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    Not Quite The Cream (Soda) Of The Crop

    , | Adelaide, SA, Australia | Bad Behavior, Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (My mother and I go to the drive-thru to get a particular brand of drink that isn’t sold at many of the fast food chains. I wouldn’t call it an unusual drink but it’s not the brand’s most popular flavour.)

    Mum: “Can I have two brown cream sodas?”

    Cashier: “That’s not a thing. We don’t sell that here.”

    Mum: “But we buy it here all the time.”

    Cashier: “We don’t sell that. Ee only have sarsaparilla. I don’t know why you’re asking for that. It just sounds weird.”

    Mum: “Go talk to the other cashier, currently making coffees. He’s sold it to me before.”

    (The cashier looks at him and back at us, she does not move.)

    Me: “Look at the fridge. I can see it from here. It’s next to the sarsaparilla.”

    Cashier: “I don’t know why you want this weird drink.”

    Mum: “Look, why don’t you just go over and have a look.”

    (Lo and behold, the drinks are there. She picks them up and takes them to the register.)

    Cashier: “I don’t know why it’s called brown; this drink is weird.”

    (We paid and left, still bewildered at what she had said. For the record, it’s called brown because it is brown.)

    I’ll Pay The (Age) Difference

    , | Ottawa, ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Employees, Love/Romance

    (It should be noted that I look a bit older than I am at 5’6″, and my boyfriend looks younger than he is, but is 5’11”.)

    Cashier: *as I’m getting my wallet to pay* “Oh, are you mother and son?”

    Both Of Us: “What?! No!”

    Cashier: “Oh… He just looks so young, and you…”

    Me: “He’s my boyfriend!”

    Cashier: “Oh… You’re THAT type!”

    Boyfriend: “I’m only younger than her by two months!”

    Cashier: “What…?”

    Me: “And I’ve known him since we were both five years old!”

    Cashier: “And you’re the same age?”

    Both Of Us: “Yes!”

    Cashier: “I’ll… go see how your food is coming along.”

    Boyfriend: “I feel insulted…”

    Me: “I know how you feel.”


    Providing A Stripped Down Service

    , | Dothan, AL, USA | At The Checkout, Bosses & Owners, Health & Body, Rude & Risque

    (It is 1999, and I am a cashier at a fast food restaurant in the local mall that is known for their fried chicken sandwiches. I am two months pregnant at the time. A very large woman approaches my register, wearing a skimpy two-piece outfit and accompanied by a male carrying a clutch style purse. She proceeds to order two of our most popular sandwich combos.)

    Me: “That will be [price].”

    Her: *turning to the male* “Baby, pay the lady.”

    (After searching the purse for a minute…)

    Him: “The money is not in here!”

    Her: “Yes, it is. Dump it out on the counter.”

    (He dumps the purse and the female searches with no luck.)

    Her: “Hang on. I think I put it in my bra.”

    (She digs around but comes up with no money.)

    Me: “We can also take a check.”

    Her: “I don’t use checks. I got paid last night at the club. I have the money.”

    (She starts patting herself down and when she feels her back area…)

    Her: “I found it! Must have stuck it in my panties.”

    (As she started digging into her panties, a wave of morning sickness hit me and I had to excuse myself. I ran into the kitchen area and told the manager to finish with the guest up front. When I returned, my manager was washing the money in our dish sink with sanitizing solution and told me to never do that again. He said the money was wet and smelly. Turns out the female was the star performer at the local strip club.)

    Scream Your Fried Lungs Out And They Still Won’t Listen

    , | England, UK | Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (We have just got home after picking up a bucket of chicken; I go to take a bite when I notice something awful. I ring the branch.)

    Me: “Hi, I’ve found what looks like cooked internal organs in my meal. What can you do about it?”

    Worker: “Hang on. Let me get the manager.”

    Manager: *very young sounded voice* “Err… hello.”

    Me: “Yes, I’ve found something in my food. I don’t know what it is but it looks like a lump of lung. What can you do for me?”

    Manager: “Err… Do you want me to replace it?”

    Me: “Hang on. You are proposing that I stop eating my family meal, get in my car, and return a chicken leg? To presumably return home to a cold dinner?”

    Manager: “Well… err…”

    Me: “Or are you suggesting that I eat my dinner, and dessert, then drive clear across town to have another piece of chicken? Are you not even going to apologise?! Or offer me a free meal or something next time?”

    Manager: “You can return the piece of chicken for free.”

    (I stopped eating fast food chicken after that.)

    I’ll Have An Explanation On The Side

    , | Sydney, NSW, Australia | At The Checkout, Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (After a long day at work I decide I’m too tired to make dinner and opt for getting food from a well-known fast-food drive-thru on my way home.)

    Server: *over drive-thru speaker* “Hi, what can I get you?”

    Me: “Hi, could I get [Burger] as a small meal?”

    (The screen comes up with my order, saying ‘large meal.’)

    Me: “Oh, sorry, but I wanted a small meal, not a large.”

    (Screen changes to ‘medium meal’ and I decide that’s good enough.)

    Server: “What sides do you want?”

    Me: “Um… fries?”

    Server: “Which two sides do you want?”

    Me: “Um… well… fries and I take [Soda-pop] as the drink.”

    Server: “Yes, but which two sides do you want?”

    (I have no idea what he’s talking about and frantically start scanning the menus around me for a clue.)

    Server: “… Hello? What two sides do you want?”

    Me: “Ah, sorry, but what can I choose from?”


    Me: “Um, sorry? What options do I have?”

    Server: “What do you want for your two sides?”

    Me: “What can I choose from?”


    Server: “Please pull forward to pay.”

    (I am really confused at this point, pull forward, pay, and get my food soon after. When I open it up at home I look inside and see that I did get a mini cheeseburger and a box of popcorn chicken as sides. Only then do I vaguely remember an ad I had seen weeks ago about how you can create your own meal with your own sides. But why couldn’t that server just explain it to me?!)

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