Category: Geography

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A Pizza Tale Of Two Cities

| FL, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Geography, Ignoring & Inattentive, Transportation

(The house that I live in is on a large area of property. We are located right on the city limits between two cities, with one part of the property technically being in one city but the house itself in the other. A lot of times when we order anything for delivery I outfit the driver to call for directions because GPS has a hard time finding us and will usually send them farther down into the next city to a vet’s office. On this particular day I have ordered a pizza and put the usual instructions so I get a call.)

Driver: “Hey, um, the instructions said to call you for directions and my GPS isn’t coming up with anything when I put in the address; can you tell me how to get to you?”

Me: “Yeah, GPS has trouble with my house which is why I put that. So, from the direction of your store you are going to turn left onto the highway and go until you see [Street]. The next opening you need to do a U-turn and it will be the first white house on your right. Call me again if you have trouble.”

Driver: “Okay, so what I need to do is [repeats directions]?”

Me: “Yes, exactly, but like I said if you still get lost call me.”

(He hangs up and I wait for delivery which should be about ten minutes since that is how far the place is from me. Fifteen minutes pass and it hasn’t arrived yet, then I get a call from the guy again:)

Driver: “Hey, so, when I got off the phone I found the actual directions to your house on the GPS and I am in front of the vet’s office. Where is your house?”

Me: “No, I know where my house is. Those are wrong directions. That is why I told you how to find me because otherwise you’ve gone too far. Now you need to turn around and go back and once you see [Street] we are the white house on the right. Got that?”

Driver: “Yeah, okay; I’ll see you soon.”

(Barely a minute passes when he calls me again.)

Driver: “Listen, I still don’t see your house so I’m just going back to the store and you can pick your pizza up there.”

Me: “I don’t have a car right now. That’s why I ordered delivery. Have you seen [Street] yet?”

Driver: “No, I’m not that far yet.”

Me: “Okay, listen I’ll just stay on the phone with you and do a step by step directions to my house. Where are you now?”

(He starts telling me the landmarks and the whole time is telling me he’s just going back to the store and I can pick up my food there and why did I give him wrong instructions. I’m ignoring all his comments at this point and am literally doing a step by step in which he still gets even more lost because he does about two more turns that I didn’t tell him to do. Finally he makes it to my house.)

Driver: “Wow, this is the hardest house to find! You need to give me a really big tip for all the trouble I had to go through just to find you.”

Me: “Listen, dumb-a**! If you had followed my directions in the first place none of this would’ve happened! What made you think I didn’t know my address?! Do you need help getting home or something because I know I don’t! You’re lucky I’m even giving you a tip at all with the s***ty service you just provided and complaining the whole way!”

Driver: “God! I was just saying. No need to be such a b****.”

(After that, anytime I ordered from there I made sure to ask for any driver but him and about three months later the driver who was quite familiar with me now told me he got fired because he would drive to the corner store, claim he couldn’t find the address, and call people to go pick up their pizza from the store.)

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Knows Zip About The Post Code, Part 2

| Moncton, NB, Canada | Employees, Geography, Ignoring & Inattentive

(A guest is wanting to check in. He has a prepaid reservation made through an American travel site that we don’t do very much business with, since their prices are advertised in American funds and after the conversion the customers often ending paying more than they would have if they had booked directly with us. As I pull up his reservation I notice that the company’s credit card number is missing from the reservation so once he is off to his room I give the company a call in order to get the credit card number.)

Me: “Hello, my name is [My Name], and I am the assistant general manager at [Hotel]. I am calling about a reservation for a customer named John Doe. The credit card number is not attached to the reservation and I’m going to need that information.”

Worker: “Yes, ma’am, I can certainly help you with that. May I have your name, the name of the hotel, and the name of the customer, please?”

Me: “You mean the information that I just gave you? Okay.” *I repeat the information*

Worker: “Okay, and can I have the customer’s confirmation number, please?”

Me: “I can give you our confirmation number but I wouldn’t have the one provided to the customer by your company.”

Worker: “Well, how can I look him up, then?”

Me: “…By his name, check in date, and the hotel name? That’s normally how it’s done when I have to make these kinds of calls.”

Worker: “Oh, yes, yes, okay, ma’am. Sorry. Yes, what is the hotel address then?”

