Category: Technology


Doesn’t Get The Basic Print-siple

| UK | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Technology

(I work in a library. One of my coworkers approaches me with a sheaf of paper in her hands.)

Coworker: “So, how do I know when my print job has finished?”

Me: “Um, when the printer stops printing out paper?”

Coworker: “Well, I know that! But how do I know it’s actually finished?”

Me: “Do you have everything you sent to print?”

Coworker: “Well, how am I supposed to know that?”


No Screen To Protect You From Dumb Employees

, | Eugene, OR, USA | Employees, Ignoring & Inattentive, Technology

(My mom and I are at the mall running some errands and she asks me if I’d like to stop at our cell phone provider’s kiosk to see if they can replace my screen protector which is cracked. For emphasis, my screen protector is cracked not my phone’s actual screen. I catch the attention of one of the kiosk’s employees.)

Me: “Hi, I need to replace my screen protector. I got it at your store when I bought my phone. Can I buy a new screen protector here?”

Employee: “Well, what brand was it?”

Me: “Oh. I don’t know.”

Employee: “Well, you need to contact that company about getting a replacement.”

Me: “Oh, no. I’m not looking for a replacement. I was just hoping I could buy a new screen protector here and have you guys put it on.”

Employee: “You need to contact the company and then fill out the form to get a replacement.”

Me: “But I just want to BUY a new screen protector.”

(At this point I gesture to the case in the kiosk that has glass screen protectors in it.)

Employee: “Yeah, you need to contact the company.”

(My mom is bristling at this point and about to go off, but I shake my head at her and thank the employee and then walk about 20 ft. to a glass screen protector kiosk. They replace my screen protector with no problem, a two-week warranty, and a discount on my next replacement.)


Cleaning At An Alarming Rate

| AL, USA | Non-Dialogue, Technology

I’m the idiot in this story.

I recently started working at this restaurant, and as such, I haven’t figured everything out yet. On this particularly slow Saturday night, I’ve been restocking the various items under the front counter, like the sauces, cups, and lids, as well as cleaning around all these things, too. I see a button that looks like it would release something (I can’t remember what now) so I could clean under it. I press it, and nothing happens. I ignore the button and continue cleaning.

Less than five minutes later, my manager’s on the phone with the franchise owner, and we’ve got two police officers standing in the lobby. Apparently, I’d pressed the silent alarm button. I get a short talking-to, but everyone laughs it off and the officers are just glad there was no danger. The manager gives them a couple of sandwiches for their trouble, and everything goes back to normal.

I felt incredibly bad and apologized profusely, only to be told, “It’s happened before, and it’ll happen again. People just like pushing buttons, even if they don’t know what they’re for.”

Guilty as charged.


The Text To End All Texts

| UK | Language & Words, Non-Dialogue, Technology

I intend to send a text to one of our on-site team saying “Hi, are you able to send me the paperwork from last week, please?”, but I don’t get on very well with our work phones.

I get as far as “Hi, are you able to send me” and realise the phone hasn’t registered one of the letters. In my haste to go back and edit the word I accidentally hit send.

The text I sent?

Text: “Hi, are you able to end me”

I mean, work sucks sometimes but it’s not THAT bad! Thankfully the recipient found it hilarious!


Adapting To The Stupidity

| NY, USA | Technology

(My AC adaptor for my laptop died recently — miraculously in warranty. I order the replacement from the manufacturer. When it arrives, I discover that it’s the wrong part.)

Customer Service Representative: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How can I help you today?”

Me: “Hi, I just received a replacement adaptor I ordered from you, but I was sent the wrong size.”

Customer Service Representative: “I’m sorry to hear that; let me pull up your account.”

(She verifies all my information, and then…)

Customer Service Representative: “Have you received the replacement part yet?”

Me: *literal facepalm* “Yes… That’s how I know you sent me the wrong part.”

(The sad thing is, that was the EASIEST part of dealing with the company. This turned into an utter ordeal.)

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