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    Very Bad Reception, Part 10

    | ON, Canada | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I work for a market research company in a call centre. We are hired by other companies to conduct their customer satisfaction surveys. Sometimes there are specific people we need to speak to and other times we just need to speak with someone who has general knowledge of the services. In this instance I’m calling a law office.)

    Me: “Hi, my name is [My Name] and I’m calling from [Company] on behalf of [Their Electric Company]. May I please speak with someone who is knowledgeable about the day-to-day service that you receive?”

    Secretary: “What do you want? We don’t want to buy anything! You don’t even work for [Electric Company]!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. No, I do not, but we’ve been hired by [Electric Company] to complete these surveys. I’d just like to ask a few questions about the reliability of service and your satisfaction with the company. I can assure you I’m not selling anything. I’m just looking to speak with someone who knows about the quality or service. I know that might be vague. Maybe someone who would call if there were a problem?”

    Secretary: *almost mockingly* “[Lawyer] won’t want to talk to you. We don’t care about your survey.”

    Me: “I don’t mean to bother you but it would be nice to speak with him anyway to be sure.”

    Secretary: “Fine, I’ll transfer you but he’ll just hang up.”

    (I get transferred to the lawyer and explain why I’m calling.)

    Lawyer: *enthusiastically* “Oh! Yeah, that’s no problem. If the questions aren’t about specifics of the bill or anything I’m sure my secretary would be happy to answer your questions! I’ll transfer you back to her.”

    (He transfers me back and has obviously told her to complete the survey.)

    Secretary: *sounding annoyed* “Okay, fine. I’ll do your survey.”

    (And that is why I don’t always give up right away. This happened more than once and many times with the boss completing the survey him/herself.)

    Related:
    Very Bad Reception, Part 9
    Very Bad Reception, Part 8
    Very Bad Reception, Part 7

    Just Called To Say We Called

    , | Vitória, ES, Brazil | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (My cellphone provider used to call me several times a day to offer their ‘awesome’ services. I got fed up and told them to stop. It took a while and I had to involve the regulatory agency.)

    (Phone rings.)

    Me: “Hello?”

    Telemarketer: “Hi! It’s [Telemarketer] from [Provider]…”

    Me: “I asked to be let out of your call list.”

    Telemarketer: “Yes! We are calling to ask you to get back to our offer service!”

    Me: “…?”

    Telemarketer: “You’ll never miss an amazing offer ever again!”

    Me: “…am I supposed to be laughing?”

    (I’m still trying to get them to stop.)

    Geography Skills Suffering From A Tokyo Drift

    , | USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Ignoring/Inattentive, Money, Tourists & Travel

    (I’ve somehow ended up on ‘high security’ from my credit card company. As such, even though the card I carry is meant specifically for people who travel abroad frequently, I have to call in and let them know when I’m going abroad so my card will work outside of the US. I call to tell them about an upcoming trip.)

    Me: “Hi. I’m calling because I will be traveling abroad soon, and I need my card to work while traveling.”

    Representative: “We can certainly put a travel notation on your account, and your card will work in your destination. Where will you be traveling?”

    Me: “My final destination is China, but I will be transiting through Tokyo and Hong Kong on my way there. Can you set it up so that my card will work in Tokyo, Hong Kong, and mainland China during [dates]?”

    Representative: “Certainly. Please hold momentarily.” *comes back after a minute* “You’re all set for your trip.”

    (A week later in Narita airport…)

    Cashier At Restaurant: “I’m sorry, ma’am, your card was declined.”

    (Fortunately she was nice enough to let me go to an ATM and withdraw funds from my work card to pay the bill. Upon returning home, I call my bank again…)

    Me: “Yes, I called before my latest trip and specifically asked that my card be available for use in Tokyo, Hong Kong, and China. However, my card was declined in Tokyo, and the only reason I can figure is that you failed to allow use of my card in Japan. I’m not extremely upset, but I’d like to know what I can do to make sure my card works when I travel in the future.”

    Representative: “Let me check the notes… Oh. Oh, Oh… I’m so, so sorry. It appears that the previous rep didn’t understand your travel information, and left a… uh… rather unsavory note about it.”

    Me: “Are you joking? This card is for people who TRAVEL! What did she say in the note? I need a good laugh.”

    Representative: “Before I say this, I want your permission and acknowledgement that you will not hold me responsible for coarse language.”

    Me: *now chuckling* “Go ahead. I won’t be offended, and I promise you are in the clear, no matter what you say.”

    Representative: “She wrote, ‘This dumb b**** made up countries called ‘Tokyo’ and ‘Hong Kong.’ Card has been activated for use in China. Fraud alert level has been increased for any other foreign use.’ It also appears from this that your card wouldn’t have worked in Hong Kong, since our system recognizes that separately from mainland China, but if she so much as started to type Hong Kong, it would have come up… Did you also have problems in Hong Kong?”

    Me: “No, I didn’t try to use my card there since I was only in that airport for a few minutes before traveling on. Thanks for the laugh. Buy that ‘b****’ a map, would you?”

    Representative: “We have noted your comment, and I’m sure the issue will be dealt with promptly.”

    (And I now make sure to name the *country* every time I call in. Silly me for thinking that most people would know Tokyo is in Japan and that Hong Kong is a real place…or ask if they didn’t.)

    Needs A New Motherboard

    | PA, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Technology

    (Part of our job as a help desk agent is, unfortunately, having to set up new users in a few programs. One program in particular only allows one session, so oftentimes, we end up getting kicked out by each other. I happen to witness this exchange.)

    Coworker: “Anyone in [Program]?”

    Team Leader: “I think your mom was.”

    When New Hires Become New Fires

    | Greenville, SC, USA | Bad Behavior, New Hires

    (We have a group of new hires coming into our call center who are a bit overdressed for the positions they have been hired for. I have been at this job for two years, and am at work wearing a shirt and jeans, sneakers, etc. I run into two of the new hires in the break room.)

    New Hire #1: “Man, would you look at that.” *points towards me as I make coffee*

    New Hire #2: “Yeah, what the h***, man? How’d he even get an interview?”

    (I realize that they think I am a new hire like them, and finish making my coffee while they speak about me like I’m not here.)

    Me: *turning to them* “I got my interview three years ago, and I blew them out of the water. Good luck making your 90 days with an attitude like that.”

    (I walked past them, coffee in hand. I didn’t expect either one to last longer than a month.)


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