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    An Original Way To Pass The Blame

    | Houston, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners

    (I am 21 and take a temp job organizing paperwork for a major lawsuit involving a construction firm and several of its subcontractors. I love the work, and many of the people are nice. My boss, while being a fun and interesting person to hang out with, is a terrible supervisor.)

    Boss: “Hey, [My Name], here’s another original document to add to the current batch.”

    Me: “All righty! Where should I put it in?”

    Boss: “Just the next opening will be fine, but be very careful with it as it’s an original with signatures.”

    Me: “Sure thing.”

    Boss: “Oh, and here’s a copy of it, but we don’t need this one.”

    (At this point she takes the original document and tears it in two.)

    Boss: “Oh, my God! What have you done!”

    Me: “I didn’t do anything! You just tore the original!”

    Boss: “You should not have given me the original to destroy! Now we have to index the copy! I thought you were smarter than this!”

    Me: “But, [Boss]! The documents haven’t left your hands!”

    Boss: “Don’t try to shift the blame, [My Name]! I saw what you did!”

    (This wasn’t the first time such a thing happened or the last. Luckily, my National Guard unit activated soon after and I never went back!)

    Musically Arrested

    | Whitehorse, YK, Canada | Criminal/Illegal, Musical Mayhem

    (I am working the door at a karaoke bar, which is perfect for me because I love to break out into song at random times. Because we have a couple unruly patrons, the cops are called. When the officers arrive, I am outside on a smoke break and decide to have a little fun at them.)

    Me: *singing* “I shot the sheriff, but I didn’t shoot the deputy…”

    Police Officer: *without missing a beat, sings right back at me* “I fought the law, but the law won. I fought the law, but the law won!”

    The Ultimate Bye

    | HI, USA | Language & Words

    (I work in the section next to our busiest doors to the outside. I say ‘Hi!’ and ‘Bye!’ in succession to people going in and out, until one time when, with a cheery smile, I said:)

    Me: “Die!”

    (Luckily I don’t think anyone noticed my use of the wrong consonant!)

    Time To Wake Up And Smell The Chai

    | AK, USA | Bad Behavior, Employees, Food & Drink

    (I am out with some friends at a coffee shop that has some of the best baristas in town. Because I do not like coffee I always order something else to drink, such as tea or a chai latte.)

    Me: “Hello, I’d like a medium chai latte, please.”

    Barista: “Sure, no problem. Can I get your name?”

    Me: “[My Name].”

    (We find a table and wait, and our drinks are ready within a few minutes. I take a sip of my chai latte, and tastes neither right or good, but I can’t quite place why. I take another sip and realize that it has coffee in it. I take it back up to the barista.)

    Me: “Hi, my chai latte tastes bitter. Did you put coffee in it?”

    Barista: “Oh, yes! It tastes much better that way.”

    Me: “But I don’t like coffee, which is why I asked for a chai latte. Could you please re-make it, without the coffee?”

    (A manager walks by with a stack of clattering dishes and mishears what I said.)

    Manager: “I’m sorry, but the Chai latte doesn’t come with coffee in it.”

    Me: “I know; that’s why I ordered it.”

    Manager: “Why are you asking for it to be re-made with coffee?”

    Me: “Because there’s coffee in this, and I don’t like coffee!”

    Manager: *to barista* “Why did you make it with coffee if she asked for a chai latte?”

    Barista: “Because it’s better that way!”

    Manager: *sighing* “Please re-make it without the coffee.”

    Barista: “Well, I like it with coffee!”

    (The manager gave him a hard look, and he correctly re-made my drink without further commentary. My friends and I haven’t seen that barista since!)

    Mismanaging The Money

    | England, UK | Job Seekers

    (I interview for a position in a company. The company seems disorganised, and the interview process is very poor. I eventually get a call back.)

    Caller: “Hi, is this [My Name]?”

    Me: “Speaking.”

    Caller: “This is [Caller] from [Company]. I’m calling about your interview.”

    Me: “Okay, yes.”

    Caller: “We would like to make you an offer of amount [£1000 above my asking rate].”

    Me: “Oh, great. No thanks.”

    Caller: “Sorry, did you say no? It’s more than you asked for. Have you found another job?”

    Me: “No, no. I’m still looking.”

    Caller: “So why are you refusing the job?”

    Me: “Well. to be honest with you, despite the fact that you left me waiting around for nearly quarter of an hour, and despite that I was subject to a quiz that I wasn’t warned nor prepared for, the job requirement and what you expect for the applicant just don’t match up.”

    Caller: “I don’t follow.”

    Me: “You say you are looking for an engineer, but looking around and talking to your staff, you need a manager there. I just don’t think I can make the difference you need in that role.”

    (I’m beaming inside, as that sounded (out loud at least) like an intelligent technical response, completely pulled out of the air. I know I can do the manager job, but it is a different pay scale completely.)

    Caller: “Well, you could do those bits on top of your normal job..”

    Me: “Unpaid, unrecognised, and not on the job description?”

    Caller: “Err, yes, that does sound a bit silly, doesn’t it?”

    (I wrap up the call. She states that she will go away and talk to her boss. I get another call.)

    Caller: “Hi, [My Name]. I spoke to my boss who said that he can change the job description to include those extra roles.”

    Me: “The same title?”

    Caller: “Yes.”

    Me: “No extra money?”

    Caller: “Err… yes.”

    Me: “No, I don’t think so.”

    Caller: *sounding deflated* “Oh.”

    (I didn’t hear anything from that company again, but I kept getting called from several different recruiters, telling me how perfect I would be for that role and how urgent it is that they get someone, but never any more money and always the same title.)

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