Category: Extra Stupid

Time For A P Break

| USA | Extra Stupid, Language & Words

(I’m trying to set up my online account for the local public transport system via phone, and it isn’t working.)

Me: “Yeah, so I entered my email and the password, and it keeps saying it’s invalid. Am I doing something wrong?”

Employee: “No, that should work, as long as you’re using the information you told me. The email is xxxhamster4, right?”

Me: “Yes, that’s it. And the password is [password].”

Employee: “I don’t know what to tell you. It just doesn’t seem to be working.”

Me: “Well, is there something else I could do? I’m going to be using this card every day; I need to be able to fill it up without going to the main store all the time.”

Employee: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this system is relatively new. It may just be a glitch.”

Me: “Just to be sure, can we maybe double-check that you have my information down right? It’s x-x-x-h-a-m-s-t-e-r-7, with the 7 as a number, not spelled out, and the email address is @[website]—“

Employee: “I think I know what’s wrong. You forgot the ‘p’.”

Me: “Sorry?”

Employee: “The ‘p’. In hamster. No wonder it hasn’t been going through.”

Me: “Um… there isn’t a ‘p’ in hamster.”

Employee: “…oh.”

(Once she corrected the spelling on her end, the account worked perfectly.)

Muffin Flop, Part 2

| Baltimore, MD, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I am standing in the break room, warming up a couple of muffins for breakfast. A coworker comes in.)

Coworker: “I don’t know how you do it. You get up every morning and bake two muffins for yourself. That seems like so much trouble.”

Me: *thinking this is some kind of joke* “Uh… what?”

Coworker: “You bake two muffins every morning! That’s a lot of trouble!”

Me: *realizing she’s sincere* “I bake a batch over the weekend and just keep them in the refrigerator.”

(A look of amazement comes over my coworker’s face.)

Coworker: “YOU CAN DO THAT?! I thought you had to eat them all right away so they don’t go bad!”

Me: *still not entirely convinced this isn’t a joke* “Uh, it’s just basic. They’re not that perishable. Really, are you serious?”

Coworker: “Yeah! I didn’t know that!”

Me: *bewildered, a bit horrified, I take my muffins out* “Well, I got a bunch of stuff to do…”

(I scampered back to my desk, and later heard her talking to someone else about how she didn’t know you could keep muffins. Apparently she rarely kept ANY leftovers, somehow thinking that food goes bad in minutes. And a few months later we repeated the scene; she entirely forgot the conversation.)

Directionless Direction

| OK, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I live on corner on a main road. The cross street is clearly numbered (like 143rd street). The cross street doesn’t continue so it is T with 2 corners. I live on one corner and the other corner is a 40-acre field, and the opposite of both corners is just woods. After ordering food, my instructions to the driver included the cross street and house number and I say “it’s the only house at the intersection.”)

Driver: “Hey, I’ve been driving around and I can’t find your house.”

Me: “Where are you?”

Driver: “At the corner of [X] and [Y].”

Me: “What do the directions say?”

Driver: “That it’s the only house at the corner of [X] and [Y].”

Me: “Do you see a house?”

Driver: “Yes.”

Me: “Is it the only house at the intersection?”

Driver: “Yes.”

Me: “Any reason you can’t deliver it to me there?”

Driver: “Well, I guess not.”

(It would have been bad enough if it happened once, but it happened a lot. I eventually refined the instructions to indicate which street the house faced, but even that didn’t help.)

Tech Unsupportive, Part 2

| Chicago, IL, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

(My boyfriend’s Internet is acting up. After getting the customer care support number online, he finds it’s not working. So he gets a rep in chat.)

Boyfriend: “So the Internet is acting wonky. Could you check the line?”

IT Representative: “Sure, but first, why don’t you cycle our router.”

Boyfriend: “If I cycle your router, I’ll completely disconnect and lose this chat.”

IT Representative: “No, you’ll be fine. Go cycle the router, please.”

Boyfriend: “Okay, if you say so.”

(He lost the chat.)

Tech Unsupportive

Spared It Less Than Half A Thought

| Shawnee, KS, USA | Extra Stupid

(A man comes up to the counter and asks for some ham. I put some up on the scale.)

Customer: “Is that more than half a pound?”

Me: “It’s 0.65, sir.”

Customer: “That doesn’t tell me anything! Is it more or less than half a pound?!”

Me: “…”