Category: Job Seekers

They’re Barking Mad

| USA | Job Seekers, Pets & Animals

(I see an ad that says, ‘Pet Daycare hiring: No experience necessary.’ I’ve pet sat before, so I apply. A few days later, I get called for an interview and so I go. Everything is going fine until…)

Interviewer: “So you say that you pet sat before. How many dogs can you handle?”

Me: “At the same time?” *she nods* “14!”

(I’m expecting that she would be pleased, since every time that I had mentioned this to anyone, they were in awe. But she looks dismayed.)

Interviewer: “We handle 45.”

Me: *shocked* “45 dogs? At one time?”

Interviewer: “Yes. You must clean up after 45, you must walk 45, and you must do it all on your own. Large dogs. Can you handle that?”

Me: *flabbergasted* “I, uh… um… I’m not sure. I guess?”

(Right then, I was thinking of a way to politely end the interview. Thankfully, the interviewer did it shortly after. I almost told them they ought to take off the ‘no experience necessary’ part of their ad but decided not to.)

Minimum Wage Means Minimum Understanding

| AB, Canada | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Job Seekers

(I’m looking for a second job to help pay the bills, and a big box hardware store is coming to town. I head to the job fair to try my chances. I fill out the application, I wait for a few minutes, and soon I’m escorted into a room for an interview. The interviewer is an old man who looks like he’s had a very long day. He starts going through my application.)

Interviewer: “Says here you went to university. I’m assuming you dropped out after a year or so because it was too hard, and that’s why you’re here.”

Me: “No. I graduated. I’ve got my degree. I just need a second job to help pay bills.”

Interviewer: “Yeah, right.”

(The interview continues like a typical job interview, until it’s my turn to ask questions.)

Me: “So, what kind of benefits do you offer?”

(The interviewer loses it.)

Interviewer: “I’m SICK and TIRED of you yokels in [My Town] asking that! THIS IS [Hardware Store] AND YOU ARE APPLYING FOR A MINIMUM WAGE JOB! What do you want from us? A pension plan? Healthcare? What does your TINY BRAIN expect for benefits?”

Me: “Mostly I was hoping for was an employee discount.”

(The interviewer was taken aback.)

Interviewer: “Oh. I… don’t know about discounts. I’ll find out.”

(He disappeared for about 10 minutes, and came back to tell me they have a 5% employee discount. Didn’t get the job.)

Your Employment Is History

| Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Job Seekers

(I am renewing my daughter’s passport. My daughter used to be a cashier for a well-known American chain of stores that had famously opened with much fanfare in Canada, and just as famously closed two years later after failing spectacularly.)

Employee: “I’ll need your daughter’s employment history for the last two years.”

Me: “Well, she used to work for [Store], but — heh, heh — it’s closed now, of course.”

Employee: *dead-eyed stare* “I still need the store’s address and phone number.”

Me: “Um, I have no idea what the address or phone number would be, and I can’t look it up, because they’re closed.”

Employee: “Look, you need to put SOMETHING there.”

Me: “…”

(I was able to remember the address, and my daughter still had the phone number saved on her phone, so I gave them the information they wanted. I still don’t know what they expected to do with it. I would have done just as well to make something up.)

Tea-tering On A Rejection

| Brighton, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Job Seekers

(I am in my third year placement at university. In order to progress to the fourth year we have to undertake a 40-week work placement in the industry our degree is in. I get an interview for a company in a city about an hour and a half’s drive away. The interview seems to start reasonably well but I immediately get the feeling Interviewer #1 has checked out before he’s even started, and he comes across pretty condescending as it goes on. Eventually, he seems to decide he’s had enough and that’s where it gets interesting.)

Interviewer #1: “So, you left it pretty late to get something. Was that down to laziness, or…?”

Me: *taken aback at the sudden change in conversation* “Oh, I had a placement secured but it fell through at the last minute. The company had a re-structure and couldn’t take on interns or placement students due to budget cuts.”

(Interviewer  #1 snorts sarcastically and rolls his eyes.)