(I proceed to give the street address, city and province and postal code.)

Worker: “Okay, and the zip code?”

Me: “The postal code is A1A 2B2.”

Worker: “No, the ZIP code. Five numbers.”

Me: We live in Canada; we don’t use zip codes. I’ve given you my postal code. You need to use that.”

Worker: “What is your zip code?”

Me: “Again, I don’t have a zip code. This is a Canadian address, our POSTAL CODE, is A2A 2B2.”

Worker: “Okay, I found it. This is Northwood Medical Center in North Carolina?”

Me: “What?! No, this is [Hotel] in Moncton, New Brunswick, Canada.”

Worker: “Okay, what is the zip code?”

Me: “NO ZIP CODE! We are NOT in the United States; we are in CANADA. As in up north, igloos and snow and toques? We have POSTAL CODES. They are six figures, letter and numbers. It is A1A 2B2.”

Worker: “Oh, I’m so sorry, madam. This is New Brunswick, New Jersey, correct?”

Me: “No! We are in Moncton, which is a city in the Canadian province of New Brunswick. We are not located in the United States. Have you tried changing the country code on your search page from the US to Canada? If it’s anything like our system you have to change the country code for the postal code or zip code to pull up the correct city.”

Worker: “Please hold while I speak to my supervisor.”

(She then sighs loudly and I hear dialing followed by ringing. I realize right away that she thinks I’m on hold and that I can’t hear her while she connects to whoever she is going to speak to.)

Worker: “Yeah, Jane, I don’t what to do here. This crazy b**** is wanting help with her reservation but she’s too dumb to know her own damn zip code so I can’t pull up the hotel to find the reservation. I’m asking and asking and she’s trying to tell me she doesn’t have a zip code. She’s giving me a bunch of letters and s*** trying to tell me that in New Brunswick, New Jersey they don’t have zip codes?”

(Pause.)

Worker: “There’s no such thing as a postal code. I’m 52 years old I’ve never even heard the word postal code. She’s just confused and doesn’t know how to read her own address. She’s probably giving me her postal box number or something. And she claims to be the assistant general manager. What a laugh.”

Me: “Excuse me, but first of all I heard everything you just said because I’m not on hold so you might want to pay a little more attention to what you’re doing before you bad mouth your clients. Second of all, those letters and numbers are in fact my business postal code. I told you number of times that we are NOT located within the United States; we are in CANADA. I have told you this a number of times and you have ignored me. Now I would like to be assisted by someone who knows how to listen and then I would like to speak to someone about making a formal complaint.”

(There is a click as the supervisor immediately connects.)

Supervisor: “Ma’am, I am so sorry about this. [Worker], transfer the call to my line, clock out, and come to my office. We need to talk.”

Worker: “I don’t… Wait, what? I don’t understand.”

Supervisor: “Most countries don’t use zip codes; they use postal codes. Remember in training when you were shown how the country codes were configured to determine the city and state or province based on the zip or postal code?”

Worker: “Yeah? So… OH! She’s not American!”

Supervisor: “Transfer the call; she can still hear you.”

Worker: “Oh, right!” *back to formal telephone voice* “Is there anything else I can help you with today, ma’am?”

Me: “No… No, you really can’t.”

Worker: “Thank you for choosing [Company]. Have a nice day.”

(The supervisor got me the information I needed just by using the customer’s name and arrival date and she allowed me to file a formal complaint which they later followed up on. I hate dealing with this company but I’m glad to know some people there have a brain.)

Related:

Knows Zip About The Post Code

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In A State Of Confusion, Part 4

| CO, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Geography

(I am calling my bank to let them know that I will be going out of the country, and may end up using my credit card during that time. This occurs after giving them all of my relevant personal information and the teller has logged into my account.)

Teller: “So, what are you calling about today?”

Me: “I just wanted to let you know that I will be going to Guatemala and Honduras from [Date] to [Date], just so you don’t put a hold on my card for suspicious activity.”

Teller: “Okay, where?”

Me: “Guatemala and Honduras.”

Teller: “I’m sorry?”

Me: *slowly* “Guatemala and Honduras.”

Teller: “Oh… What state is that in?”

Related:
In A State Of Confusion, Part 3
In A State Of Confusion, Part 2
In A State Of Confusion

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