Category: Family & Kids

Those Are Some Pretty Smart Guinea Pigs

| SK, Canada | Employees, Family & Kids, Pets & Animals

(I’m nine years old. I’m about to get my first pets — guinea pigs. My mom made me research them before we got them, and my research said it was best to get two guinea pigs who were sisters. I call my chosen pet store to see if they have guinea pigs.)

Me: “Hi, do you have guinea pigs?”

Clerk: “We sure do! We’ve got quite a variety right now!”

Me: “That’s great! Do you have any sisters?”

Clerk: *without a pause* “I do have sisters. One’s a nurse and one’s a teacher.”

Me: “I meant… do you have guinea pigs who are sisters?”

Clerk: “…Oh. Yes, we do.”

Where You Have A Spit Of Opinion

| Canada | Bad Behavior, Coworkers, Family & Kids

(My coworker is a hard-working older woman with a thick European accent. She is the best worker here, and I look up to how quickly and efficiently she works everyday. She finishes serving a customer at the deli and comes to speak with me.)

Coworker: “I spit in her food.”

Me: “Sorry, did you say you spat in her food…?”

Coworker: *ranting* “Yes. Last week, I ask her if she can wait two minutes for me to finish packaging chicken. She say okay. I serve her, and she act all nice. Then, she go and yells at manager and say I was rude and terrible employee.” *she starts giggling* “So today, I spit in her food!”

Me: “[Coworker], you can’t do that! That’s against health and safety! What if she notices?”

Coworker: *frowning* “Good! She deserve it!” *happily goes to work on other things, leaving me standing in disbelief*

Be Good To Your Daughters

| MO, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Family & Kids

New Manager: *shouting* “Don’t f****** tell me what to do, you f****** piece of s***! I’m the f****** manager, not you!” *stomps out the back door*

Me: “[Owner’s Daughter], does he know who you are?”

Owner’s Daughter: *texting mom* “I don’t think so, but he’s about to.”

(We never saw that manager again.)

The Mother Of All Screams

| USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Family & Kids

(I’m new, on my first week, training with a manager. So far, everything has been going very well. The phone rings and my manager gestures me to pick it up.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Motel]. This is [My Name]. How may I assist you?”

Old Lady: “Gimme [Manager].”

Manager: *mouths* “Who is it?”

Me: “Who is it?”

(The old lady pauses, then angrily screams Tarzan-like. It’s sounds like ‘EHAHHHEHHHHHAHHHH!’. It is earsplitting, and I have to hold the phone away.)

Me: “I’m… sorry? I don’t understand—”

(The old lady continues screaming it without taking a breath. Worried that she might be having a seizure, I look at my manager. She takes the phone and says hello but the old lady hangs up.)

Me: *bug eyed* “Wuh, what was that all about?”

Manager: *matter of fact* “My mom. She hates when you ask who she is. You should have said that I asked who it is.” *ignores my shock*

Me: “Riiight…”

(Thankfully the old lady didn’t call back ever again. I switched jobs soon after, and the same thing happened at my new job! Wow.)

Rest In Peace From Telemarketers

| Virginia Beach, VA, USA | Crazy Requests, Employees, Family & Kids, Popular, Trending

(My mother passed away when I was 15 and was buried in a cemetery not too far from where I live. Four years later the phone rings and the caller ID shows the name of the cemetery. After a moment’s hesitation I answer.)

Salesman: “Hi this is [Name] with [Cemetery]. We’re calling today about pre-purchasing a final resting place. Is Mr. [My Father] there?”

Me: “No, he’s at work.”

Salesman: “Well, how about Mrs. [My Mother]?”

Me: “Let me see. This is [Cemetery] on [Street], right?”

Salesman: “Yes…”

Me: “Yeah, Mrs. [My Mother] is there!”

(You’ve never heard someone start trying to stutter out an apology so fast. I finally let him off the hook after a couple minutes.)

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