Category: Food & Drink

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Has Already Decidered

| Powell River, BC, Canada | Coworkers, Food & Drink

(Our local food security group is pressing apples at the Fall Fair, which we have done for several years. I like to help, because it’s a lot of fun, but I never drink apple juice or cider. To me, it smells exactly like horse pee. My friends know this, but sometimes they forget. We have just finished mulling a fresh batch of cider.)

Coworker: *trying to hand me a cup* “Hey, [My Name], try this. This batch is really good.”

Me: “Mmmm! Warm horse urine! Even better!”

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Repeatedly Making A Meal Out Of It

| NS, Canada | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Ignoring & Inattentive

(Around noon during a day out, my mother and I stop at a fast food place on one half of the building; the other half is a popular Canadian coffee shop. My mother doesn’t want anything to eat, so she goes to get coffee for herself and me while I buy myself a burger. While she is getting the drinks, I go up to the counter to make my order.)

Me: “I’ll have a [Burger] and fries, please.”

Cashier: “And what would you like to drink?”

Me: “Nothing. Just the burger and fries, please.”

Cashier: “But the meal comes with a drink!”

Me: “I don’t want a drink, though. Just the burger and fries.”

Cashier: “But you need to drink something!”

Me: “My mother is getting drinks from [Coffee Shop] right now. I don’t need two drinks.”

(She doesn’t really argue too much after that, and rings me up. My mother has gotten the coffee drinks by the time my food is ready, and when I go to get my order I am holding the drink in my hand.)

Me: “This is my food, right? Thank you. Have a nice day!”

Cashier: “Your drink hasn’t been made yet. What was it you wanted, again?”

Me: “I don’t need a drink. I have a drink right here.”

(I show her my coffee cup, and then take my food and go to sit down at a table. As I walk away, I hear the cashier calling after me…)

Cashier: “THE MEAL COMES WITH A DRINK!”

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Trying To Recoup With Soup

, | Duluth, GA, USA | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, Time

(I had decided to go to a local 24/7 diner for supper. After being seated and placing my order, I am waiting patiently when Head Waitress comes up to me.)

Head Waitress: “Sir, I’m sorry, but there’s been a delay in your order. Would you like some soup? We have chicken noodle, broccoli and cheese, Italian Wedding, chicken noodle…” *she mentioned chicken noodle two more times*

Me: “No, thanks, I’m good.”

Head Waitress: “Please, at least for me? Have some soup, or salad?”

Me: “How about some cheese sticks?”

Head Waitress: “I’m sorry, can’t do that. I can give you a bowl of soup or salad. Soup or salad?”

Me: *laughing* “Okay, I’ll have the broccoli and cheese soup.”

Head Waitress: “Very good, and again, I’m sorry for the delay.”

Me: “Not your fault. I know you’re slammed at the moment.”

(They were. There was a large party of about 15, a family in one section of the restaurant, and just about every other table or booth was full.)

Head Waitress: *over her shoulder* “Thank you!”

(I waited a few more minutes, rolling up the little paper band they wrap around the utensils, singing along to The Beatles’ “Strawberry Fields Forever” that happened to be playing in the restaurant. Later, Head Waitress brought out my soup, *and* my original meal order, which was a half-pound cheeseburger with fries. I ate the burger and most of the fries, and took the soup to go. I also ordered a slice of lemon cake to go. Always support local when you can. They try so hard sometimes, and are willing to do almost anything to earn your business!)

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If At First You Don’t Succeed, Chai Again, Part 4

| MT, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I live in an area where tiny, locally owned coffee shacks are incredibly common. Darn near every establishment has one in their parking lot or built into their business one way or another. Unfortunately, this does not guarantee that whatever barista you’re ordering from knows what they are doing, so I’ve learned to ask what more experienced coffee buyers would consider no-brainer questions. Sometimes I’m still painfully disappointed. This particular shop is part of a flower shop that also hosts the weekly farmer’s market, and I stop in to get drinks while at the market to reduce my number of stops that afternoon.)

Me: “Okay, we’ll do a small hot chocolate, but for a kid so not so hot. A large quad mocha. And I see you have chai, is that in a latte or black?”

Barista: “Oh, no, sweetie. Chai is actually a kind of tea and doesn’t have coffee in it!”

Me: *taken aback slightly because while I’m not old, I’m definitely not young enough to be called “sweetie” by the early 20s barista* “I know it’s tea. I just want to know if you serve it in a latte or black?”

Barista: “I don’t get it. Are you wanting me to add a shot of coffee and make it a latte?”

Me: *confused, starting to catch on to where this is going* “Latte means it has milk in it…”

Barista: *suddenly extremely condescending* “No, it means COFFEE. Like a mocha latte is a coffee drink.”

Me: “Actually latte comes from same root word as lactose. It means it’s a drink with milk in it.”

Barista: “Well I don’t know how to tell you this, but latte means it’s a coffee drink. But, yes, our chai comes with milk in it, and I can add coffee if that’s what you want, but it’s 70 cents per shot…”

Me: *finally snapping after having a bad day, I turn and start toward the door while trying to remain as cold as possible* “You know what? I changed my mind about getting my coffee here. I’ll just go now.”

Barista: *sarcastically* “Wait! Don’t go! I was learning SO much from you!”

(While I heard she didn’t last long, I haven’t had the heart to go back there even for flowers after that exchange.)

Related:
If At First You Don’t Succeed, Chai Again, Part 3
If At First You Don’t Succeed, Chai Again, Part 2
If At First You Don’t Succeed, Chai Again

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