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  • Under The Table Remarks

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Employees, Rude & Risque

    (My fiancé and I are checking into a room. While we share a bed, we are abstinent for personal reasons, and generally do not share those reasons with anyone else.)

    Me: “Hi. Do you have any rooms available tonight?”

    Clerk: “All we have left is [Suite]. Is that okay?”

    Me: “Yes, that’s fine. We’ll take that.”

    Clerk: “Cool. Are you guys married? What are you in town for?”

    Fiancé: “Not married, but was looking for a tux.”

    Clerk: “Oh really? Are you okay with just the one bed?”

    Me: *getting uncomfortable* “Yes, we’re fine with that.”

    Clerk: “Okay, that’s cool. When’s the wedding?”

    Me: “It’s [date].”

    Clerk: “Oh awesome! Coming up. So, am I invited?”

    Me: “Ummm…”

    Clerk: “Oh, just kidding. Just kidding. So, you’re in room 108, and just so you know, the coffee table totally holds up if you want to have extra fun.”

    Me: “EXCUSE ME?!”

    Clerk: “Oh, not like that? Totally cool. Enjoy your stay!”

    Me: *to fiancé* “Did he actually say all that to me?”

    (The weirdest thing is, the clerk never seemed to get how uncomfortable he made us!)

    Finally Tipped Off

    , | BC, Canada | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Employees, Food & Drink, Money

    (I am 21 years old and slightly scruffy looking, but hold a prominent position in an ultrasonic based oil and gas service company in northern British Columbia. I take a vacation down south for a family get together. I go out for breakfast.)

    Me: “Hello. I am looking for the restaurant. Can you help me?”

    Security Guard: “Sir, if you want to go into the casino, I need to see some ID.”

    Me: “That is fine; I was unaware that the restaurant was in there.”

    Security Guard: “It’s not. There is a concession there that sells chips but I need to see your ID first.”

    Me: “Look I just want to sit down at a nice place and have a nice meal. If you insist here is my ID.”

    Security Guard: “Okay, sir, the concession is up the stairs and to the left.”

    (I go up to the concession and ask the woman if she could help me. She promptly points me in the right direction. I head down to the restaurant and get a table where I am placed in the farthest back corner with no view.)

    Waitress: “Yeah, what can I get you?”

    Me: “I will have the candied salmon eggs benedict with a glass of orange juice, please.”

    Waitress: “Are you sure? That is quite expensive.”

    Me: “I can afford it, I assure you.”

    Waitress: “Okay, I’m ‘sure’ you can.”

    (I receive my food and it is quite good, but I flag down the waitress to get a refill.)

    Me: “Hello. Can I get another orange juice, please?”

    Waitress: “You know you have to pay for that, right? They are not free refills. This isn’t a cheap restaurant.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I understand that you probably have a lot of people come in that try to dine and dash. I understand that I am not dressed according to my economic status. However, my mother raised me alone on a waitress’ salary and I have always been a believer in very good tips for good service. You have treated me like scum since I walked in here. People are never who you think them to be and I am quite insulted by this. Do you see that brand new fully loaded 2012 Chevy pick up?” *uses key fob* “That’s mine. I am an honest hard working person who is on vacation. But you know what, since you’re so concerned with my money, don’t worry. Now that you’re not getting a tip the bill will be a lot easier on this poor soul.”

    (The waitress’ face turned bright red and she couldn’t even look at me.)

    My Sympathies For Your Management

    | USA | Bosses & Owners, Crazy Requests

    (I have just finished talking to a guy who is very upset that we we’re sold out. A few days later after that, my manager and I have a chat.)

    Manager: “You know, I got a complaint a few days ago from a guy that was upset about one of our workers not helping him find a room.”

    Me: “Oh, I think I spoke to him! He got really rude when I told him we had no more rooms. He demanded that I find him one.”

    Manager: “Yeah, I thought it was you. He complained that you were very unhelpful.”

    Me: “But he didn’t even stay here! How could he complain?”

    Manager: “Well, he can. And he did.”

    Me: “…”

    Manager: “Just ‘act’ more sympathetic on the phone, okay?” *leaves*

    How To Freely Encourage Your Dislike

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Overtime

    (Our hotel has been open for almost a year when we find out that we will be having internal auditors come in and check over our work to make sure that everything is being done the way they want. The problem is that we have just found out what they require as far as how things like reports should be put together. A few of us who really like our general manager get together to redo almost a year’s worth of work in the next three weeks. My coworkers and I over hear this exchange between our general manager and the assistant general manager.)

    General Manager: “You know, those desk clerks have worked miracles getting all these reports and packets together. We should do something nice for them. They have even stayed after hours and off the clock a lot of nights to get this done.”

    Assistant General Manager: “Why? They are the ones dumb enough to work for free.”

    (It’s a good thing we love our general manager. We now don’t even bother to pretend to like the assistant general manager.)

    There Is Such Thing As A Free Meal

    | NY, USA | Awesome Workers, Employees, Money, Top, Tourists & Travel

    (I have an awful flight with multiple stop-overs, also requiring me to spend the night at an airport hotel, which I’ve pre-paid. Since I live in Canada I don’t have US dollars on me, while I also forget my credit card. I arrive at the hotel tired and extremely hungry since my last meal was over 24 hours ago and the airplane didn’t serve food.)

    Concierge: “Good evening. How are you?”

    Me: “I’m fine, thanks. You don’t happen to take Canadian dollars for room service, do you?”

    Concierge: “I’m sorry, but we don’t. You also won’t be able to change your money because it’s too late in the evening. Are you hungry?”

    Me: “Actually, I’m starving but I suppose I’ll have to tough it out.”

    Concierge: “Have you eaten today?”

    Me: “I haven’t, but I’ll just get something tomorrow morning.”

    Concierge: “No, that won’t do! Would you like my dinner? It’s only a microwave meal but better than nothing!”

    Me: “No, no, that’s fine! I can’t eat your dinner. You’re working!”

    Concierge: “My shift is almost over. Seriously, you can have it! It’s not a problem!”

    Me: “Well, if you’re sure about this I’d be very glad to accept your offer.”

    Concierge: “Absolutely! I’ll just get you checked in first and then I’ll see about that dinner.”

    (The concierge then proceeded to warm up her dinner in the staff microwave and even gave me her soda and an apple! It was one of the nicest things a stranger has ever done for me. I left a thank-you note with the day concierge when I left the next morning and I hope she knew how much I appreciated her kindness.)


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