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    The Mistress Of Suspense

    | USA | Coworkers, Movies & TV

    (I am talking to my coworker about movies.)

    Coworker: “I really like horror movies. To look at me you’d think I liked pop music and girly movies but I really like horror.”

    Me: “So do you like Hitchcock, then?”

    Coworker: “I haven’t seen that one, actually.”

    Me: “…”

    Lack Of Con-Text And Lack Of Management

    | Columbus, OH, USA | Coworkers, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’ve just transferred to a new location, but I’ve been with this company for two and a half years, meaning I have far more experience than most of my coworkers. I am having some trouble adjusting to the laziness of this new crew, as I have come from a store where the crew is tight-knit and always on task. This happens during a rush with a line in the store and a line in the drive-thru. My bar support has just hurt himself and had to leave the floor, leaving me, one barista on the window, and one barista at the front. I have been answering the drive-thru when my coworker doesn’t, which is nearly every time.)

    Me: “Thanks for choosing [Company]. What can I get for you?”

    Customer: *rattles off large order* “…and do you have any chocolate chip cookies left?”

    Me: “I’m not sure; let me check on that for you.” *turns off headset and yells to coworker* “Do we have any chocolate chip cookies left?”

    Coworker: *silent*

    Me: *while working my way frantically through a line of 20+ drinks* “[Coworker]! Do we have any chocolate chip cookies?” *I look up to see she is texting and ignoring me*

    Coworker #2: *calls to me while working with a line of customers at the front* “No, we’re out of chocolate chip.”

    Me: *back on the headset* “I’m so sorry, we’re out of chocolate chip. Could I get you oatmeal?”

    Customer: “No, my kids hate oatmeal. Do you have brownies?”

    Me: “Let me check for you.” *turns off headset* “[Coworker], please check if we have brownies.”

    (My coworker is still ignoring me and texting with a line of drinks sitting and waiting to be passed out to the customers at the window.)

    Me: “[COWORKER]! Seriously?! I can’t take the orders, check the pastries, make the drinks, AND pass the drinks out! YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING TOO!”

    (My coworker bursts into tears and runs to the back, leaving me and Coworker #2 to deal with this mess. Later, after the whole ordeal is finished and we’ve finally gotten all the customers taken care of (and half the drinks given away for free because of wait times), Coworker emerges back out onto the floor and shoot a smug look at me. Moments later, I am called to the back by the manager.)

    Me: “Hey, [Manager], what’s up? You needed to see me?”

    Manager: “[Coworker] said you screamed at her on the floor when she was working as hard as she could. She also said you called her lazy and worthless.”

    Me: “Honestly? I did yell at her, but I never called her lazy or worthless. We were in the middle of a massive rush and she was texting and ignoring everything I was asking her. She wasn’t even taking orders! I yelled that she needed to help me, because I was already way behind.”

    Manager: “Well, you need to apologize to her. I won’t write you up this time. But you need to remember you’re a team.”

    Me: “…Seriously?”

    (I started looking for a new job that day.)

    This Coffee Is Flat-line

    | Inland Empire, CA, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Food & Drink

    (I am at a well-known coffee chain getting my personal tumbler filled with my favorite new summer drink.)

    Me: “I’ll have a Cold Brew.”

    Cashier: *to barista making drinks* “She wants a Code Blue!… Wait, did I just say that?”

    Me: “GIMME A COFFEE, STAT!”

    Red It And Weep

    | NC, USA | Ignoring/Inattentive, Language & Words

    (My friend and I stop for some drinks on the way back from the library. She places her order.)

    Barista: “And your name, for your drink?”

    Friend: “Bren.”

    (I look at her, as I’ve never heard her use this particular variant of her name.)

    Friend: “It’s the name I’ve been giving out for stuff like this. It’s just easier.”

    (We go to wait, and our drinks are made pretty quick.)

    Friend: “What the- look at what they put for my name!”

    (It reads “RED” but it’s the same drink she ordered and was done right after mine.)

    Me: “Don’t worry; I’ve had people screw up my name much worse.”

    Not My Cup Of Tea

    | England, UK | At The Checkout, Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    Me: “Hi, can I get a small latte and a small cappuccino please to take away.”

    Barista: “Yeah, sure.”

    Me: “Oh, sorry, do you have small cups?”

    Barista: “…Well, yeah.”

    (He makes the coffee, but uses the medium cup.)

    Me: “Sorry to be a pain but can you put it in a small cup please?”

    Barista: “What? No, just take it.”

    Me: “Look I don’t want to be a pain but, medium cups don’t fit in the cup holders in the car.”

    Barista: “Well, I made it in a medium cup so…”

    Me: “So… can I have a small cup, please? I don’t want to spill my hot coffee all over my lap.”

    (Silence falls over the coffee shop; the customers are staring at the barista, who is just giving me a blank look of confusion.)

    Me: “Fine, I’ll do it myself.”

    (I manage to reach over the counter, just managing to reach a paper cup. I slowly pour the coffee into the smaller cup.)

    Me: “I don’t think that was too much to ask, was it?!”

    Barista: “Idiot.”

    Next Customer: *loudly* “Can someone else serve me, please?”

    (I saw that same “barista” cleaning tables but never behind the counter again.)


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