Category: Underaged


Developing A Beer Gut In Your Old Underage

| Grand Junction, CO, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Underaged

(This story occurs in 1984, when Colorado still sold 3.2% ABV beer. People who are 18-20 years old can buy this in grocery stores and at “teen” clubs. Restaurants usually serve regular strength beer, which you have to be 21 to buy. I’m meeting a friend, who was born in 1965, for lunch at a restaurant/bar. When I arrive, he’s already at a booth, drinking a beer.)

Me: “Hi. Hey, I didn’t know they sold 3.2 beer here.”

Friend: “They don’t. The waitress just asked if I wanted a beer, but then asked for an ID. I showed it to her, but I guess that the way I gave it to her helped, and perhaps she subtracted 65 from 84 and got 21.”

(Soon thereafter, she comes over to take my drink order. I give her my ID, hopefully with the same flair.)

Waitress: “Sorry, hun. 84-64 is twenty. You have to be 21 to get beer here.”

(I take a breath to protest that my friend has a beer. But he glares at me, so I just shrug, smile, and order a Coke.)


They Ported The Smell

| Ashford, Kent, UK | At The Checkout, Employees, Underaged

(I’m the dippy employee in this story. It’s December and the Christmas rush has started, so we’ve been very busy all day. It’s nearly the end of the day and I’m a bit tired. A young man, 16-17, approaches with a port gift set: three small bottles of port in a gift box.)

Me: “Hello there! Do you have any ID?”

Young Man: “No, I don’t.” *genuinely confused* “I didn’t think you needed it for this?”

His Girlfriend: “I have ID?”

Me: “Sorry, but I’d need his ID in order to sell him this—” *I look at the bottle and suddenly realize what he’s actually buying* “—shower gel set! Oh, I’m so, so sorry! I thought it was the port set. The bottles are the same colour and look very, very similar!”

Young Man: “So I don’t need ID?”

Me: “No, not at all. I do apologise. It’s been a very long day…”

(Everyone laughs. He pays for his SHOWER GEL gift set and leaves, chuckling with his girlfriend. The next customer makes a joke about him “making a clean getaway”. Groan!)