Category: Food & Drink


Children’s Options Are Not On The Menu

| IL, USA | Employees, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I’m out to lunch with my parents and my younger sister. At the time this story takes place, I’ve recently graduated college. I’ve been told for years that I have a very young face, and am still asked what high school I attend. I usually laugh it off. Note: my sister is still young enough at this point to need a kids’ menu.)

Hostess: “So, that’ll be four for lunch with one kids’ menu.” *looks at me* “Oh, would you like one too?”

(I assume she is joking, as she looks to be about my age, and start laughing.)

Hostess: *very seriously* “So, that’s a no on the kids’ menu, then?”

(I stop laughing and realize that not only was she serious, she now looks very offended by my response to her question.)

Me: “Ah… no. No kids’ menu. I’m 23.”

Hostess: “Oh… OH!! Well… uh… here comes your server. Have a good day!” *ducks behind the counter*

(My parents managed to make it to our table before they burst out laughing.)


Their Behavior Has Come To Light

| NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, New Hires

(A local pizza shop makes amazing food; however, their default “doneness” is several shades darker than I like, so I usually ask them to cook it lighter. This has never been a problem until the current order.)

Me: “I’d like a calzone, one medium with extra cheese, and one medium with pepperoni. And could we get those cooked light?”

Cashier: “Uh, no?”

Me: “…Excuse me?”

Cashier: “We don’t do ‘diet’ pizza.”

Me: “Oh, sorry, no! I just meant we don’t normally like the crusts as dark as you guys usually cook them, so I was just asking you to cook them less.”

Cashier: “Well, how are we supposed to do that, then, smart guy?”

Me: “By… cooking them less? Putting them in the oven for thirteen minutes instead of fifteen, or whatever the normal time is?”

Cashier: “We cook them the way we cook them. Twenty minutes.”

(At this point he hangs up on me. Knowing they only ever have one person working the phones at a time I get dressed and drive as fast as I can down to the place, making it in 10. I bypass the front of the counter completely, and see the owner is working there, who I normally talk with.)

Me: “Hey, [Owner].”

Owner: “Hey-hey, [My Name]. What can I getcha?”

Me: “I just ordered [repeats order]. Did those ask to get put in light?”

Owner: “Oh, nah, but we just put ’em in. Those are for you? I thought you always got it light?”

Me: “Yeah, your new cashier just told me ‘We cook them the way we cook them’ and hung up on me.”

Owner: “[CASHIER]!”

(The switch between happy and yelling made me jump back about a foot! Turned out that I was the third customer with a special order – something the store prided themselves on fulfilling – that the cashier had told they wouldn’t fulfill without checking with the boss that day. It was her first day, and apparently her last because I saw her walking out with her purse before I got my food!)


Wash Yourself Of This New Management

| UT, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Food & Drink

(This night I am working with a coworker who is also a friend, and the new assistant manager. The other shift managers enjoy working with us because my friend and I have worked at the location for two years, so we know all the procedures and systems and we don’t need anyone watching us. We both pride ourselves on perfect meat record (meaning we have never dropped the meat). We slice our sandwich meat in the evenings to prep for the next day. The meats are all packaged in juice, so when you open them you have to open them over the trash can to avoid leaks and splashes.)

Me: *opening third turkey of the night* “Dude, we’re so awesome at this!”

Coworker: “It’s because we’re just so perfect at everything we do.”

(My coworker then drops some turkey. We stare for a second in silence.)

Both: “NOOOOOO!”

(The assistant manager runs to us.)

Assistant Manager: “What happened?!”

Both: “We dropped the turkey…”

Assistant Manager: “That’s it?”


Assistant Manager: *jokingly* “Haha. Well, that’s a shame. You guys know what you have to do now, right?”

Both: “Yes… record it and file it.”

(When this happens, you’re supposed to fish it out, weigh it, write a report on it stating what happened, just to ensure that all supplies are accounted for.)

Assistant Manager: “No. You have to wash it.”

Both: *laugh, but then see he’s serious*

Me: “Wait. What?”

Assistant Manager: “Ya. You just clean it and it’s fine.”

Coworker: “Uh… no, I don’t think that’s how it works.”

Assistant Manager: “It’s what I used to do.”

Me: “We were told to just report it and toss it. [General Manager] trained us to do that.”

Assistant Manager: “Well, I guess I can call her, but I say just wash it off.” *leaves to call GM*

(We do the report and toss it and continue cutting and are a little confused by his actions.)

Assistant Manager: “Looks like you guys were right. I could’ve sworn you just wash it. That’s what I did at the last place I worked at.”

Me: “Where did you work? I just want to be sure that I never eat there.”

(We finished up the night and closed up. My friend and I worked lunch the next day and we both made sure to tell the GM about his actions the previous night. She assured us that she would speak to him about it. He was then gone two weeks after that. Turned out that instead of counting the inventory, he was just guessing. There were also other instances and events that happened. He was replaced by a more competent employee.)