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    Can’t Quite Picture Your Request

    | Newbury, MA, USA | Food & Drink, Language & Words

    Me: “Can I get a pitcher of sangria?”

    Employee: *confused* “I’m sorry; I don’t think… Yeah, we don’t do that.”

    Me: *more confused* “Okay, thanks. I’ll find something else.”

    (I go back to looking at the menu, which clearly lists pitchers of sangria. Two minutes later…)

    Employee: “Wait, did you mean like drink pitchers? I thought you meant like a picture! Like you wanted to know what it looked like or something! I was so confused! Yeah… We do drink pitchers. I’ll get you one. I’m sorry, I was so confused!”

    Me: “…It’s that kind of day, isn’t it?”

    (The sangria was lovely, and I couldn’t blame her! It was Friday afternoon by the beach; she was ready to be done! Still, though… Who asks for a PICTURE of a drink?)

    Close(d) To Death

    | Newport, KY, USA | Bosses & Owners, Overtime

    (I went into work despite having a cold. By the time I’m leaving, I’m feeling my fever come back and my manager gives me some cold medicine.)

    Manager: “[My Name], do you work tomorrow?”

    Me: “Yeah, I close.”

    Manager: “Will you be alive?”

    Me: “I hope so. But, if I die, I’ll call and let you know.”

    Lightly Busted

    | Manhattan, NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (It’s the middle of the day on a hot, July Saturday and my friend and I decide to get some ice cream from a popular local chain. The nearest store to us is completely dark and empty when we get there.)

    Me: “What? Why is it closed?”

    Friend: *peers through the window* “There are three people just sitting behind the counter! You don’t think…”

    (He pushes on the door which opens and the employees slowly stand up.)

    Me: “Are you open?”

    Employee #1: *sullenly* “Yes.”

    (He turns on the lights. Almost instantly the place is flooded with customers.)

    Friend: “Oh, you guys are so busted!”

    (We never did find out what happened to them but I can’t imagine they kept that job very long.)

    Their Service Skills Don’t Cut (Out) The Mustard

    , | Denver, CO, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (It’s been a long day, and I just want some quick dinner so I pull into the drive-thru.)

    Me: “Can I get a pretzel burger with no mustard, please?”

    Worker: “That doesn’t come with mustard. It comes with lettuce, tomato, onion and honey mustard.”

    Me: *facepalm* “No honey mustard then, please.”

    (Sure enough, when I get home and take a bite out of my burger, it still has honey mustard on it.)

    Not Even Worth Screaming For The Ice Cream

    | Plant City, FL, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I go to our local donut/ice cream combo shop for ice cream. The place isn’t busy; there’s only me, an older couple, and a couple of young women. There is also at least three ladies working. The young women put in a big order for several quarts of ice cream, and the girl behind the counter goes to work.)

    Employee: *one to older couple* “I’ll be with you shortly.”

    (This has been after several minutes of gathering stuff. Meanwhile another girl has finished an order at the window, and another girl is doing minor stuff. Meanwhile, the older couple; who is just there to buy some bags of coffee. and I are still waiting. Several more minutes pass.)

    Me: *deciding to strike up idle chatter with older couple* “Really like their coffee, huh?”

    Older Woman: “I just have a gift card. I usually don’t buy it.”

    (After several more minutes the older woman mutters frustrated words to her husband and me.)

    Me: “Yeah, I’m debating going to one of the other ice cream places.”

    (The older couple agree, and we go back to waiting. Finally after ten minutes or so the girl with the huge order finally asks one of the other workers to take care of us, to which the girl says she’ll get to us shortly. At this point we’re fed up waiting after another couple minutes pass.)

    Older Woman: “All right, we’re walking out.”

    (She starts leaving with husband.)

    Me: *following them* “Me, too.”

    (The employees didn’t even try calling or coming after us to stop us from leaving.)

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