• Don’t Play With Fire
    (970 thumbs up)
  • May's Theme Of The Month: Movie Mayhem!

    Very Hard Drive

    , | Lexington, KY, USA | Coworkers, Rude & Risque, Technology

    (I worked the support line for a large PC company. One night a woman calls in who has the breathiest, sexiest voice I’d ever heard and she is relaying my instructions to her boyfriend. I mute my phone and grab my friend.)

    Me: “[Coworker]! I need your help!”

    (Coworker plugs her headset into my phone.)

    Me: *unmuting* “Okay, ma’am, let’s boot into safe mode and see where the problem is. Press F9 over and over as fast as you can.”

    Customer: *to her boyfriend* “Ohhhh, baby, you gotta go faster! Hit it faster, baby! FASTER!”

    (Coworker’s eyes go wide and stifles a giggle.)

    Coworker: “Holy s****, [My Name], what did you drag me into?”

    Me: “Are you kidding? When I tell this story later no one would believe it if I didn’t have a witness.”

    (Coworker started to protest but stopped and gave the ‘good point’ acceptance nod. Sure enough for the rest of the night our whole floor went to her to confirm my ‘porncall’ story wasn’t made up.)

    Questioning Your Security Methods

    | CA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Money

    (A few years ago I called into a customer service center to alter service on my account.)

    Representative: “How may I help you?”

    Me: “I’d like to remove [service] from my account as I’m not using it anymore.”

    Representative: “Sure thing. Can I get your account number?”

    Me: “[Account number].”

    Representative: “And your name?”

    Me: “[My Name].”

    Representative: “Great. Now to verify your identity, can you please tell me your security question?”

    Me: “…excuse me?”

    Representative: “Can you please provide me with your security question?”

    Me: “I don’t know my security question. You’re supposed to provide me the question so I can answer it.”

    Representative: “I’m sorry, sir, but we need you to provide your security question in order to verify your identity before I can continue.”

    Me: “But that makes no sense. Nobody makes a customer memorize the question, only the answer. There are countless possible questions each company can ask, and I can’t be expected to memorize both the question AND the answer.”

    Representative: “Sir, if you can’t provide me the security question to verify your identity, I’ll have to terminate this call.”

    Me: “I’ll save you the trouble.”

    (I called back a few minutes later and got a different rep who understood how security questions work.)

    Just Realised How That Sounded

    | WI, USA | Bosses & Owners, Health & Body, Technology

    (I was mute for three years due to functional dysphonia. Because most of my employment history was as an agent in various call centers, it was tough finding a job during that time. Fortunately, I was able to land a job as a QA specialist at a call center which required only listening and typing, not talking. At one point the building maintenance guys are doing something to the wiring in our building, and the phone at my desk, which shouldn’t have even been connected, starts ringing.)

    Me: *instant-messaging a manager* “My phone rang!”

    Manager: “It can’t ring. Yours isn’t even connected.”

    Me: “But it’s ringing!”

    Manager: “So answer it.”

    Me: “How?”

    Manager: “What do you mean ‘how’? Just pick up the phone and t— Never mind.”

    Living In A Police Box State

    | AZ, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Geeks Rule

    (Where I work, we are required to wear badges to get in the building and identify ourselves. The lanyards do not have to be from the company. I have recently bought a Doctor Who inspired lanyard with the words ‘Police Box’ printed all over it. This happens when we get a new administrator.)

    Admin: “What is that?” *points to my lanyard*

    Me: “Oh, it’s my Doctor Who lanyard. The Doctor flies around time and space in the TARDIS, which is disguised as a police box.”

    Admin: “Well, you can’t wear that anymore.”

    Me: “Why not? ”

    Admin: *sighs* “Because it says ‘POLICE’ on it. People might mistake you for an officer! I won’t have the company name soiled because you got arrested for impersonating a police officer!”

    (I continued to wear the lanyard anyway. I guess when you’re hardly on the floor of a call center with 200 employees, you tend to forget little things like criminal activity!)

    Growing Up Resourceful Is Priceless

    | WI, USA | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Money

    (I’m currently working at a call center where everyone makes more than minimum wage, but not by much. I tend to be frugal and get along ok on this wage. There are times I’ve had to get by on less, but I know a lot of my coworkers really struggle. On this particular morning, there is a visitor from corporate who is chatting with some of my coworkers. I’ve just walked in in the middle of the conversation.)

    Visitor: “Man, when I get back home I need to have my nails done again. It costs me $80, but it’s worth it!”

    (Everyone is taken aback slightly at the price.)

    Visitor: “I should be mad at my grandmother; she’s the one who got me into that. She took me to get my first manicure when I was 13. I did the math once, $80 every three weeks, I’ve spent nearly $20,000 on manicures over the years!”

    Coworkers: “….”

    Visitor: “You know, you don’t think about that when you’re getting one. I mean, it’s only $80.”

    Coworkers: *still not sure how to react without being rude*

    Visitor: “I’ve had to cut back on some other stuff, though. This economy and all. I’ve cut my maid service down to every 3 weeks instead of every 2, I cancelled my membership to the tanning salon, and I even downgraded my membership at the fitness center. I’m saving over $3,000 a month just with little changes like that!”

    (The visitor gets called into a meeting. The rest of us still aren’t sure what to make of her.)

    Coworker #1: “$80 is a full day’s paycheck for me.”

    Coworker #2: “I don’t think I spent $3,000 on my whole car!”

    (Later that evening I was talking with my mother and told her the story. Afterwards…)

    Me: “Hey, Mom?”

    Mom: “Yes?”

    Me: “You remember those times when I was a kid and we were struggling, and we had to be really resourceful to make it work because we didn’t have enough money to go around?”

    Mom: “Yes.”

    Me: “I want to THANK you for those times!”

    Page 2/2712345...Last
    « Previous Page
    Next Page »