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    Needs To Wakey Flakey

    , | USA | Bosses & Owners, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (The manager on duty is a bit flaky and we often have to remind her of things that she is supposed to be doing. One day she talks to a customer at the counter then walks away. Ten minutes later she still hasn’t returned and we start calling for her.)

    Me: “Oh, there you are! The counter has been calling you for almost 10 minutes.”

    Manager: “Well, you need to tell them to quit yelling because it’s disturbing to the customers!”

    Me: “Okay… What do you want me to tell the lady that’s still waiting for you?”

    Manager: “What lady?”

    Me: “The one on counter? You told her you would be back over 10 minutes ago.”

    Manager: “Oh, God! I completely forgot!”

    (She quickly gets the customer sorted and then turns back to us with a glare.)

    Manager: “Why didn’t anyone say anything to me?!”

    Coworker: “Why do you think we were screaming for you?”

    (We didn’t get in trouble but she was still blaming us all day.)

    Take It Back To The Sauce

    , | TAS, Australia | At The Checkout, Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I work at the local fast food place in town. We are doing a promotional, limited time burger. I am currently not working and am going through the drive-thru with my boyfriend.)

    Me: “Hi. Can I get a [promotional burger] with ketchup and mayonnaise instead of the usual sauce?”

    Cashier: “I’m sorry. We can’t put that sauce on that burger.”

    Me: “I’ve ordered the same thing several other times and never had an issue.”

    Cashier: “No, the system won’t process it.”

    Me: “Can you just put it through as sauce packets and ask the kitchen staff to put it on the burger?”

    Cashier: “No, I can’t do that either.”

    (I know we can do that at our restaurant as I get requests from managers all the time to add things to burgers that wouldn’t go through the system.)

    Me: “Can I just get the sauce packets separately then?”

    (The cashier puts it through but when we receive our order, I have not received my sauce. I take it into the store and try to get the attention of the staff but none of them are interested. Fed up, I go behind the counter, open up my burger, and add the sauce myself.)

    Me: “It looks like we can add this sauce to the burger, huh?”

    When Coworking Is Not Working

    , | OH, USA | Coworkers, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (Our manager is in a fit because a coworker who is known to try to get out of working just called in to say that he needed a ride from the hospital. Both coworkers who can get him there can’t; one just clocked on and the other can’t clock off until he is at the store. My coworker who can’t clock off is panicking and crying because she needs to go to an event right at the time she is supposed to clock off.)

    Coworker: “I am so angry! Why did [Other Coworker] not get a ride from his friend?”

    Me: “He’s just stupid.”

    Coworker: “I know, but he makes me so mad!” *starts pacing* “I want to rip out my hair!”

    Me: *walks over to drink station* “[Beverage]?”

    Coworker: “I just— What?”

    Me: “Do you drink [Beverage]?”

    Coworker: “Yes.”

    Me: *fills up a kids cup with [Beverage] and hands it to coworker* “There, there, now, [Coworker]. Drink. Don’t pull your hair out. Drink and imagine pulling [Other Coworker]‘s hair out.”

    Coworker: *drinks slowly*

    Me: “Better?”

    Coworker: *throws cup away* “Much. Although, I’m scared now about how you knew that would work.”

    Me: “I’ve worked here six months longer than you. That’s six more months of [Other Coworker] than you…”

    Weak-Minded Customers

    , | Oakville, ON, Canada | Coworkers, Geeks Rule

    (We are at that point in the day where we’d prefer not to get customers, because we’re tired and don’t want to be interrupted while we do our pre-closing tasks. The manager on duty tells us something funny that had just happened.)

    Manager: “There was a customer coming up to the door, and I just focused really hard and thought, ‘GET OUT. GET OUT. GET OUT,’ and he turned around and left!”

    (We all start laughing.)

    Me: “You telepathically made him leave!”

    Manager: “Yeah! It was like a Jedi mind trick!”

    Me: “‘This is not the [Restaurant] you’re looking for!’”

    Totally Off Your Nut

    , | NE, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I have a coworker with a very bad nut allergy; bad enough that he carries an EpiPen with him in his car. I walk in on him having this conversation with the other cooks one day.)

    Coworker: “I almost died the other day. I ate an Almond Joy because I didn’t know there was coconut in it and had to go to the hospital.”

    Manager: “Aren’t you deathly allergic to almonds, too?”

    Coworker: “Yeah. Why… OH!  Wow, that was stupid of me.”

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