration. There is an information kiosk with clearly posted hours (10:00 – 18:00). I walk up to it but it is closed with no sign or anything to explain it being closed. While standing there, another man comes up and asks me if I know why it is closed. I tell him I do not and we talk briefly (and quietly) about how to find what we need. Suddenly the door to the kiosk flies open:)

    Worker: “You need to be quiet. We are trying to get work done in here.”

    Me: “We are looking for information.”

    Worker: “Just be quiet. You are keeping us from doing our job!” *slams the door*

    Jetting Home

    , | PA, USA | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers

    (I am working a closing shift on a Sunday night. Normally this is a very slow shift at our restaurant, but for some reason we are experiencing a rush of customers. After talking to a few of them, my manager deduces that these customers are all coming from a specific location.)

    Manager: “These people are all coming home from the New York Jets game.”

    (I find this incredible, since the Jets’ stadium is a 2.5-hour drive from our location. However, I decide to get a bit creative in expressing my shock.)

    Me: *apparently loud enough for customers to hear* “Are you kidding me?! There are people that LIKE the Jets?!”

    My Cup Runneth Over With Bad Behavior

    | Oxford, England, UK | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink

    (My professor and I are meeting at my favorite coffee shop for tutorial. At this point, I have studied there at least twice a week all year and the staff all know me and my order by sight, so I am a consistent regular. We walk in and take a table; my professor has, among an armload of things, an empty to-go coffee cup from another shop in the city.)

    Me: *at the counter* “Hello, can I have my usual, please?”

    Manager: “Only if you get THAT out of here!”

    Me: “…I’m sorry?”

    Manager: *points at the empty cup among my professor’s things* “THAT. I WILL NOT HAVE IT IN MY STORE!”

    (Confused and rather mortified, I went back to my professor and sheepishly relayed this message, which she found as odd as I did. I got my order and we finished our tutorial there, the offending cup having been thrown away as the manager continued to give us suspicious looks. It had been my favorite place, but after that I did not go back again.)


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