Category: Money


A Raggedy Sale

| San Antonio, TX, USA | Coworkers, Money, Pranks

(I’m working at the pie table and have a bag of cleaning rags under the table. Every now and then someone comes and ‘steals’ towels out of my bag so I decide to have some fun with the next one.)

Me: “Just to let you know, those are a dollar apiece.”

Coworker: “Okay. Put it on my tab! I’ll pay you Friday.”

(Comes back a few minutes later.)

Coworker: “I need a few more. Is there a discount if I buy in bulk?”

Me: “Yes. They’re still one for $1 or five for $5.”

Coworker: *thinks for a moment* “That’s a terrible sale! I’m never shopping here again and going somewhere that has better deals.”

(By this point I’m laughing too hard to respond.)


Their Pay Is Not On A Roll

| Denver, CO, USA | Money, New Hires

(Our company has a starting salary for hourly employees at $12/hour. One new hire, who is in their mid-20’s, has just clocked out from their first shift and approaches me.)

New Hire: “I was just wondering where I get my check.”

Me: “This pay period ends on Friday and it takes a week for payroll to process everything so the next payday is in about two weeks.”

New Hire: “So I don’t get paid today?”

Me: “Um, no. Payday is the same for everyone and you’ll have your check in two weeks.”

New Hire: “But I worked seven hours today. Can’t you just give me the $84 I earned?”

Me: “Payroll doesn’t work like that. Your hours are totaled in every pay period and you get paid every two weeks.”

New Hire: *mumbling to himself as he leaves* “This isn’t fair. I worked seven hours today. I should be paid TODAY.”

(He didn’t show up the next day for his shift and was let go. When that happens his last check is immediately processed and mailed to him within 48 hours. So in the end he did end up getting paid early.)


Lo Money, Mo Problems

| UK | At The Checkout, Coworkers, Money

(This is my first job and I’m on the tills on my second day. It’s during the Christmas rush, so queues are very long. I’m in the middle of processing a transaction for my customer when the much more experienced cashier at the next till leans over to me.)

Cashier: “I’ve run out of change to give this customer. Give me some out of your till!”

(I look in my drawer, which is also dangerously low on small change, and filled with bigger notes. The phone is broken, so we can’t call a supervisor to refill them, and no one has come by to check on us for quite a while.)

Me: “Uh… won’t my till be short if I give you some?”

Cashier: “Just do it. We can sort it out when the line is lower!”

Me: “I just need to fin—”

My Customer: “No, no, NO! I am your customer, not HER!” *waves angrily at the other cashier’s customer* “YOU serve ME first, understand?! SHE can WAIT!”

(I quietly finished the rest of her transaction, and then gave my coworker the money she wanted for the other customer. We both ran out of smaller cash and had to close one of the tills while the other cashier looked for a supervisor to refill. Angry customers shouted at me for the lack of change, lack of open tills, etc. Then my supervisor came and shouted at me for giving the other cashier the money. Yay, retail.)


Suddenly Not Feeling Very Loyal

| Reading, England, UK | Money

(I examine the receipt from my delivery of groceries. I see something wrong so ring them up.)

Me: “When you took the money from the groceries out of my husband’s account, you forgot to deduct the value of the loyalty points that I cashed in to pay for part of this delivery.”

Helpdesk: *having checked her account* “I can’t refund that money back into his account. Can’t you just use the loyalty points on the next delivery instead?”

Me: “But you’ve deducted the points from my loyalty card already! That’s £75.”

Helpdesk: “Oh yes I see. Well, I’ll put the points back onto your loyalty card, then.”

Me: “No, that’s not good enough. My husband needs that £75 in his account. There’s been some heavy expenses this month, being as it’s near Christmas and all that.”

Helpdesk: “Well there’s nothing else I can do. If you don’t want your loyalty points restored to your card, you don’t get your loyalty points restored.”

Me: “Excuse me? That’s £75 of my money! My husband’s money. Are you telling me that if I’m going to lose that money? Can I speak to your manager, please?”

Helpdesk: “All our supervisory staff are busy at this time. Is there anything else I can help you with?”

Me: “Yes, I want my £75 back.”

Helpdesk: “I thought you said it was your husband’s.”

Me: “I want my husband’s £75 back, put onto his account, now. I have his bank account details, which I’m going to give you, and if you can’t do that for me this is going to court.”

Helpdesk: *sigh* “What are those details, then?”

(I gives the details.)

Helpdesk: “The money should be back in his account by after Christmas, then. Have a good day.” *click*


That Wasn’t Planned

| AB, Canada | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Money

(It’s a slow day, so I and the rest of the cashiers are standing around, shooting the breeze. The store manager comes up to us. We think we’re about to get chewed out for doing nothing, but instead, he hands an envelope to the oldest cashier.)

Manager: “Just got this from head office to give to you.”

Cashier: “What is it?”

Manager: “It’s the paperwork to get you into the company pension plan.”

Cashier: “Wait… there’s a pension plan?”

Manager: “I know, right? It was a surprise to me, too, when this came today. Apparently, no one’s ever worked here long enough to qualify. Not even me! So… congratulations, I guess.”

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