Category: Extra Stupid

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Directionless Direction

| OK, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I live on corner on a main road. The cross street is clearly numbered (like 143rd street). The cross street doesn’t continue so it is T with 2 corners. I live on one corner and the other corner is a 40-acre field, and the opposite of both corners is just woods. After ordering food, my instructions to the driver included the cross street and house number and I say “it’s the only house at the intersection.”)

Driver: “Hey, I’ve been driving around and I can’t find your house.”

Me: “Where are you?”

Driver: “At the corner of [X] and [Y].”

Me: “What do the directions say?”

Driver: “That it’s the only house at the corner of [X] and [Y].”

Me: “Do you see a house?”

Driver: “Yes.”

Me: “Is it the only house at the intersection?”

Driver: “Yes.”

Me: “Any reason you can’t deliver it to me there?”

Driver: “Well, I guess not.”

(It would have been bad enough if it happened once, but it happened a lot. I eventually refined the instructions to indicate which street the house faced, but even that didn’t help.)

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Tech Unsupportive, Part 2

| Chicago, IL, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

(My boyfriend’s Internet is acting up. After getting the customer care support number online, he finds it’s not working. So he gets a rep in chat.)

Boyfriend: “So the Internet is acting wonky. Could you check the line?”

IT Representative: “Sure, but first, why don’t you cycle our router.”

Boyfriend: “If I cycle your router, I’ll completely disconnect and lose this chat.”

IT Representative: “No, you’ll be fine. Go cycle the router, please.”

Boyfriend: “Okay, if you say so.”

(He lost the chat.)

Related:
Tech Unsupportive

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Spared It Less Than Half A Thought

| Shawnee, KS, USA | Extra Stupid

(A man comes up to the counter and asks for some ham. I put some up on the scale.)

Customer: “Is that more than half a pound?”

Me: “It’s 0.65, sir.”

Customer: “That doesn’t tell me anything! Is it more or less than half a pound?!”

Me: “…”

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With Great Bacon, Comes Great Stupidity, Part 2

| Germany | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I have a free period and decide to sneak in a early lunch at a well-known fast food place. I don’t usually do this because I’m vegetarian and their veggie food just tastes somewhat stale. However, I order a Veggie Burger and start eating only to notice something unusual. I take the burger apart only to notice lots of bacon on it. I head back to the till.)

Me: “Sorry to bother you. Is it possible that there’s BACON on my VEGGIE burger?”

Employee: “Wha… Oh… Yes. So sorry! I’ll get the manager.”

(She heads to the back. The place is rather empty so while waiting for the manager I can eavesdrop on the conversation between the employee and (what seems to be) the “cook.”)

Employee: “Did you put bacon on a veggie burger?!”

Cook: “Yes… Why?”

Employee: “There’s supposed to be no meat on a VEGGIE burger.”

Cook: “Well, there was no meat on it. Only bacon.”

Employee: “Bacon IS meat!”

Cook: “But… but… it just tastes better with bacon!”

Related:
With Great Bacon, Comes Great Stupidity

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Not The Sharpest Arrow

| Phoenix, AZ, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Technology

(I am covering the help desk for the usual guy that is out sick.)

Me: “Thank you for calling the help desk. How can I help you?”

Self-Important Coworker: “My computer has broken and I can’t work! This is the third time I’ve had to call in this week! Does anyone there know to actually fix anything!?”

Me: “Well, I’m sorry you’re having difficulties. If you can explain the issue you’re experiencing I can try to resolve it for you.”

Self-Important Coworker: “My mouse isn’t working! I’ve been working on this spreadsheet for four hours and it’s due by the end of the day! Now the mouse is stuck on the right side of the screen and I can’t get it to go back! If I’m late with this I’m going to tell my manager it’s your fault!”

(I get her information and remotely access her system.)

Me: “Okay. Can you show me where the problem is?”

(She clicks on the spreadsheet in the taskbar, so obviously the mouse is working.)

Self-Important Coworker: “Right here! Look! It’s on column 45! When I hit enter is just goes down!”

(Without thinking about it, I hold down the left-arrow key and scroll back to column one. Before I have a chance to say anything she chimes back in.)

Self-Important Coworker: “Whoa, whoa, whoa! How did you do that?!”

Me: “Uh, I just hit the left arrow key on the keyboard.”

Self-Important Coworker: “Oh.”

Me: “You can also scroll with the arrows.” *demonstrate by clicking on the scroll bar* “Does that solve your issue?”

Self-Important Coworker: “Um, yeah. Thanks.”

Me: *face-palm* “Thank you for calling.”

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