Category: Family & Kids

Those Needling Little Details

| WA, USA | Family & Kids, Health & Body

(I am being hooked up to an IV for a minor operation. I hate needles, but I’ve found that looking away and focusing on small talk helps. This was at the end of a long conversation designed to distract me from the IV being put in. I am 21, and my nurse doesn’t look very old.)

Nurse: “You’re doing very well with this. My daughter also hates needles, and she needs someone to hold her hand with injections.”

Me: “Oh, yeah, I used to be like that. When I was 5 or 6 my parents would have to hold me down for my shots.”

Nurse: “My daughter is 23.”

(Thankfully, the nurse then had to change the conversation to important medical questions.)

Registering The Bad Ones At The Register

| TN, USA | Coworkers, Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids

(I am a supporting manager at my store. We hire a new cashier who seems like a good worker, if a tad lazy. However, over a period of several weeks, we start to notice money going missing from the registers. One busy Saturday, I cover the new cashier’s register while she goes on her lunch break. During the rush, her thirty minute break stretches out to forty five minutes. This is not a first-time occurrence.)

Me: *to my coworkers* “Does anyone know where [Cashier] is? She’s been gone forty five minutes, and we really need more coverage at the registers…”

(I notice an older woman standing near the clock-in office who glares at me, but I’m too busy at the registers to pay her any attention. Eventually, the new cashier returns without an excuse for being late. The next day, my boss pulls me aside and asks if I can attend a meeting with the cashier. I am currently the only female manager, and it is considered good protocol to have a “witness” around for a one-on-one conversation between a female employee and a male manager. I agree, and the three of us sit down in the manager’s office.)

Boss: “[Cashier], we just wanted to touch base with you over a couple of things. Earlier today, I noticed you and your mom go into the bathroom with a [Store] bag full of something. Would you mind just letting us know what that was about?”

(I’m surprised, but I stay quiet.)

Cashier: “Oh, yeah, my pants got stained, and my mom brought me a fresh set during my break.”

Boss: “Okay, I see. And speaking of your breaks, we just wanted to remind you that your lunch breaks are meant to be for thirty minutes only. That’s thirty minutes when you’re not on the clock, NOT thirty minutes in the break room. Any time you’re not working, that’s part of your break. See what I mean?”

Me: *piping up* “The thing is, especially during rush periods, we really need all the hands we can get, which means we really need you back on the clock after your thirty minutes are up.”

Cashier: “Okay, I understand.”

(We depart, and I assume the problem is solved. However, a few hours later, an older woman storms up to me, the same woman who had been standing near the office yesterday.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

Woman: *viciously* “I just want you to know that my daughter is NOT a thief!”

Me: *blank, bewildered stare*

Woman: “My daughter would never steal from anyone! I was just bringing her new pants! She’s a good employee, and you’re lucky to have her! How dare you assume she’d be a thief!”

Me: “I… never said she was…?”

Woman: “And just so you know, she was NOT gone forty five minutes! She is very responsible!” *storms away*

(A little dazed and annoyed, I resumed working. I later found out that the cashier sent her mother to fuss not only at me, but also at my boss, and even at another employee who had nothing to do with it! A few weeks later, my boss ended up firing her for repeatedly failing to show up for her shifts. So much for being “responsible.” As for the registers, they stopped missing money as soon as she was gone.)


Scamming Is A Family Business

| AB, Canada | Family & Kids, Liars/Scammers

(I work from home in the IT field, but I am not on shift yet. If I am to be called into work, procedure is to call my cell phone as I always have that with me, even if I am away from home. The land-line is used ONLY when I am actually on shift. My land-line phone rings…)

Me: “Hello?”

(Only background noise on the line for a few seconds.)

Person: “Can you hear me?”

Me: “I can hear you.”

Person: “Hello, I am the senior IT technician for your computer. There is a problem with it that we need to fix immediately.”

Me: “Is your mother proud that you are scamming people?”

Person: “Yes, she is.”

Me: “That explains a lot.” *hangs up*

Going Into Uncharted Territory

| ID, USA | Family & Kids, Geeks Rule, Technology

(I’m the employee in this story. I spot a woman who’s having a difficult time getting her son to pick a book, so I go up to help.)

Me: “Can I help you find something?”

Woman: “Oh, he’s just having a hard time finding something to read.”

Me: “I can help.” *to the boy* “What do you like to read?”

Boy: “I don’t really like to read.”

Me: “Okay, then… What kinds of things are you interested in?”

Boy: “Video games. Do you have Minecraft books?”

Woman: “Oh, honey, I’m sure they don’t have video game books…”

Me: *wicked grin* “We actually have a whole section of Minecraft books… Oh dear, it looks like they’re all checked out. They’re pretty popular right now.”

Boy: “Do you have any World of Warcraft books, then?”

Me: “Sorry, we don’t.”

Woman: “[Boy], let’s find you a book that’s not about video games, okay? You need to expand your horizons.”

Boy: “One more, Mom!” *to me* “Do you have any Uncharted books?”

Woman: “I’m sure they don’t…”

Me: *eyes light up* “We have ONE Uncharted book! Let me go grab it for you!”

(I grabbed it and handed it to the boy. He was ecstatic. His mom was less than ecstatic… and I feel just a little bad for going against her wishes. But if it gets a kid who otherwise doesn’t like to read to read something, even if it’s a video game novel, then that’s better than nothing, right?)

How To Win The War Against Telemarketers: The Next Generation

| Pineville, LA, USA | Employees, Family & Kids, Ignoring & Inattentive

(My phone rings and, even though it’s a number I don’t recognize, I answer it, thinking it may be the oral surgeon’s office confirming my appointment. It turns out to be a telemarketer.)

Telemarketer: *in a foreign accent* “Yes, hello! I’m calling with an offer to save you money on your car insurance!”

Me: “I don’t have a car. Even if I did, I wouldn’t make changes to the insurance without first consulting my husband.”

Telemarketer: “May I speak to your husband, then?”

Me: “No, he’s at work and even if he wasn’t he’s happy with his car insurance.”

Telemarketer: “Well—”

Me: “Look, I have a baby that needs to be changed and fed. Bother someone else.” *click*

(After feeding my son, I grab my phone to call my parents and it rings before I can dial. It’s the same number from before. Not wanting to play this game, I accept the call and immediately put the phone on speaker then hold it toward my ten-month-old.)

Telemarketer: “Yes, hello? I—”

(Before he even finishes his greeting, my son starts squealing.)

Son: *at the top of his lungs* “NUH NUH NUH! PA! PA! PAAAAAAA! NUUUUUUHHHHHH!”

Telemarketer: *click*

Me: *pats Son’s head* “Very good. Now let’s call Pawpaw and tell him how we deal with telemarketers.”

(It’s been a week and that number hasn’t called me since. If they do call again, they’ll get an earful of the same.)

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