Category: Employees

Being The Change You Want To See In The World

| MN, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Money

Cashier: “Your order is $8.93.”

Me: *gives the cashier $10.03; a ten and three pennies*

Cashier: *with emphasis this time* “Your order is $8.93.”

Me: *looks at what I gave her, counts it up in my head again, and decides that it was correct* “That is correct.”

(The cashier sets the pennies down, opens the cash drawer, puts in the ten, and takes out a dollar bill plus seven cents. They then pick up the three original cents and hand all of it to me.)

Me: *stunned* “Actually, can you exchange this ten cents for a dime?”

Cashier: “Sure.”

Very Slow Death Of A Salesman

| NY, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive

(I have just finished a long and painful conversation trying to get a quote from an insurance salesman. The entire time he was very slow, messed up a lot of his script and had to repeat from the beginning, and spent at least 30 seconds after each question saying “uhmm… okay… one second…” I am incredibly frustrated and receive a very high price quote by the end. I try to be polite as possible.)

Salesman: “So let’s begin the process of making you a part of our family here.”

Me: “Thank you for your help, but I am going to call a few other places and think about my options. I will call you back when I make my decision.”

Salesman: “No problem. Do you have any other questions before you go?”

Me: “No, thank you. You’ve been very helpful.”

Salesman: “Okay, have a great day. Goodbye.”

(We hang up. 15 seconds later the phone rings and my mother picks up.)

Mom: “Hello… Yes, this is her mother… No, but thank you. I think she is good for now… Thank you. You, too.” *hangs up phone and looks at me* “That was the salesman. He said he accidentally disconnected and wanted to know if you had any more questions.”

They’re All High On E

| Albuquerque, NM, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

(I have just bought a new computer, and decided to upgrade from dial-up to broadband Internet. They come and install everything, and the tech asks me to try to go online. I just get an error message.)

Tech: “Can I try it?”

Me: “Sure, have a seat.”

Tech: “I see the problem. You don’t have Explorer installed.”

Me: “It’s an Apple. It doesn’t use Explorer. It uses Safari.”

Tech: “Well, Explorer should be on the Windows disk. Where is your Windows disk?”

Me: “It’s an Apple. It doesn’t use Windows. It uses OS X. I have an OS X disk, with Safari on it. No Windows, no Explorer.”

Tech: “Oh, the Windows disk should have come with your computer. Go back to the store and tell them you didn’t get it. After you install Explorer, you should be able to go online. If you have any problems, call this number.”

(The tech hands me a card and leaves. I immediately call the number, and ask for an Apple tech. I get transferred to a rep, and we have the following conversation:)

Tech: “Okay, do you see the little blue “e” on the desktop?”

Me: “I have an Apple; I wanted to talk to an Apple tech. Can you transfer me?”

Tech: “Yes, I am the Apple tech. Now, do you see a little blue “e”?”

Me: “It’s an Apple. It runs OS X and Safari. No Windows, no IE.”

Tech: “Well, if you want to get online, you have to install Windows and IE. Call me back when you do that; it will take a few hours.” *click*

(I wound up calling the Apple support desk, and they fixed the problem for me. There was something wrong with the settings on the router.)

They Are Totally Out Of Tune-a

| London, UK | Employees, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

(I have just started a new job, and have been trying out a few local cafés for lunch. I find one I like, and start going there once or twice a week. They have a menu written on a big blackboard with various sandwiches, toasted panini sandwiches, salads, and other hot food.)

Girl: *working behind the counter* “Hello, what can I get you?”

Me: “A tuna pasta salad, please.”

Girl: “Sorry, what?”

Me: “A tuna pasta salad.”

Girl: “Tuna…? Salad…?” *looks dubious and goes to get the owner*

Owner: “Yes? What would you like?”

Me: “A tuna pasta salad…”

Owner: “Tuna? We have tuna and sweetcorn?”

Me: “No, sorry; I mean the tuna pasta salad. The one from the salad menu.” *points to blackboard*

Owner: *speaking as if he thinks I might not be understanding him* “We have tuna. Tuna and sweetcorn, for a sandwich. You want a tuna and sweetcorn sandwich?”

Me: “No, no, on your salad menu. Look, it says ‘Tuna pasta salad.’ I presume you don’t have any?”

Owner: *looks at menu* “No. We don’t have that.”

A Cancer On Your Productivity

| NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Employees, Health & Body, Liars/Scammers

(This is my mother’s experience. She manages a branch of an advertising company and her job can be quite hectic, as she deals with some idiotic workers. This coworker has been ditching work, so my mom and the other managers decide to fire her.)

Mom: “Hey, where’s [Coworker]?”

HR: “Huh, I don’t know. Let me call her.”

(Later that day:)

HR: “Hey, I got in touch with [Coworker] and she says she’s going to be out for ten days because she was diagnosed with skin cancer today.”

Mom: “Oh!”

HR: “And she is starting treatment tomorrow.”

Mom: “…Oh.”

(My mom knows this is another trick because my dad once had skin cancer, and treatment definitely didn’t start the next day. And it pretty much never will for any type of cancer. Then, this happens the next day.)

Mom: “Where is [Coworker]? We need to fire her.

Other Manager: “She just called in sick. Apparently she has a fever.”

Mom: “I thought she had cancer? You know what forget it. Call HR. Get [two other managers] on, too. We’re going to fire her over the phone if we have to.”

(Long story short, They called. She was fired, broke down in “tears,” and threatened to sue. She actually had her lawyer contact the company’s, who gave her lawyer her time sheet and demanded proof of her “cancer.” Surprise, surprise, she backed down.)