Category: Extra Stupid

Don’t Baby Me

, | MA, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid

(I work the night shift at an outdoor living history museum. I do patrol while Coworker sits in dispatch. This takes place at four am.)

Me: *radioing in* “Hey, [Coworker]. I found an abandoned baby stroller outside of [building].”

Coworker: “Really?! Is it empty or is there a baby in it?”

Payment Is Tiring

| Sweden | At The Checkout, Employees, Extra Stupid

(I am out just buying soda, nothing more, nothing less. The cashier scans the soda. However does not say how much I am supposed to pay, or even looks at me.)

Me: *takes the money and holds it for him, but he continues to stare at the distance* “Hey… money?”

Cashier: *glances at me, says nothing*

Me: “Do you want… payment?”

Cashier: “Uh, yeah.” *he takes the money, and then prints receipt* “Want this?”

Me: “Nah”

(He then waved me away with a gruff grunt.)

How To Break Breakfast

| London, England, UK | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(My partner and I go into a local cafe which is well known for employing a lot of young students who can be a bit ditzy. He goes to get a table whilst I go to the counter to order breakfast for both of us. After standing for about a minute trying to catch the attention of the girl who is daydreaming right in front of me she finally snaps to and takes my order.)

Me: “I’ll have a pot of tea for two, an orange juice, a tap water, [Breakfast X], and [Breakfast Y].”

Girl: “Do you want those breakfasts on separate plates?”

A Hack Of An Excuse

| Portland, OR, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

Me: “Hey, excuse me; I’m looking for a USB cable. You know, just with USB on both ends, the longest you’ve got.”

Employee: “Oh, we don’t sell those. Most retailers don’t, because they’re often used for hacking.”

Me: *looks at laptop display case* “Oooookay.”

Helpless Against His Helpfulness, Part 2

| Denver, CO, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science

(I am checking out in the self-checkout with my three teenage boys. One of them is scanning items while I put my discount code on the PIN pad. The screen freezes. I call the attendant.)

Me: “Excuse me, sir, the screen is frozen.”

(The attendant doesn’t reply or even look up from his screen. I assume he hasn’t heard me.)

Me: “Sir?”

(The attendant sighs heavily and makes his way over to my terminal.)

Attendant: “His hand is on the scale. That’s why it’s frozen.”

(My teen yanks his hand back like he’s touched a stove.)

Attendant: “See? Here is where it gave you the discount.”

Me: “It rang up three bags of bagels. I only purchased two.”

Attendant: *interrupting* “See? It rang up $2.99 and then it took off 50 cents. That little dash means subtraction.”

Me: “I see three lines marked $2.99.” *points to screen* “$2.99, $2.99, $2.99.”

Attendant: “Fine. I will void the items.” *voids two items, scans two items* “There. Now you got your discount.”

Me: “It rang up three bagels. I bought two bagels.”

Attendant: “It deleted the $2.99, but it had to add back in the 50 cents because it subtracted it up here.”

Me: “Okay. Thanks for your help.”

(I realized that I would pay $3 just to stop having to deal with his “help.”)