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    Missing Identity

    | UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I had dropped my wallet, including ID, bus pass, debit card, etc. on the bus. After searching my apartment top to bottom, I call the bus depot, and am told they have it. With no bus pass or method to access my money, I have to beg a ride from a neighbor. When I finally arrive at the depot, they are about 10 minutes from closing the help desk windows.)

    Me: “Excuse me, but I was told my wallet was here. Could you please help me?”

    Worker: “We’re closing.”

    Me: “Yes, I know, in 10 minutes. I just need to pick up my wallet, please. It’s black, bi-fold.” *I list a few other notable features, including the fact that my ID, is in there*

    Worker: *heavy sigh, holds out her hand* “ID?”

    Me: “It’s in the wallet.”

    Worker: “No, I need you to show me your ID, so I can go find your wallet.”

    Me: “My name is [My Name], and my ID is In the wallet that I’m here to retrieve.”

    Worker: “I can’t give you anything out of Lost & Found without an ID. Go home and get it.”

    Me: “You’re not listening. My ID isn’t at home, it is IN the wallet, in YOUR Lost & Found.”

    Worker: “Look, it’s a security issue. I can’t just go handing out our Lost & Found to anyone who asks. I need your ID.”

    Me: “Then go get it! You have it, not me!”

    Worker: *finally looks away from her computer screen* “Excuse me?”

    Me: “I’m here to get my WALLET, which contains my ID. You have both those things in your Lost & Found. I already called and checked earlier. I confirmed that my wallet was turned in by the driver of the bus I ride every day. His name’s [Name]. So can you please go get the wallet, check the ID in it, and then give it back to me?”

    Worker: “But you need to show me your ID! How do I know you are who you say you are without your ID?”

    Me: “You ALREADY HAVE my ID! It’s in YOUR Lost & Found!”

    Worker: “But how do I know it’s YOUR ID? You could be anybody, just claiming the wallet is yours.”

    Me: “The picture on my driver’s license is less than two years old. My military ID is even newer. You should have no problem telling it’s me. What’s more, I can tell you exactly what’s in the wallet, and exactly where everything is.”

    Worker: “Look, no ID, no wallet. I won’t break the rules. And besides, we’re closing. Come back tomorrow with your ID and get it then.”

    Me: *finally realizing there’s no getting through to her, I place my hands flat on the ledge* “Could you please go get your manager?”

    Worker: “Fine, but she’s just going to tell you to go get your ID!”

    (It takes a few minutes for her to get the manager, which is surprising, since the entire building is less than 25’X15′.)

    Manager: “I understand you have a problem with our Lost & Found procedures.”

    Me: “Not at all. I called earlier, and was told my wallet was here. I’d like to pick it up, please. My ID is in the wallet, along with [the rest of the contents]. It’s a black, bi-fold wallet.”

    Manager: “Yes, I’m the one you spoke to earlier. Let me go get that.” *walks off to the Lost & Found, followed by the worker*

    Worker: “But she doesn’t have her ID! We can’t give her anything from the Lost & Found with her ID!”

    Manager: “Are you thick? Her ID is RIGHT HERE!” *she opens my wallet, revealing my ID*

    Worker: *snatches my wallet, stomps over to the window, and stare – more like glares – back and forth between my and the ID for a good long while*

    Manager: “Oh, for pity’s sake!” *takes the wallet from the worker, and slides it through the window’s access port* “Here’s your wallet, Miss [My Name]. Sorry for the inconvenience!”

    Me: *just glad the whole ordeal is finally over* “THANK you! Really. Have a nice day.”

    Manager: “You, too.”

    Worker: *hollering as I walk away* “Next time, BRING YOUR ID!”

    It’s A Numbers Game

    | Denmark | Bad Behavior

    (I work with customer service/refunds and returns for a large electronics store. I am handling customers alone while my colleague is getting lunch. I have one particularly troublesome customer, but she is the only one waiting. While I help her, the store starts filling up with other customers, and I hear one of them asking the others:)

    Customer #1: “Is the queue on a number system?”

    Customer #2: “No, it isn’t.”

    (Once I finished with the first customer, I leave the register for a brief period, came back and in a clear and loud voice say:)

    Me: “46! Number 46!”…

    (Every single customer started frantically looking around for the numbers dispenser, while I tried my utmost to keep a straight face. When it finally dawned on them, all the customers started laughing and the hassle of waiting was forgotten for a while.)

    Doesn’t Quite Get How Jail Works

    | USA | Bizarre/Silly, Employees

    (I’m working the overnight shift in the main control room at the jail. After 11 pm, the lobby is locked, and anyone who wants to come in has to push a button that rings into the control room. I get an alert for that button.)

    Me: “Can I help you?”

    Drunk Guy: “My friend was arrested earlier tonight! You’re holding him against his will!”

    (I look at my sergeant, who is sitting in the control room with me.)

    Me: “We’re holding 650 people against their will. 680 if you count the officers, because let’s face it, none of us want to be here either.”

    (My sergeant laughed but suggested I not mention that to the drunk guy outside.)

    And Don’t Watch ‘Final Destination’ Before Boarding Either

    | Preston, England, UK | Employees, Movies & TV, Tourists & Travel

    (I am waiting for my prescription and happen to overhear a conversation between a customer and cashier:)

    Customer: “Oh, I’m going travelling round Europe.”

    Cashier: “Oooh, have you ever seen the film Hostel?”

    Customer: “No…”

    Cashier: “Don’t watch it.”

    Winding Down The Call

    | NJ, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (We have had a string of tornadoes run through our state about a week before this call:)

    Me: “Hello?”

    Caller: “Hello, this is [Caller] from [Electric Company]. Someone in your household called to report a faulty streetlight a couple weeks ago and I’d like you to rate our efficiency on solving the problem.”

    Me: “Oh… I wouldn’t know. See, the day you guys came and fixed the light, a tornado came and ripped it out of the ground. It’s currently sitting across the sidewalk.”

    Caller: “Oh… Well, on a scale of 1-10, how satisfied were you with our efficiency in solving your problem?”

    Me: “…”


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