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    Freudian Slipped On The Table

    | ON, Canada | Employees, Rude & Risque

    (I am the employee in this story. Our restaurant had just recently switched from a stationary credit/debit machine to a portable machine that you can bring right to the table. I had just finished serving a table of police officers and they are ready to pay.)

    Officer: “Is there a cash I need to go to, to pay?”

    Me: “Nope. I can do anything you want right at the table.”

    (Immediately I can feel my face flush red as I realize what I’ve said.)

    Officer: *laughing* “Do you maybe want to rephrase that?”

    The Waiter Is A Halfwit

    | Schaumburg, IL, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

     

    (My husband and I go to a popular restaurant that makes great shakes in different flavors including half one flavor, half another.)

    Me: *to waiter after looking at the shake flavors* “Is it possible to get 1/2 banana and 1/2 chocolate?”

    Waiter: *pauses, then looks thoughtful* “Well, we have a 1/2 chocolate and 1/2 banana. Will that do?”

    Me: “…”

    Needs A Change Of Job

    , | Clearwater, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Math & Science, Money

    (I go through the drive-thru for a burrito and my total cost is $1.06.I hand the cashier $10.10. After about 30 seconds of staring at the money in the drawer…)

    Cashier: “How much did you give me?”

    Me: “Ten dollars and ten cents.”

    (She hands me back $9.)

    Cashier: “Is that right?”

    Me: “Close enough.”

    Trying Not To Promote Favoritism

    , | MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Employees

    (I don’t have a car but I live within walking distance of my job, so it’s not an issue. One day it’s raining pretty hard and one of my managers calls to ask if I’d like a ride to work.)

    Me: “Thank you so much for the lift. It’s pouring out there.”

    Manager #1: “Yeah, I couldn’t in good conscious let you walk in this, even for ten minutes. It’s actually flooded in some areas. One of the bridges in my neighborhood is out.”

    (We walk into work together.)

    Manager #1: “So you get off at what, six? If you want I can drop you off too, but I get off at six thirty—”

    Manager #2: “You’re not supposed to show favoritism to employees!”

    Manager #1: “Uh, how is making sure she gets to work safely showing favoritism? It’s flooding and there are lightning strikes. If I hadn’t picked her up I would have told her to stay home.”

    Manager #2: “I’ll tell the boss! You know she’s up for a promotion and now you’re showing favoritism!”

    Me: “… I’m up for a promotion?”

    (Apparently I wasn’t supposed to know that, but the district manager had no issue with me getting a ride to and from work from a manager – she was just glad I’d shown up for my shift because a lot of people called out that day due to the flooding!)

    A Heated Working Environment

    | South Africa | Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (I am working a busy dinner shift at a steak restaurant. Normally steaks are sold without sauce, and we are encouraged by management to try and sell sauces with steak, obviously increasing the amount diners are spending. I am serving several tables at once, and starting to spin a little. My manager has been breathing down my neck all night about selling sauces. I finally manage to convince two diners to buy a sauce each. After serving the steaks to the couple, I leave their table, momentarily forgetting about the sauces. I am at the grill calling on steaks for another table, when the manager comes pounding towards me.)

    Manager: *in a lowered, but angry voice* “Where the h*** are table 30′s sauces?!”

    Me: “I’m sorry. I forgot for a moment. I will get them immediately.”

    (The sauces are kept in a bain-marie, and are extremely hot. In my rush to pour sauces into small ramekins, using a large metal ladle, I accidentally spill some of the boiling hot sauces on my hand. I’m in shock, and drop the ramekin, spilling sauce on myself and the general working area. The manager, standing on the opposite side of the counter, can see something is wrong, and rushes over.)

    Me: *thinking he is coming to help me* “It’s okay. I’m okay. I’ll just put my hand under some cold water.” *my hand is red and hurting*

    Manager: *glaring at me* “No! It is not okay! Your table is still waiting for their sauces!”

    (He pushes me out of the way, pours the sauces, and slams the ladle down.)

    Me: *stunned silence*

    Manager: *plucking cleaning rag from the pocket of my apron* “Clean this mess up, and get those steaks out you just called on!” *rushes off with sauces, smiling sweetly at customers*


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