Category: Extra Stupid

Going Through A Very Dry Period

| Washington, PA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Health & Body

(I had a full removal of my uterus at 34 due to medical issues. A few YEARS later, for another completely unrelated procedure, I’m being checked in by a nurse, going through usual bevy of questions.)

Nurse: “Okay, and is there any way you could be pregnant now?”

Me: “No, I had a hysterectomy in 2005.”

Nurse: “And when was your last period?”

Me: *flabbergasted* “About a month prior to that.”

Fails To Register

| DE, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Money

(I work at a women’s retail clothing store. My fellow assistant manager is not the brightest bulb, and conversations like this one happen frequently. I call the store back after leaving my shift to give fellow manager a heads up…)

Me: “Hi, [Assistant Manager], I wanted to let you know I forgot to split the change order between the two registers when I came back from the bank run. Could you buy some of the $1s from Register #1 into Register #2, please?”

Assistant Manager: “Sure thing. I did notice that Register #2 is low on $1s. You want me to just take them from Register #1?”

(The next day:)

Assistant Manager: “Hey, something was off with the registers last night when I closed. Register #1 was short, but Register #2 was over the same amount! I counted them both down and just took the over amount from Register #1 and put it into Register #2. Then they both finally came out okay! How do you think that happened?”

Me: “When I asked you to buy some $1s from Register #1 to put into Register #2, did you buy them or just take the $1s from Register #1 and put them in Register #2?”

Assistant Manager: “Oh, I took some $1s from R1 and put them in R2….WOW, that’s the same amount as the shortage from last night! Think that has anything to do with it?”

(Oh, and this person’s previous occupation? A bank manager, for almost 20 years.)

Taxing Faxing, Part 15

| Montreal, QC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I am in charge of supervising money transfer between Bank’s partners and clients. We received a request to kickback an erroneous wire our client received a few months ago, and the order took an unusual amount of time to process due to lack of information. Eventually, the colleague in charge of processing wires confirmed she executed the transaction.)

Colleague: “It’s all done, [My Name]! I sent the fax for the transactions.”

Me: “A fax? Isn’t this done usually by emails?”

Colleague: “Yes, but our protocol requests that we proceed to these transfer through faxes.”

Me: “I see… The order has already been delayed for a while. How long do you think this will take to be processed?”

Colleague: “Probably one or two days.”

(Three days pass and we still do not see any evidence of money transfer going out. Our client is eager to have this payable out of its book and ask if we could just cancel the fax transaction and issue a regular wire instead of the whole kickback procedure.)

Me: “[Colleague], please call [Counterparty] and cancel the wire you issued earlier this week. [Client] wants to make a regular wire quicker by email. I’ll be in a meeting for the next hour, but do confirm me when you have cancelled the transaction so we can proceed as quickly as possible.”

(Later, I received the following email from my colleague:)

Colleague: “All right! I sent the fax to cancel the wire!”

(I literally had to bang my head on the desk for the next minute.)

Related:
Taxing Faxing, Part 14
Taxing Faxing, Part 13
Taxing Faxing, Part 12

Talking Out Of Their Asthma

| USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Health & Body

(It is just after daylight savings and the clock in our work room has not been changed yet. My coworker decides to take matters into her own hands and stacks up boxes to be able to reach it. She then makes a face about how dusty it is.)

Coworker: “Oh my! I’m gonna have an asthma attack. I don’t have asthma but I’m gonna catch it from this!”

(This coming from someone who works in a pharmacy and knows how this stuff works!)

His Brain Has A Busy Signal

| Marietta, GA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid

(My car is in the shop and for a week now, I’ve been trying to get somebody on the phone. Today, I get through.)

Employee: “Hello, [Car Place].”

Me: “Hi, this is [My Name]. I’m calling about the Taurus.”

Employee: “Yeah, it’s been sitting there. We can’t work on it until we get an okay.”

Me: “Yeah, sorry about that. I keep trying to call back but you don’t have an answering machine and I keep getting a busy signal.”

Employee: “Are you sure you have the right number?”

Me: “I called you today with it…”

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