Category: Coworkers

Cocoa Crazy

| AK, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Health & Body

(I’m the weird one in this story. For Valentine’s Day, my girlfriend gives me chocolate-scented hand lotion, which smells almost EXACTLY like chocolate truffles and lasts for hours. I put some on before work and am still pretty excited over it, as I love chocolate.)

Me: *runs up to my coworkers* “Guys! Guys! Smell my hand!”

(My coworkers all stare blankly at me as I shove my hand towards them.)

Coworker #1: “…I feel like we’re missing some context.”

Coworker #2: “And this is a very WEIRD way to start my shift.”

When Loyalty Is Rewarded

| Menlo Park, CA, USA | Coworkers, Language & Words, Rude & Risque

(We are checking out when we hear this:)

Worker #1: *motioning to garden hose that has fallen on the floor* “What happened to this hose?”

Worker #2: *without hesitating* “It wasn’t loyal?”

Where You Have A Spit Of Opinion

| Canada | Bad Behavior, Coworkers, Family & Kids

(My coworker is a hard-working older woman with a thick European accent. She is the best worker here, and I look up to how quickly and efficiently she works everyday. She finishes serving a customer at the deli and comes to speak with me.)

Coworker: “I spit in her food.”

Me: “Sorry, did you say you spat in her food…?”

Coworker: *ranting* “Yes. Last week, I ask her if she can wait two minutes for me to finish packaging chicken. She say okay. I serve her, and she act all nice. Then, she go and yells at manager and say I was rude and terrible employee.” *she starts giggling* “So today, I spit in her food!”

Me: “[Coworker], you can’t do that! That’s against health and safety! What if she notices?”

Coworker: *frowning* “Good! She deserve it!” *happily goes to work on other things, leaving me standing in disbelief*

The First Mayonnaise

| FL, USA | Coworkers, Food & Drink

(I’m cleaning out the small cooler in our sandwich station when I come across an uncovered pan of a crusty, dark yellowish-white substance.)

Me: “What the h*** is this?”

Coworker: *looking at it* “That’s mayonnaise.”

Me: “Leftover from whose presidency, Washington’s or Jefferson’s?”

Kissing Is All Better

| Toledo, OH, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Food & Drink

(I work at a large department store famous for its cash back system bearing its company name. We are understaffed and overstressed.)

Me: “Okay, I’m going out to organize the necklaces… again.”

Coworker: “Hey, spread some of that excitement over here, why don’tcha?”

(As I work, I noticed something on the shelf above me. It is a Hershey’s Kiss. I think maybe some little kid had left it, so I take it over to the counter.)

Me: “I found a Hershey’s Kiss over there.”

Coworker: “Lucky you.”

(An hour later, I am sorting jewelry sales on the other side of the department and came across another Hershey’s Kiss. I bring this one up and show it to a fellow employee.)

Coworker #2: “Hey, I found one too, by the customer service desk.”

(A few other people notice and come over.)

Coworker #3: “I found a few as well. They were in the women’s’ department.”

Coworker #4: “That’s so weird; I found three in the shoe section, all sitting on shelves.”

(Our boss approaches us then, holding a few Hershey’s Kisses by the paper.)

Boss: “Hey, anyone care to explain the invasion of Hershey’s Kisses all over the store?”

(He never understood why we all started laughing. We deduced that a generous, sweet-hearted customer had left them anonymously around the store in places we’d see them. We never did figure out who it was, but we were finding them for almost a week. Whoever you were, Hershey person, kisses from everyone at the store! That was the cutest thing ever!)