Category: Time

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Not In The Zone

| USA | Employees, Time

(I am trying to get some basic information from a global logistics company.)

Me: *asks my question*

Rep: “I’m sorry, I don’t know, but you can call this phone number.” *provides number*

Me: “Great, and what are the office hours?”

Rep: “Monday through Friday, eight to four.”

Me: “What time zone is that?”

Rep: “I’m sorry; I don’t have access to that information.”

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The Key To Not Oversleeping

| Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Coworkers, Time

(I am a supervisor for the service desk, but because I live close to the store, I am also a trusted key holder for the store as well. At about 4:45 am I am woken by the phone ringing.)

Me: “Hello?”

Baker #2: “Hi, it’s [Baker #2] here. Just wondering, do you have a key for the back door?”

Me: “Yeah. What’s wrong?”

Baker #2: “[Baker #1] overslept his alarm and is two hours late and there is no-one in the store to open the door so we can’t start work.”

Me: “Okay, give me about five minutes and I’ll be down there.”

(I travel to the store and find Baker #1, Baker #2, and Bakery Manager all out the back waiting for me to open the door. I open the door and disarm the alarm system. Before leaving, I say to Baker #1:)

Me: “If you ever cause me to have to take a phone call like that at 4:45 in the morning again, I will jam this key far up you a** and turn your heart off.”

Bakery Manager: *doubled over laughing*

Baker #1: “Righto, sounds fair.”

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A Late Realization

| USA | Bizarre/Silly, Time

(As a single twenty-something with no spouse, kids, or pets, I’m usually assigned the night shift at our shop: one to nine pm. It’s an hour to closing and the bell chimes, letting me know there’s a customer up front. I leave my two coworkers in the back, finishing up a project, and greet the customers, a mother and daughter.)

Me: “Good evening, welcome to [Shop]! How can I help you tonight?”

Customer: “Oh, my god, it’s so late! What are you doing here?!”

Me: “Er… we’re open until nine, ma’am.”

Customer: “But it’s so late! Do you have to stay here the whole time?!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

Customer: “When do you close?”

Me: “Nine pm, ma’am.”

Customer: “Oh, my god, that’s so late! Why are you open so late?!”

Me: “…”

(And then she and her daughter left, without buying anything.)

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