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    Causing Dis-Scent

    , | OH, USA | Coworkers, Holidays, New Hires, Theme Of The Month

    (I am asexual, and my coworkers have been extremely respectful of it. Several seasonal workers have been hired. During Christmas, I get a new scent lotion that I am wearing.)

    Me: *walks to the back to get sauces*

    New Hire: *sniffs* “You stink.”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    New Hire:  ”You stink.”

    (I briskly walk up to the front, where a coworker I am very close to is.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker #1], do I smell bad?”

    Coworker #1: *sniffs* “No? Are you wearing [Scent Name]?”

    Me: “Yeah.”

    Coworker #1: “Smells good.”

    (The new hire from the back comes up to the front, where Coworker #2 is. Coworker #2 relates the rest of this to me later.)

    New Hire:  ”Hey, [Coworker 2]? I need some help.”

    Coworker #2: “Sure, kid.” *goes to the back* “What is it?”

    New Hire: “I tried to hit on [My Name], but she seemed disgusted.”

    Coworker #2: “What’d you say?”

    New Hire: “I said she stinks, you know, like good perfume.”

    Coworker #2: “…kid, that’s the wrong way of doing it. And [My Name] is asexual.”

    New Hire: “So she goes both ways?”

    The Great Mushroom Slaughter

    , | WV, USA | Awesome Workers, Bizarre/Silly, Food & Drink

    (I’ve ordered a chicken meal with a side of breaded mushrooms.)

    Server: *at drive through* “Sorry for your wait. We kill our own mushrooms.”

    They’re Driving You To (The Wrong) Drink

    , | Portland, OR, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (My boyfriend and I are in a packed drive-thru to get dinner for ourselves and his mother. When we pull up to the speaker, I order each of us meals with medium fries and three drinks: a rootbeer with no ice, a rootbeer with ice, and a Sprite. We pull up to the pay window:)

    Cashier: “So you ordered the [five meals with popular energy drink].”

    Me: “Erm, no…”

    Cashier: “Okay, [children's meal]?”

    Me: *lists of a few menu items we ordered*

    (The cashier calls over a manager since she cannot seem to find our order. My boyfriend and I are mildly bemused but shrug it off as first-day flustered-ness. We finally get our food.)

    Boyfriend: “Oh wow, they really skimped us on fries.” *holds up a half-full, small container of fries*

    Me: “Yeah, and I think we’re gonna have to split your root beer.” *takes sip* “Scratch that. This is Coke.”

    Boyfriend: “At least our food turned out okay… Is [Mom]‘s sprite supposed to be blue?!”

    (It was, in fact, the energy drink from the first order. And since we were already on the freeway and the line had been so packed, we couldn’t go back and fix any of it.)

    Not Quite The Cream (Soda) Of The Crop

    , | Adelaide, SA, Australia | Bad Behavior, Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (My mother and I go to the drive-thru to get a particular brand of drink that isn’t sold at many of the fast food chains. I wouldn’t call it an unusual drink but it’s not the brand’s most popular flavour.)

    Mum: “Can I have two brown cream sodas?”

    Cashier: “That’s not a thing. We don’t sell that here.”

    Mum: “But we buy it here all the time.”

    Cashier: “We don’t sell that. Ee only have sarsaparilla. I don’t know why you’re asking for that. It just sounds weird.”

    Mum: “Go talk to the other cashier, currently making coffees. He’s sold it to me before.”

    (The cashier looks at him and back at us, she does not move.)

    Me: “Look at the fridge. I can see it from here. It’s next to the sarsaparilla.”

    Cashier: “I don’t know why you want this weird drink.”

    Mum: “Look, why don’t you just go over and have a look.”

    (Lo and behold, the drinks are there. She picks them up and takes them to the register.)

    Cashier: “I don’t know why it’s called brown; this drink is weird.”

    (We paid and left, still bewildered at what she had said. For the record, it’s called brown because it is brown.)

    I’ll Pay The (Age) Difference

    , | Ottawa, ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Employees, Love/Romance

    (It should be noted that I look a bit older than I am at 5’6″, and my boyfriend looks younger than he is, but is 5’11″.)

    Cashier: *as I’m getting my wallet to pay* “Oh, are you mother and son?”

    Both Of Us: “What?! No!”

    Cashier: “Oh… He just looks so young, and you…”

    Me: “He’s my boyfriend!”

    Cashier: “Oh… You’re THAT type!”

    Boyfriend: “I’m only younger than her by two months!”

    Cashier: “What…?”

    Me: “And I’ve known him since we were both five years old!”

    Cashier: “And you’re the same age?”

    Both Of Us: “Yes!”

    Cashier: “I’ll… go see how your food is coming along.”

    Boyfriend: “I feel insulted…”

    Me: “I know how you feel.”


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