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  • Not So Closely Guarded
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  • Belongs In The Car Fool Lane

    | USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (My work is only a 10-minute walk from home. On the walk to work I pass a gas station with a small convenience section. I call in one day on the way into work to pick up some milk and a breakfast snack. I go to the counter to pay.)

    Me: ”Just this, please.”

    Cashier #1: ”What pump?”

    Me: ”I haven’t pumped gas; I just want to buy the milk and snack.”

    Cashier #1: ”Lady, I’m not an idiot, and I WILL call the Police if you leave without paying for what you pumped!”

    Me: ”I WALKED HERE! Look outside, there are NO cars parked in the forecourt!”

    Cashier #1: ”Well, you probably pumped and drove off round the corner when I was on the phone!”

    Me: ”Are you crazy?! Check the CCTV, or check your system; it will show I have not pulled up in a car, or pumped anything.”

    (By this time, the shouting has drawn the attention of another cashier, thankfully who I had seen plenty of times before and who I knew well enough to exchange pleasantries with.)

    Cashier #2: ”[Cashier #1], what are you doing?”

    Cashier #1: ”This THIEF is trying to scam us out of paying her fuel!”

    Cashier #2: ”No, she works in the building next door. She comes in all the time; if you paid attention you’d know that.”

    (She then rang me up for my items and I walked out the door, through the forecourt and round the corner to my office. As I rounded the corner, I looked back to see Cashier #1 still watching me as I walked to make sure I don’t have a secret car hidden round ‘the corner.’ At least it woke me up for the day!)

    Not Faking Their Hatred For The Job

    | VA, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’m looking around in a gas station when a clearly underage teenager tries to buy beer.)

    Cashier: “ID, please.”

    Teen: “Here you go.” *handing over an ID*

    (The cashier looks at it for a second before throwing it down on the counter.)

    Cashier: “Hey, man, this s***’s fake!”

    (The teen turns white as a sheet.)

    Teen: “Wh… what?”

    Cashier: “You heard me! This s*** is fake! But I don’t give a f***. I hate my job.” *rings up the beer and hands the change over to the teenager* “Have a nice day, kid!”

    The Number Must Have Popsicled Into Their Head

    , | New Zealand | Coworkers, Employees, Extra Stupid

    (I am eight at the time. I go to the gas station retailer to buy two popsicles, which cost 99c each. I have a “buy one get one free” card for the popsicles, but when I buy two I am charged $1.98. I thought there was an increase in price so I just leave, but I mention it to my dad in the car.  My dad tells me off and makes me go back in to the cashier with the receipt.)

    Me: “Um. Excuse me, how much is this popsicle?”

    Cashier #1: “99c.”

    Me: *startled* “Then why did I get charged $1.98?”

    Cashier #1: “Because you bought two.”

    Me: “But I have a ‘get one free’ card!”

    Cashier #1: “Okay, I’ll try again.” *points to popsicle #1* “This popsicle is 99c.”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Cashier #1: “And you get this one:” *points to popsicle 2* “…for free.”

    Me: “Yes…?”

    Cashier #1: “So the price is $1.98.”

    Me: “Huh?”

    (Cashier #2, beside Cashier #1, overhears the entire conversation and interjects.)

    Cashier #2: “Here, son, I’ll fix it for you…”

    (Cashier #1 remained confused after I left the store with my change.)

    Pressing For Cash When Pressed For Cash

    | Henderson, NV, USA | Bosses & Owners, Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful, Money

    (My husband and I stop by a gas station to fill up after picking up my daughter from her grandma’s. I’ve had my card number stolen from this location before, so I decided that I was going to go ahead and pre-pay inside while my husband waited by the pump.)

    Clerk: “What’s up?”

    Me: “I just need $30 on pump three, please.”

    Clerk: “Okay, hold on.” *hits buttons on screen* “Cash or card?”

    Me: “Card, please.” *I pull out my card, ready to swipe*

    Clerk: “Oh, s***. Yeah, I pushed cash. It’s already gone through. Hold on, let me get my manager.”

    (He turns to the side and the manager is just on the register next to him.)

    Clerk: “Yeah, um, I hit cash, but it was supposed to be card.”

    Manager: “All right, I’ll fix it.” *pushes buttons on screen* “Hey! $4.05 has already been pumped!”

    Me: “What? Oh! My husband must have already started pumping.”

    Manager: “You have to pay cash now.”

    Me: “I don’t have cash because I was planning on using my card. It wasn’t—”

    Manager: “You pay cash now!”

    Me: “I don’t HAVE cash! I need to use my card! Your clerk is the one who let it go through as cash!”

    Manager: “What about your husband? Does he have cash? You need to pay in cash, now!”

    Me: “No, my husband doesn’t have any cash. That’s why I was going to use my card! You really can’t do anything about this?”

    Manager: “Fine, you do cash back!”

    Me: “Well, do you have an ATM?”

    Manager: “No, you can do cash back at the register.”

    (He sets up the register to do a cash back charge of $4.05, but he adds a $0.25 charge to the total. I assume it’s a fee for doing cash-back only. He tells me to swipe my card for the cash back and I do so.)

    Manager: “Okay. Now, how much do you want?”

    Me: “Well, I guess $25. Pump three.”

    Manager: “Okay, go ahead and swipe card.”

    (I swipe my card and it goes through just fine, then he hands me my receipt.)

    Manager: “Next time have cash!”

    (I take a look at my receipt and it shows the $0.25 charge as a ‘grocery item.’)

    Me: “Wait, what’s with this 25-cent charge?”

    Manager: “That’s the stupid fee, for messing up our register. Now move; I need to get the next customer.”

    Me: “Excuse me? I don’t think so! This all started because your employee hit the wrong button! 25 cents may not be much, but I can’t afford to waste even a penny. Give me my 25 cents back!”

    Manager: “Fine.” *tosses a quarter at me* “Now get out!”

    (I took my change and receipt and left. I hate that gas station. Too bad it’s the only one in the area.)

    How To Win The War Against Telemarketers, Part 5

    | Madison, WI, USA | Coworkers, Employees, Liars/Scammers, New Hires

    (I’m the general manager at a gas station. We’ve always had problems with scammers trying to activate gift cards over the phone, but lately they’ve gotten a lot more annoying. I’m working with a new hire when I answer the phone. We’re both fluent in sign language.)

    Me: “Hello, this is [Store]. How can I help you today?”

    Caller: “Hi, I’m from [Company] customer support. We’ve received an automatic error report from your location, and I’m calling to confirm. Did you recently have trouble activating a gift card?”

    Me: *signs* “It’s a scammer.” *out loud* “No, not that I’ve been aware of.”

    Caller: “Hmm, that’s odd. Can you please ring up a gift card and check the activation code?”

    New Hire: *signs* “Can I mess with him? Pretty please?”

    Me: *signs* “Sure.” *out loud* “Here, let me get my manager.” *passes the phone*

    New Hire: “‘Dirty Dan’s House of Hookers,’ you got the dough and we got the blow! How can I help you today?

    Caller: *hangs up*

    (He’s a keeper!)

    How To Win The War Against Telemarketers, Part 4
    How To Win The War Against Telemarketers, Part 3
    How To Win The War Against Telemarketers, Part 2
    From Not Always Related:
    How To Win The War Against Telemarketers

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