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    Driven By Assumptions

    , | UK | Bad Behavior, Transportation

    (I’m 25 and have been working for several years. I’ve only just learned to drive and passed the test. I decide to go with a lease car suggested by my dad’s friend, since it actually works out cheaper as a long-term investment. I’m calling the car company’s insurance line.)

    Me: “Hi, I’m calling to activate my seven-days free insurance for my new car?”

    Agent: “Okay, I just need your personal details and the details of your car.”

    (I give her them, including my date of birth and the manufacture year of the car.)

    Agent: “Ooh, that’s a new model! Somebody’s being spoilt!”

    Me: “What do you mean?”

    Agent: “You’re getting [Car] as your first car? There’s no way a teenager could afford that. Mummy and daddy must love you! Lucky for some!”

    Me: “Actually, I’m paying for this out of my own pocket. If you’ll notice my age, I’ve held off on learning to drive and buying a car until I could afford to pay for it all – and run it – myself.”

    Agent: “Oh. Well… how was I supposed to know?”

    Me: “Maybe in the future, don’t make assumptions about people!”

    Doing A Bad Job (Description)

    | Surrey, England, UK | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Job Seekers

    (My husband applies for a job and makes it to the final two candidates, to be told the other applicant got the job but that it was a difficult decision, with a ‘cigarette paper’ between the two. Encouraged, he applies for a different job with the same company a few months later.)

    Husband: *to Receptionist* “I’m here for my interview with [Interviewer].”

    Receptionist: “I’ll let her know you’re here.”

    (Several minutes later, well past the interview start time, the interviewer arrives.)

    Interviewer: “I’m sorry Mr. [Husband] you’ve wasted your time applying. We told you last time you were unsuccessful.”

    Husband: “That was for a different job. This job is—”

    Interviewer: “It’s the same job. It’s just a different title.”

    Husband: “I beg to differ. Here is the job description. It’s completely different to the job I applied for a few months ago and it has a different title. I’ve just driven for 45 minutes and you’re not ready for the interview which was scheduled by your HR department?”

    Interviewer: “It’s the same job. You really should confirm details like this before you set out for an interview.”

    Husband: “So, if your HR department advertises a different job with a different title and job description, I should assume it’s the one you said I NEARLY GOT several months ago and not apply? After my last interview, which was with you, yourself, you said you were happy to consider me for any other suitable positions.”

    Interviewer: “Um. I’m sorry you’ve wasted your time.”

    Husband: “I’m sorry, you’ve wasted my time, inviting me for an interview for a job which was advertised by your HR department but which apparently doesn’t exist!”

    Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 4

    , | Aptos, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Employees, Health & Body

    (It is the fall of 2006 and I receive a telemarketing call.)

    Agent: “I’m calling to inform you that you qualify for a $15,000.00 life insurance policy with…”

    Me: “I’m a full time student being supported by my parents. Life insurance is worthless to me. I’m already worth more dead than I am alive.”

    Agent: “But, sir! It’s free until June of 2007!”

    Me: “Well, I plan to be alive in June of 2007, Mr. Optimist!”

    Agent: “I know we all want to hope for the best, but…”

    Me: *hangs up*

    Related:
    Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 3
    Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 2
    Death Of A Sales Pitch

    This Scam Has Been Going Around

    | PA, USA | Coworkers, Criminal/Illegal, Employees

    (I work at an insurance agency for the summer doing random tasks around the office. The office is in a converted house, with a few desks in each room and large open doorways in between to talk to each other. There is also an upstairs that is technically another business but employs the same people. I start answering phones because everyone else is busy.)

    Me: “[Insurance Agency], how may I help you?”

    Caller: “Hi! I’m calling from your copier supply company. We just need to update our records. Can I please have the model number of your copier?”

    Me: “Um, sure. Hang on a second.”

    (I place the call on hold and tell one of the ladies next to me what’s going on. She laughs and tells me it’s a scam and I should just hang up, which I do. A few days later…)

    Me: “[Insurance Agency], how may I help you?”

    Caller: “Hi! I’m calling from your copier supply company. We just need to update our records. Could you tell me the model number of your copier?”

    Me: “I’m sorry; I’m not the person you want to speak with. Please hold, I’ll transfer you.”

    (I transferred the call to the desk next to me. After speaking to the caller, my coworker put the caller on hold and transferred him. We managed to transfer him to six different people, including people upstairs, before he hung up. It became our favorite game. Our record was 10 transfers, including back to the original person who had answered.)

    Unsure How To Insure, Part 5

    | TX, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid

    (We left our insurance company for one month and are now going back to them with a slightly different policy. The insurance company needs proof of prior coverage from our previous insurer, which is them. But they can’t just get this from their records.)

    Me: “Let me see if I have this straight. You want me to call my previous insurer – which is you – and request that you fax me proof of my prior coverage… with you. I will then send that proof of prior coverage back to you to prove to you that we did in fact have coverage with you, 30 days ago.”

    Insurance Agent: “Yes, if you wouldn’t mind.”

    Me: “Mind? It’s awesome. I’ll be telling this story for years!”

    Related:
    Unsure How To Insure, Part 4
    Unsure How To Insure, Part 3
    Unsure How To Insure, Part 2


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