Category: Money


Lottery And Petty And Cash, Oh My!

| USA | Math & Science, Money

(Our drawers only start with $75 in them. One of my first customers of the day gets a cash return for $63. I borrow the money from the store’s petty cash and put a note to pay it back when I have more bills in my drawer. Not long after that, somebody goes through the money transfer process and receives $100, which I also borrow from petty. About an hour and zero customers later, I’ve finished counting down the morning drawers and swapping out their smaller bills for any twenties, fifties or hundreds. The largest denomination left in my drawer or petty is tens. Almost immediately after, a man in his early 20s comes to my counter.)

Customer: “I’d like to cash this check, please!” *hands me a $362 check*

Me: *inwardly panics as the acting manager walks in. Our check cashing fee is hefty and usually a deterrent* “Um, the fee is two percent of the check. Is that okay?”

Customer: *cheerfully* “Oh, yeah, it’s always like five or seven bucks.”

Manager: *knows what I’ve been through at this point* “Can you borrow again?”

Me: “There’s no big bills left in petty; they’re all in the night deposit.”

Manager: “Hmm… let me check the lottery machine.”

(We have a machine on the floor across from us where people can buy scratch-offs or instant tickets. She empties the machine while I awkwardly stand there with the customer. She counts the smaller-than-hoped amount.)

Manager: “Only $258. You’ll have to borrow $100 from petty and take the difference from your drawer.”

(Eventually I get it straightened out and by the end of the night, everything is even. The next day, a different manager is working, and trying to piece together a weekly lottery audit he isn’t totally familiar with.)

Day Manager: “Hey, do you know by chance just how much money [Manager] pulled out of the lottery machine last night?”

Me: *in the process of helping a customer* “$258.”

Day Manager: “$258…?”

Me: *nods, finishing up with that customer*

Day Manager: *stares for a second and then laughs* “Okay, RAIN MAN.”

Me: “Hey, if you had to pull cash from three different places for ONE transaction, you’d remember, too!”


Has Zero Understanding Of Zero

| USA | Employees, Ignoring & Inattentive, Money

(My sister uses an installment plan to pay her tuition. Her budget changed mid-year and she ended up being able to pay off the year in eight payments instead of ten, but at the end of the tenth month we get a notification saying her account was cancelled and we have £80 in service fees. I call them to get this figured out.)

Agent: “The 80 dollars are late fees. They’re 40 dollars each for each month. We cancelled her account because she was late two months in a row. She won’t be able to sign up again with us for this year, so she’ll have to make those payments in full directly to the school and if she doesn’t pay that 80, she can’t sign up again next year.”

Me: “The reason why she didn’t pay February and March is because the balances for those two months are zero. I have her account open right in front of me and I can confirm it still says zero.”

Agent: “Yes, she didn’t pay that amount. She needed to make a payment, but she didn’t.”

Me: “She owed ZERO DOLLARS. That’s why she didn’t pay anything.”

Agent: “Yes. She didn’t pay anything for those two months, so she owes us the late fees and her account was cancelled.”

Me: “She didn’t pay anything those two months because she owed you guys nothing!”

Agent: “Excuse me?”

Me: “I gave you her account number so you must have it pulled up, right? Can you tell me what she owed for February?”

Agent: “Zero dollars.”

Me: “How about March?”

Agent: “Zero dollars again.”

Me: “Yeah, that’s why she didn’t pay. Because she didn’t owe anything. She paid everything off by January.”

Agent: “I don’t know what to tell you, ma’am. She didn’t pay us. I can’t get rid of these fees or reinstate her account.”

Me: *baffled* “Can I talk to someone higher up instead?”

Agent: “Sure, but nothing’s going to change.”

(I got connected to a supervisor who I explained the situation to again. When I gave her my sister’s account number, the supervisor understood right away, took care of the problem, but was confused why her employee couldn’t understand what was wrong.)


Trying To Give You Credit For It

| Manchester, England, UK | Employees, Money, Technology

(I have very little interest in mobile phones. The one I have is four years old, cost £2, and has no camera or access to the Internet. I use it mostly for telling the time and an alarm, though I do use it for texting and calls, just not very often.)

Call Centre: “Hello, Miss [My Name]. We’d like to offer you a deal on your phone, £10 a month and you get 500 free texts.”

Me: “I don’t use it that much; I spend a maximum of £5 on credit every three months.”

Call Centre: “But with this deal you can spend ONLY £10 a month—“

Me: “I spend £5 EVERY 3 MONTHS, your deal is twice that amount EVERY MONTH. Do you see why this is a deal that doesn’t interest me?”

Call Centre: “But think about all the free texts!”

Me: “I don’t need them; I’m not going to pay more money for something I don’t need.”

Call Centre: “I…”

Me: “Look, can you give me a deal that’s better than £5 every three months?”

Call Centre: “Um, no, I can’t do that.”

Me: “Then I think we’re done here.”

Call Centre: “But—“

Me: *click*

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