Category: Employees

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Employing New Tactics

| Edmonton, AB, Canada | Employees, Language & Words

(I work as a courtesy clerk, and despite wearing the uniform, I am constantly asked if I worked there. I start getting creative.)

Customer: “Do you work here?”

Me: “Nope, but I’m employed here.”

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Three Times A Shouting Lady

| UT, USA | Awesome Workers, Employees

(I work for an inbound call center, taking orders for a wide variety of products advertised on TV and radio. Callers order the advertised item, and then I have several screens of up-sells and add-ons that I have to offer to them. I am required to offer every additional item unless the customer states he or she is not interested in any extras three times, which hardly ever happens, no matter how mad they sometimes become. This call is for a product with eight add-ons. After completing the order information for the main item…)

Caller: “Now, I know you have, like, a dozen other things to sell me. Thanks to problems with my phone and my credit card, this is the fourth time I’ve called and gone through this ordeal this morning. I’ve heard it all before. I’m tired, and I’m frustrated, and I’m really trying not to get angry at you because you’re just doing your job, but I need to get this thing for my daughter. Do we really have to go through all the other stuff?”

(I could hear the exhaustion in her voice and wanted to help her out, but if I didn’t offer the extras, I could face disciplinary action. Then I had an idea.)

Me: “Well, ma’am, I do have a few additional offers for products that complement [Item] very well, and I would like to tell you about them. I think there’s a problem with my headset, though, because I’m having a bit of trouble hearing you.”

Caller: “I said I’m not interested in any additional items.”

Me: “What was that?”

Caller: “I SAID I’m NOT INTERESTED in buying ANYTHING ELSE!”

Me: “One more time, please?”

Caller: “I ONLY WANT [ITEM]! Nothing else!”

Me: “Thank you. Because you have stated you only want [Item] three times, I can now skip all the additional offers. Page forward one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, and eight. There. Standard shipping or express, ma’am?”

Caller: “You heard me just fine, didn’t you?”

Me: “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.”

Caller: “Well played, young man. Very well played. Express shipping, please.”

Me: “Express shipping it is. The total that will be charged to your credit card is [Price], and your package is expected to arrive within 3-5 business days. Thank you for ordering [Item]. I hope the rest of your day is better that it has been so far.”

Caller: “I think it will be.”

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Doesn’t Know What You(tah) Are Talking About

| MD, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Geography

(I am moving cross country by myself with all of my belongings in a little pickup truck. Note that I’m female, in my early 20s, and look like I’m 14. After a long day of driving, I pull into the first hotel I see that looks like it is in my budget.)

Me: “Hi, I’d like a room for tonight?”

Worker: “Okay, I need your ID and a credit card to put you in the system.”

Me: “Sounds good.”

(I handed over my driver license and credit card. The worker stares at my ID for a moment and says:)

Worker: “Utah? Where is Utah?”

Me: “It’s a state? Further west of here?”

Worker: “I’ve never heard of Utah before.”

Me: “I promise you, it’s a state in the USA and that’s a real driver license.”

(He takes my ID and credit card to a back room where I see him talk frantically to another employee for about five minutes. I am exhausted, so I lean against the counter and wait.)

Worker: “I’m sorry; your credit card is no good. The charge won’t go through.”

Me: “What? Are you sure? Can you try running it again? I know there is more than enough money left on it for a room tonight.”

(He took my card and went back to that room for a moment.)

Worker: “I’m sorry; your card isn’t any good. You can’t stay here tonight.”

(I left the hotel and went to another place down the road. The worker at that desk knew where Utah was, saw how tired I was, heard my story, and reserved me a room. He then told me that he wouldn’t let me check in until I took a coupon from their lobby, got myself a hot meal (using the coupon), and gave me a killer discount! A few days later, after settling into my new home, I checked my bank account. The first hotel had charged me as a no call, no show and their corporate office refused to believe that I had shown up and been turned away. It took a lot of arguing to get them to refund me the money for that night.)

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Here We Pokémon Go Again, Part 7

| Canada | Employees, Pokemon

(I’m grabbing food during a break from work. My phone case is also my wallet, and I have Pokémon Go open on my phone when I open it to get my debit card. I haven’t eaten yet that day and I’m feeling pretty spaced out.)

Employee: “Really?”

Me: *no idea what he’s talking about* “I’m sorry?”

Employee: *snotty tone*You’re playing Pokémon Go?”

Me: “Yes…?”

(I’d like to note that this store is usually amazing. I’m there so often, one of the women who works there calls me ‘dear.’)

Related:
Here We Pokémon Go Again, Part 6
Here We Pokémon Go Again, Part 5
Here We Pokémon Go Again, Part 4

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Candy Man Cosmetics

| USA | Bad Behavior, Employees

(My brother and I live far enough apart that we don’t see each other all the time, but close enough that we will occasionally get together on a whim. Since it’s Memorial Day and neither of us has plans, we decide, day of, to meet up at a mall near his apartment. On my way there, I realize that I left my phone at home, but I am too far to turn around. So, I’m wandering around the mall, trying to run into him, as we hadn’t picked a place inside the mall to meet. While I’m doing this, a clerk of a cosmetic store stopped me in my path.)

Clerk: “Do you want to come and try our new cream?”

Me: “No, thanks.”

Clerk: “You know you want to.”

Me: “I’m fine.”

Clerk: “Come on. Just try it.”

Me: “Thanks, but I’m actually looking for my brother right now.”

Clerk: “Oh, he’s inside!”

Me: “I doubt that.”

Clerk: “Come on, he’s in here!”

Me: “I don’t really see my brother doing that. But you’re doing a really good impression of the creepy candy guy in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.”

Clerk: “No, he was lost and scared, looking for his sister, so we let him in here.”

Me: “He’s 22 and lives alone.”

(The clerk finally stopped after that.)