Interviewer #2: *trying to get back on topic* “Would you be okay with the commute to and from the office? I notice on your CV your hometown is [City that’s one and a half hours from this one].”

Me: “Oh, it’s not an issue to me. I worked weekends back in my hometown and my university is in another city to that, so I’m used to the driving.”

Interviewer #1: “How are you going to fund the travel costs? It’ll be easier for you to find a place down here.”

Me: “Well, that would be the plan after a couple of months saving some money from the pay.”

Interviewer #1: “Oh, this isn’t a paid position.”

(By this point I am getting the idea he’d made up his mind before the interview had even begun.)

Me: “But the advert says it’s a paid position?”

Interviewer #1: “Yeah, we changed our minds on that one. It’s not paid.”

Me: “Not even travel costs?”

Interviewer #1: “Nope.”

Interviewer #2: *clearly getting a bit annoyed at [Interviewer#1]’s tone* “So, do you have any questions for us?”

Me: “Yes. I read the job description and it sounds like it could be a good challenge so I just wanted to ask what sort of roles you’d be looking for me to work on in particular?”

Interviewer #1: *deadpan* “You’d basically make the tea for us.”

Me: *chuckling nervously* “Ah, yeah, I can make pretty good tea! But what section of the office would I be in in particular, or would it be a floating role so I cover some time in one department, sometime in another, etc?”

Interviewer #1: “No, you’re not getting it. You’d be making the tea. That’s it. And maybe getting the post from downstairs sometimes when the receptionist isn’t in.”

(I dropped any hint of being pleasant and looked at them both.)

Me: “Okay, I don’t think this is the kind of position I’m looking for, and I don’t think the roles would be accepted by my university as suitable towards my degree. I don’t have any more questions so if that’s all I think we can finish up here.”

Interviewer #1: *rolls his eyes, gets up from the table and walks out of the room* “Sure, whatever.”

Interviewer #2: *looking awkwardly at the door his coworker had just walked out of* “Err… well, thanks for coming in, and… we’ll be in touch to let you know.”

(Of course, I never heard back from them again. I got weird vibes from Interviewer #1 all the way through from the start but thought he may just have been having an off day; I guess he’d decided from the start that he wasn’t interested but had to interview me to fulfil a quota or something. Shortly after I found a proper placement at a professional sports club working for one of the best GM’s I’ve ever been employed by, and got through to my fourth year and graduated without any issue. But, oh, if only I’d been an unpaid tea-boy instead; think of the possibilities!)

Worst Case Scenario Is That You Get The Job

| NC, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Job Seekers

(I am in an interview for the IT department for a branch of a global appliance company. The office is about two hours from where I am living and requires moving. There are three people interviewing me but only one is doing the talking; the other two have been silent and did not speak when introduced. All three are typing on laptops. Only Interviewer #1 is looking at me; the other two never raise their heads from their laptops. Interviewer #1 has just finished explaining what I would be responsible for doing if something were to break on site. Basically a worst case scenario list. All the different things that could go wrong and what I would be responsible for has taken close to twenty minutes.)

Interviewer #1: “So you would have to fix it if this went down, too. Any questions?”

Me: “Yes. You finished explaining the worst case scenarios but is that a normal day, or what would I do if I wasn’t fighting fires, so to speak?”

Interviewer #2: *who had been silent up to this point, looks up from his laptop* “You are looking for a 9-5.”

Me: *a little confused how he got that from my question* “No, I will do whatever is needed and 80 hours a week if that is required, but the explanation of responsibilities was ‘if this breaks’ or ‘what to do if this happens.’ I want to know if something didn’t happen would I be doing phone support, or would I be at home waiting on a call to come in to fix something that broke?”

Interviewer #1: “You would do phone support. Usually, though, there is something going wrong. There has been several times they have turned the lights out on [Interviewer #3] while he is still working on something.”

Interviewer #3: “Yo.”

(Strangest interview I had ever been on. Interviewers #2 and 3 did not say anything else and did not get up when I left. Only Interviewer #1 shook my hand and traded pleasantries. I didn’t get the job, which was fine, because less than a year later that site was sold off and closed.)

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